Posted on 11/08/2021 7:57:04 AM PST by BradyBug
The son of a dear family friend was killed Friday night in the Houston Astroworld concert stampede. He was 14 and a freshman in High School.
We have been friends with the family for 20+ years and their children and our children are essentially the same age (college and high school).
My youngest son was good friends with the young man that died needlessly in the crush of people at the concert. There is no explanation as to why and my son is dealing trying to deal with the loss of someone his own age for the first time.
As a parent, I am at a loss on how to help him cope, how to find God in the middle of the tragedy. Any help would be appreciated as would prayers for the family, the clergy and my son.
RAP Music Kills! and not just your soul and brain
So very sorry for your son’s loss & your family friends loss of their son. Finding the right words for any loss is hard for sure. Although I’ve experienced several losses, I can never find the right words for someone else’s loss. I would just let him know that it is going to take time & if he wants to talk that you are always there to listen. Prayers!!
The Problem of Evil (or how would an all powerful and all knowing God allow such tragedies to occur) is a long-standing philosophical problem. There have been many attempts to try and solve it with logical proofs and Scripture quotes, but these completely miss the emotional impact that these seemingly senseless tragedies have. I would seek out books or people that direct their attention the emotional devastation rather than intellectual curiosity. You can google ‘theodicy’ and filter out the proofs and Bible quotes. I believe there was a book called “Why do Bad Things Happen to Good People” that might be a good starting point. Dennis Prager may have a good word to say on this as well.
My best friend died of leukemia when we were 11.
Be on the lookout for Survivor’s Guilt.
Tragedy is caused by Socialist Democrats.
Next.
Explain to your son that his friend willingly went into an event with a high degree of debauchery, violence and safety risk. He ended up with the worst and final outcome.
Encourage him to grieve his friend and learn one his most significant life lessons.
God gave us guidance and also freewill. Bad things happen down here on this beautiful creation. We learn from what happens. We’re taught that this life is fleeting compared to a Heavenly life.
Amen and Amen. We have tried to inculcate in our children the idea that actions have consequences, both from the Biblical record and their own actions. It seems to have taken hold and they are all very careful to make decisions which take into account possible ramifications.
Nothing is perfect and stuff does happen, but the last of our 5 children just turned 18 and we have had no surprises yet.
the book of Job is helpful - requires thinking about it.
In WWII, my dad had requested a change in assignment from the army, and it was granted. He had skills that he thought would be more helpful, and I guess the higher ups agreed. The day after he was sent to the new assignment, his entire unit was killed in battle. Survivor’s guilt is real. He dealt with it the rest of his life.
My heart goes out who go through life feeling this way. They didn’t ask for it.
Sometimes there are no good reasons to help us understand. It is what it is. Not very comforting, I know.
BB, I’m sorry for your and your son’s loss. I pray for your eventual healing.
Probably a bit soon for that response.
I don’t disagree with a word, and you were brave to put it up.
But the question was about why God lets bad things happen, not why our “entertainment” that we willingly subject even our 14 year old children to is degenerate and what that says about us as a nation.
Yes. This.
Nothing is guaranteed to us in this life. Good decisions. That’s what we have to learn. No better way to do that than to lean on Jesus for guidance and protection.
I have a 14 year old son and what happened to little John Hilgert has really upset me. I am so very sorry and prayers up for him, his family and friends. It sounds as though he was a wonderful kid. Again, I am so sorry.
I am sorry for your loss and the loss your friends are now experiencing. As Christians we know that all are born sinful, the consequences of that sin is mortal death, and that it doesn’t matter how good a person one appears to be or how young one is that debt can be called in. We don’t get to know all the “why’s” now. When those questions arise, we must simply turn out thoughts to Christ, His redemptive work for us, and the hope that we will meet the departed - both body and soul - at Jesus’ second coming. Prayers with that focus can calm the mind.
Odd how no one ever gets trampled to death going through the door at church on a Sunday.
Went to the wrong place. Bad decision.
Even in that context, he shouldn’t be killed but wrong place wrong time.
There are accidents. People die in car accidents.
And there is evil. People do evil things.
No on knows why one person is a victim.
Ultimately it was wrong and irresponsible for a 14 year old to go to such an event. When people do dangerous things bad things may happen.
Remember him and honor his memory.
So did thousands of others that didn’t die.
I have had to explain tragedy to (Christian) children and have found it helpful to acknowledge the horror and despair of suffering and death. Some have a tendency to make light of it but in my opinion that is not honest and does not help.
Suffering and death are horrible.
I try to tell the whole truth. God alone is big enough to handle the evil in this world. It is only He who can resolve it. Or help us.
Scripture is the most powerful. A couple of texts you might find useful:
John 10:10
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
Also “In this world you will have tribulation. But be of good cheer for I have overcome the world.”
Probably. But while grieving parents and loved ones try to come to grips with a child who was killed at a dangerous and violent rap concert, lets imagine the guilt and grief thousands of parents will soon feel as they realize they are responsible for the death of their child.
Due to a covid vaccination.
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