‘Real Men Moisturize’

Jewish World Review ^ | June 3, 2005 | Mona Charen

[jjm2111]

"Real Men Moisturize." So begins an article on "Sharp Dressed Men" that appeared in a State Department funded magazine aimed at youth in the Arab world. The magazine, called "Hi" is published in Arabic and English....

The article continues: "In fact, some of them, like Michael Gustman, a 25-year-old public relations account executive from Boca Raton, Fla., even have separate moisturizers for the face and body. Facial pores can clog with too heavy a salve, it seems. Gustman exfoliates. He gets pedicures. He gets facials. He accessorizes. ... In a word, he's a metrosexual."

[snip]

...Is this what the U.S. State Department thinks America is really like? How many men, outside a tiny subset in major cities, are the primping, feminized "metrosexuals" the article lauds? ... You cannot enhance understanding between one people and another by presenting a false version of one side.

...Does the State Department believe that Arab males — some of whom do not permit their wives and daughters to go out in public without a male family member as escort, others of whom think nothing of killing a daughter who dishonors the family by fraternizing with a boy — are going to be impressed with a vision of America in which males are feminized "exfoliated," smooth-skinned eunuchs?

The State Department is apparently so delighted with the Hi Magazine approach that they are translating it for use around the world.

[snip]

In this "everybody's world," particularly the parts at which Hi Magazine is pitched, there are troubles that seem a bit remote from hair and nail care. In Iraq, half the population, according to one poll, believes that a man has a right to beat his wife if she disobeys him (and the Koran gives this sanction).

[snip]

And the State Department magazine prattles about facials.

[sinkspur]

Putting something on your chapped face or hands or lips doesn't seem like my idea of "moisturize". All the men in my family including cops and construction workers did that. Cornhuskers lotion was one product.

Cornhuskers? On your FACE?

That's rugged.

[TXBubba]

I really need a picture of "Mother" from Psycho to bring the point home.

[MadManDan]

Metros are sissies, sissies are not real men, and any woman who only likes sissies is either a pain in the ass or is a closet dyke. And either way, I don't like women like that because I am a real man! (The only thing a chick like that is good for is at 4 in the morning when the bar closes and you're drunk and bored...)

[GovernmentShrinker]

Or your cuticles from splitting at the corners and bleeding. Major turn-off to men, women, gay, straight, everybody.

[glock rocks]

90 weight gear lube.

[chris1]

I moisturize my head since it is shaved clean. If I don't, it flakes.

[Jim Noble]

Real men moisturize their women - if you know what I mean...

[MikefromOhio]

is that even really moisturizing?

I mean there is a big difference between sun screen and whatever the crap you can buy at Bath and Body Works is....


I used Sunscreen quite a bit while over in the ME. Being nearly 100% Irish, my pasty paleness wasn't the most fun experience over there :)

[ReignOfError]

I don't know what "exfoliate" means.

In a word, it means "scrub." They had to come up with a fancy name for it so they could sell something more expensive than a coarse rag for the purpose.

[AFreeBird]

I don't believe I have ever met a man who "moisturizes" and "exfoliates". :)

Well you have if he shaves with a blade. Most shaving creams moisturize, and the blade exfoliates, At least part of the face.

[Eagle Eye]

Kuwaitis and Qataris are Metros themselves!

C'mon...meticulously groomed beards...pedicures with TOENAIL POLISH!.....

It is quite possible that most all Emeratis are Metro, too, but I don't know enough to be sure.

[TexanToTheCore]

I can't believe how this thread has deteriorated. Now were counting the number of angels that can dance on the head of "Madame Oma's Rosemary Exfoliant".

For guys, putting cornhusker on the face to protect it is just our way of not having to locate bear grease. It is not moisturizing.

And any exfoliation that we wish to do will be done with "Agent Orange"

[jjm2111]

" No. They don't."

I don't know why libs think to be a 'real man' you have to be the antithesis of what the stereotype of a 'real man' should be: courageous, kind, chivalrous, etc.

[LaineyDee]

And any exfoliation that we wish to do will be done with "Agent Orange"

ROFL!!! Ok... NO ONE is questioning your masculinity! *chuckle* Now.... get muh beer! ;)

[jjm2111]

"Kuwaitis..."

Not the Kuwaiti Navy and Coast Guard types that I worked with. In Kuwait city, yes you saw some primping metrorabs.

[proud_yank]

The only 'exfoliation' I need, The GoJo that smells like gasoline is even better but I couldn't find an image.

Haven't had a razor to my face since about June, so no razor exfoliation for this guy! But I'm sure all female FReepers will agree with me that gals dig beards! LOL

[Tunehead54]

I like to exfoliate after a long hot shower. I go out on the porch with the dog and cat and grab a Dr. Scholl's doohickey that looks like a cheese grater on a stick and with a newspaper underneath I exfoliate the calluses off my heels. If I don't I end up with cracks in my heels (painful) reminiscent of the Grand Canyon.

After I get down to where I start to bleed I usually apply a liberal application of bag balm (cows swear by it) and then I'm done for another month. I prefer to moistureize with a Heineken during the process.

If I really want to treat myself I'll grab my toenail clippers and clip them the (toenails) over the toilet - my wife taught me that trick (the over the toilet trick).

I do have one metrosexual tip that even a lumberjack might appreciate. Aside from shampoo we have "face soap" - non-deodorant and for use nowhere else and then whatever else soap you want. I could toss out a couple more tips but I suspect this is more than anyone really wanted to know already - although I do swear by the cheese grater thing from Dr. Scholl's. ;-)

---

[Cacique]

There was a time when shaving was the apex of civilization. The Romans differentiated themselves that way. The term Barbarian comes from the Latin Barba, the word for beard. Of course shaving, took a lot more guts in Roman times. However, I find it rather interesting that most of our current "Barbarian" enemies all sport beards.

[Clemenza]

Que BARBARO!

All true, although the Romans did not use moisturizer. They did use olive oil in their hair, however. I still believe that the "oiled bodies" phenomenom in the gladiator films was pure Hollywood.

[Cacique]

Another little tidbit you guys may want to consider. There is a study out there I read a few months ago that tied frequent shaving to a lower incidence of heart attacks.