Free Republic

SEATTLE - Eddie Mitchell can see it -- the looks people give him. They stare. He knows they're looking at one thing: the patch on his right eye. "Kids look at it too," Eddie says. "'You look like a pirate,' " they say. They laugh, like Eddie and I did after he told that story. But when you hear the story of Eddie's right eye, there's nothing funny about it. Someone poked it out with a stick years ago, in a fight over drugs. But that's not why Eddie's wearing the patch. He's wearing it because of something that happened...

Keeping an eye on crime BY DAVE BARRY (This classic Dave Barry column was originally published on May 14, 2000.) It's time for True Crime Blotter, the feature in which we examine reports of actual crimes to see if they reveal important underlying truths about our society (no). We begin with a shocking crime that either was or was not committed in Springfield, Ill., according to an article from the State Journal-Register sent in by many alert readers. This article states that a man told police that a neighbor ``may have switched glass eyeballs with him.'' The man claimed that...

A publican who took out a false eye and threw it at a garda was sentenced to four months in jail yesterday. Jimmy Grace (57), Main Street, Borrisokane, Co Tipperary, entered the local garda station in a drunken state at 1.05am on June 18 last year, Borrisokane District Court heard. He took out his false eye, placed it on the reception counter, and started roaring. Supt Jim Fitzgerald said Mr Grace slammed his fist down on the counter and started bouncing his eye off it. He then threw the eye at Garda Dan Maher, thereby assaulting him. On the same...