I myself started going to, and attending the high school of, Calvary Chapel Downey at the age of 14. I went there for about ten years. I was one of those in the intimate circle of Calvary Chapel of Downey. I was friends with many that worked in the church, and was known by many of the 10,000+ that go there, as well as many of the pastors, both old and new. I started having my own questions and concerns about their particular way of "teaching" the Word, and became completely outcast when I decided to leave their church altogether.
It was great to read and relate to so many of the same things in this article! I've emailed it to my one and ONLY friend from high school. I experienced the same losing of friends when I decided to leave the church. The only reason she and I are still friends is because she held the same beliefs about the church that I do...that they're judgemental, cruel, and expect the unobtainable goal of perfection from each and every one of it's members/church-goers in order to actually receive the salvation that was originally promised them from a simple prayer. It's a cruel game, this one. They start out by saying, "All you have to do is say this simple prayer, and you are guaranteed your place in heaven." What they DON'T say is that they will then require you to listen exclusively to Christian music, ONLY hang out with the best Christians as friends, go to church at least two times per week (the more you go, the better the Christian), and if you decide to question ANYTHING in the church, you are backslidden and/or your faith has weakened and you must pray for the Lord for forgiveness and mercy. Slip up once, and you are labeled (I should know, I'm a single mom and lost MANY friends when I wound up pregnant, and gained many long stares and whispers and gossip). It's amazing to me that anyone would subject themselves to this lifestyle.
For those that are reading this...I still believe in the Word of God, and in Jesus, but I DO NOT believe in expecting spiritual perfection from people, something which no human, even Pastor Jeff, could attain. I feel for those that are still going to that church, or any of its affiliates.