We can stop for some cheesecake
Posted on 07/15/2012 6:20:51 AM PDT by marktwain
I am not allowed to have a gun.
And that’s the truth. Literally, not allowed. My wife won’t let me have a gun. Not sure I want a gun, but it doesn’t matter. Not allowed. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’d sooner be granted my lifelong wish to frolic in a chocolate pudding bath with Jennifer Love Hewitt before my lovely wife would let me wrap my hands around a Glock Magnum 747.
I don’t know much about guns. But I do know there’s a part of me that wants one. Not because I want to shoot it, or because I’m clinging to the second amendment (which was written when it took 15 seconds or so to reload a musket), or because I’m some gun collector who wants to own every gun ever produced.
Nope, I kinda-sorta want a gun so that if someone ever puts me or my family at risk, I can shoot them dead.
That said, even if my wife said I was allowed to own one, I still don’t know if I’d get one. Without sounding too much like a pansy, the fact remains: Guns are scary.
But I have been thinking about it lately, especially after I found out a childhood friend of mine recently become a gun owner. He has it for the same reason I would want one: To protect his family.
And while for a majority of readers out there, a friend owning a gun isn’t cause to write a column about it, trust me: Where I come from, with my background, it’s the equivalent of a lifelong NRA member deciding to purchase a nuclear weapon for protection.
At the risk of stereotyping myself and a few thousand years of one of the world’s major religions, American Jews from middle to upper middle class backgrounds don’t normally grow up with guns.
An example of the anti-gun life I grew up in: The same high school friend of mine, along with a dozen or so other buddies, decided to engage in plastic pellet gun war during our junior year in high school. This went on for weeks, at malls, at school, sneak attacks at home, wherever. It was fun. But know this: when shot with these — even at point blank range right into an unblinking eye — the risk of injury was about the same as having a wayward molecule of oxygen go up your nose.
Yet despite the non-threatening nature of these devices, we managed to upset all of our mothers with our gunplay, including one mom who was convinced we were (very literally) sniffing glue when sitting at her kitchen table decorating our faux-weapons. Yes that’s right. Decorating them. Personalizing them, really. (This little anecdote really tells you all you need to know about me, guns, my youth and Jewish mothers of a certain generation.)
We can stop for some cheesecake
My wife bought me my first gun.
I had never given the subject of guns much thought. Then the LA Riots happened, and we were both sitting at the TV, watching what was happening, and watching the cops run away from the rioters. She got me a shotgun as a present the next month.
I know, right?
A Glock Magnum 747 is for pussies. Now a Glock Magnum 787, well, that's a MAN gun!
Sounds like he should own his testicles first...
see #32
Look closer, their mags are attached to the rifles, ready to be loaded in an instance. Why would they carry the rifles without ammo readily available? Be kind of stupid wouldn't it? As I said, look closer, you can see the mag on at least one of the weapons and I know for a fact all of them have a mag full of ammo ready to be brought into play.
Because that makes the 2nd Amendment STOOOPID, right, Jeff?
I'm pretty sure his wife makes him squat to pee, too.
The Glock Magnum 787 had a defect. You had to replace the muffler bearings every other trimester. I’ll stick to my double barreled 20 shot 88 magnum derringer revolver. Just need a new ankle holster.
All I see is their two-point sling wrapped around the buttstock. I don’t see any evidence of a buttstock mag pouch or readi-mag or anything like it. Doesn’t mean they don’t have any magazines handy, but I’m not sure where they are.
Wow! You know a lot about guns! :0)
I finally saw one (I think) but for sure saw them in the 2nd picture. Go IDF!!!
Look at it this way: when tshtf arrives, the gaggle of feral yutes will not acquire nay rifles or pistols when they invade and slaughter these Jeff types. And the very existence of such easy pickin’s will delay their arrival at your door, to be shot dead and clutter up your yard and porch. Jeff and his dominant spouse serve a purpose, albeit unfathomable to them.
Of the picture of the 4 girls the one on the far left has a mag taped to her pistol grip, look close you will see it. the others most likely have them on the other side of the gun or maybe on their person. Now, look at the picture of the 3 girls(different group) their mags are readily visible. All of them who carry weapons carry ammo, would be senseless not too.
Perhaps Jeff should first consider purchasing a functioning set of gonads prior to the gun purchase.
Played those ‘games’ too. And I’m female. Had my own cap pistol and holster for play. Not too long ago purchased a nice little S&W .38 chief special. Love this revolver. I know, I know maybe not the best choice for fire power, but I like the feel of it. Mr C4E and I love to go the shooting range and fire a few rounds. Nice together time. :-)
Jeff doesn’t get it. To be honest, I don’t like guns. They’re loud, they’re heavy, my skin sticks to the holster. The only thing that I like less than carrying my pistol is feeling vulnerable when I’m not carrying my pistol. Ideally, I’d like to wake up tomorrow to a totally safe world where I didn’t feel like I needed to carry.
Going to the range every so often to keep from getting rusty is to me an awful lot like having to to replace a garbage disposal. I confess that I don’t like my pipe wrench very much either. I’d also like to wake up tomorrow to a world where plumbing never malfunctions and I could put those tools on the curb as well.
Point being, that you don’t have to join the enthusiasts club to realize that a firearm is a useful tool that can potentially save your life.
His wife won’t let him own guns. That is grounds for divorce. I don’t believe in divorce, but a wife who prohibits her husband from doing all he can do defend the lives of his family, is just grounds for divorce.
Guns are scare? No they are not. People are scary. Jeff needs to watch drivers leaving a bar at closing time if he wants scary.
Guns are just tools. Not scary at all. Liberalism is a mental disorder, which is why liberals fear inanimate objects like guns and SUVs.
This is the first picture a Google-image search pulls:
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