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Groaner Puns (Your favorite?)

Posted on 08/22/2007 2:23:11 PM PDT by VA Voter

Q. What is a cesarean section?

A. A womb with a view.


TOPICS: News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: freepun; humor; jokes; lol; pun; puns
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To: Petronski

True.

My company, which is 131 years old, perforates metal.

Our founder invented the perforating press.

I frequently have to explain the ‘hole’ story.


101 posted on 08/22/2007 3:24:11 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: VA Voter
What are twins? Womb mates.

Bax/Bcl2, A Tale of Two Proteins--It was the best of dimers; it was the worst of dimers.
102 posted on 08/22/2007 3:24:36 PM PDT by aruanan
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets
Ma loved Pa
Pa loved Women
Ma caught PA with 2 in swimming
Here lies PA
103 posted on 08/22/2007 3:26:27 PM PDT by dirtbiker (I tried to see things from the liberal point-of-view, but I couldn't get my head up my a$$...)
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To: VA Voter

Did you hear about the lady who backed into an airplane propeller? Disaster.


104 posted on 08/22/2007 3:26:31 PM PDT by CommerceComet
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To: CommerceComet

A cannibal’s favourite game is ‘swallow the leader’.


105 posted on 08/22/2007 3:28:13 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: VA Voter

A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.


106 posted on 08/22/2007 3:28:31 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: dirtbiker

Advertisement: ‘New study on obesity looks for larger test group.’


107 posted on 08/22/2007 3:29:12 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: VA Voter

What do you call a arrogant fugitive falling from a building? Condescending.


108 posted on 08/22/2007 3:29:56 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: aruanan

It is difficult to escape being a peasant because resistance is feudal.


109 posted on 08/22/2007 3:30:41 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: Blogger

The shy stripper couldn’t bare it on stage.


110 posted on 08/22/2007 3:30:59 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: VA Voter

Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t return when you throw it?
A: A stick

Q: Where does Hitler keep his armies?
A: Up his sleevies.


111 posted on 08/22/2007 3:31:16 PM PDT by ChocChipCookie (Homeschool like your kids' lives depend on it.)
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To: VA Voter

Gravity, it’s always putting everyone down.


112 posted on 08/22/2007 3:31:21 PM PDT by Erik Latranyi (The Democratic Party will not exist in a few years....we are watching history unfold before us.)
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To: Responsibility2nd

113 posted on 08/22/2007 3:31:27 PM PDT by Lucky9teen (Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it.)
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To: Erik Latranyi

114 posted on 08/22/2007 3:32:39 PM PDT by Lucky9teen (Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it.)
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To: Petronski

115 posted on 08/22/2007 3:33:23 PM PDT by Lucky9teen (Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it.)
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To: Lucky9teen

It’s official. I’m groaning.

;OD


116 posted on 08/22/2007 3:35:21 PM PDT by Petronski (Why would Romney lie about Ronald Reagan's record?)
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To: aruanan
A woman got pregnant, her doctor told her she was going to have twins. When she told her husband the news, he asked, "What should we name them?" She said, "Adolph and Rudolph."

Two years later, she got pregnant again. Doctor told her she was going to have twins again. When she told her husband the news, he again asked, "What are we going to name these?"

She said, "Get off and Stay off!"

117 posted on 08/22/2007 3:37:23 PM PDT by dirtbiker (I tried to see things from the liberal point-of-view, but I couldn't get my head up my a$$...)
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To: dirtbiker

118 posted on 08/22/2007 3:50:25 PM PDT by Lucky9teen (Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it.)
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To: freeangel
UGA wanted to replace him with Michael Vick so he could teach those “Dawgs” to fight.

In other news, Vick and a friend were walking down the street when they saw a dog in the middle of the road licking himself as dogs are known to lick themselves.

The friend looks at the dog, then to Vick, and remarks, "Look at that dog! Boy, I wish I could do that."

Vick said, "That dog would BITE you!"

119 posted on 08/22/2007 3:51:59 PM PDT by dirtbiker (I tried to see things from the liberal point-of-view, but I couldn't get my head up my a$$...)
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To: Lucky9teen

I bet they are just down the street from the law firm of Dewey, Cheetem, and Howe....


120 posted on 08/22/2007 3:53:15 PM PDT by dirtbiker (I tried to see things from the liberal point-of-view, but I couldn't get my head up my a$$...)
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