This has got to be one of the Bee's best, because it's totally serious, lol.
Posted on 03/19/2020 4:34:55 AM PDT by Gamecock
HEAVEN—The CDC now recommends for everyone to stay home and avoid going out as much as possible. Despite this, reports are that God is breaking quarantine and going absolutely everywhere.
Hospitals, nursing homes, prisons -- wherever He is needed, God is going. He is reportedly visiting everyone and checking on everyone in this time of need and not using any amount of social distancing. God is said to be following the absolute best practices, though, and is at no risk of making people sick but only making people better.
“We have absolutely no control over the guy,” said CDC spokesman Jim Wells, “which is extremely frustrating. We want to remind you, though, that you’re not God, so please stay put in small groups.”
God is also reportedly trying to get people to stop hoarding toilet paper and instead put their treasures in Heaven. Treasures that don't include toilet paper.
Amen.
Got to love the BB (And God of course!!)
So true, even if its satire!
He’ll even appear in a small group behind locked doors. (John 20:19). Even if it’s only a group of 2 or 3. (Matthew 18:20). Someone at Babylon bee has been reading the Bible.
“We have absolutely no control over the guy,” said CDC spokesman...
“Misogynist, racist, right-wing filth!” screams the Absent Of Cortex skank.
I could tell, just by the headline.
Thanks for the laugh.
This has got to be one of the Bee's best, because it's totally serious, lol.
A good chuckle. And a powerful reminder.
And you betcha the governments would like to quarantine God if they could. They’re that power-hungry, just as Satan is.
So true, 24/7/365. To infinity and beyond!
This is funny and so true! Thanks for posting.
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