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My Wife Has Tattoos: Marriage, New Birth, and the Gospel
unspoken ^ | April 26, 2014 | Spencer Harmon

Posted on 04/30/2014 6:20:44 AM PDT by Gamecock

Today is the day of my wedding. And I am not marrying the girl of my dreams.

If you would have told me when I was a teenager that my wife would have seven tattoos, a history in drugs, alcohol, and attending heavy metal concerts, I would have laughed at you, given you one of my courtship books, and told you to take a hike. My plans were much different, much more nuanced with careful planning, much more clean-cut, and much more, well, about me.

You see, it wasn’t my dream to marry a girl that was complicated. I never dreamed that I would sit on a couch with my future wife in pre-marital counseling listening to her cry and tell stories of drunken nights, listing the drugs she used, confessing mistakes made in past relationships.

This isn’t my dream – it’s better.

Many people wouldn’t put Taylor and I together. In high school, we probably would not have been friends. She probably would have thought that I was a nice, boring, judgmental Christian kid; I probably would have thought that she was a nice, lost, party-scene girl that guys like me are supposed to stay away from. People like us, with our backgrounds and histories are not supposed to meet, fall in love, and covenant their lives to each other.

But everything changes when people meet Jesus. Jesus takes people like rebellious teenage partiers, and goody-two-shoe homeschoolers and puts them together in marriage to put something on display much bigger than their own hand-crafted, perfectly planned love-story.

Right in the middle of the mess of life, Taylor met Jesus, and he planted his flag in her life, and she believed in him and he transformed her. The Taylor who spent her life living from one pleasure to the next died, and a new person was born. A new person with new desires, and a new heart that longed to please God, serve people, and treasured Jesus Christ above all other pleasure.

And this is how I see Taylor. She is completely new, completely transformed, and completely clean. This is not because she became a part of a helpful program, or because she really “pulled herself together.” It’s because God, in his incredible, infinite kindness, took Taylor’s dark, crimson life, and made her as white as a snow. He took all of her sins on placed them on his Son, and then gave her Jesus’ righteousness to wear like a perfect white wedding dress.

In reality, Taylor’s story is my story as well. As Taylor walks towards me today, I will be reminded of how much I do not deserve the precious gift she is to me. I have spent much of my life singing a self-centered siren song. Nothing about my life cries for blessings; it calls for curses forever. Yet, God has dressed me in white, put my sin upon his Son, and given me a heart that loves him.

I love Taylor with all that I am. She is gentle, kind, patient, joyful, beautiful, and loving. I don’t deserve to marry someone like her. I didn’t plan for this, but I’m so glad I am not getting what I planned for.

So, today when she walks down the aisle to me, I will be reminded of the beautiful reality that God exchanges that sin of our past in exchange for the perfect righteousness of his Son. Contrary to popular opinion, our wedding day is not our wedding day; it is the display of the most stunning reality in the universe: that God sent his Son to die to redeem a people for Himself made clean the blood of his Son.

God’s ultimate plan in putting Taylor and I together is that he wants to uniquely put his grace on display so that other people will praise him (Ephesians 1:5-6). That’s his purpose for our marriage, and that’s his purpose in the world at large, and Taylor and I are taking part in that, and hope you will too.


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To: kjam22
I hope it works... but I put the over / under at 7 years.

there was a time, not too long ago, when i would have been "dismayed" by your comment... but not now... i know that life happens--even in the most committed-to-each-other and committed-to-Jesus marriages... things that you cannot ever anticipate... things that can derail a person... and one thing i have learned is, when/if a Christian becomes derailed, he/she often goes back to who he/she was before Christ--even for just a moment...

i do hope the very best for them...

21 posted on 04/30/2014 6:57:57 AM PDT by latina4dubya (when i have money i buy books... if i have anything left, i buy 6-inch heels and a bottle of wine...)
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To: kjam22
For all this guy knows he’s marrying the seed that was sewed on rocky soil. It may very well wither and die out. You don’t know

And neither do you, so why the speculation? I'm not trying to be argumentative here but why can't we take this young man's story at face value, wish him and his new wife well in their life together and praise God for his works?

22 posted on 04/30/2014 6:59:06 AM PDT by liberalh8ter (The only difference between flash mob 'urban yutes' and U.S. politicians is the hoodies.)
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To: Gamecock
I didn't say that it never happens to those. Did I? But that has nothing to do with the choice the guy is making. A lifetime is a very long time to be married. And it's a long time to be divorced. "I love her and she's got her act together, and life will be great because of the love we share for each other"

That's like the woman who says ... he used to beat his ex girl friend... but he doesn't do that anymore. I love him and he is changed. And in 5 years when he beats her up you and I would both say.. she was dumb to marry the guy.

What you posted is a good story. Hollywood should make a movie about it. Oh... they've already made several.

23 posted on 04/30/2014 7:00:55 AM PDT by kjam22 (my music video "If My People" at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74b20RjILy4)
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To: Gamecock

Thanks for this....


24 posted on 04/30/2014 7:00:58 AM PDT by freebilly
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To: kjam22

Hate to say it, but I agree with you.

I have two friends who went this way, both had a lot of heartache, one is divorced.

People can and do change. They can and do become different people. But you have to realize most do not change.

I wonder what his friends think? Often times they have an insight that the guy (or girl) in the relationship do not. I know I should have listened to more of my friends when I was single.


25 posted on 04/30/2014 7:21:32 AM PDT by redgolum ("God is dead" -- Nietzsche. "Nietzsche is dead" -- God.)
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To: Gamecock

And the two shall become one flesh........awesome


26 posted on 04/30/2014 7:22:18 AM PDT by showme_the_Glory (ILLEGAL: prohibited by law. ALIEN: Owing political allegiance to another country or government)
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To: Gamecock
We need to remember these universal truths when getting married:
Men marry a woman hoping she'll never change. But she does.

Women marry a man hoping that he does change. But he doesn't.


27 posted on 04/30/2014 7:22:56 AM PDT by Responsibility2nd (NO LIBS. This Means Liberals and (L)libertarians! Same Thing. NO LIBS!!)
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To: Gamecock
kjam22 Since Dec 25, 1999 .... "I put the over / under at 7 years."
sten Since Feb 1, 1999 .... "looks like someone is trying to get the freaks in society hitched by pushing a warm-n-fuzzy story"

Seems as though you old timers have either lost your way or given up.

Christ is risen ... and that changes EVERYTHING

28 posted on 04/30/2014 7:30:46 AM PDT by tx_eggman (Liberalism is only possible in that moment when a man chooses Barabas over Christ.)
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To: tx_eggman

I guess you’ll take the “over”? Have a great day...


29 posted on 04/30/2014 7:33:06 AM PDT by kjam22 (my music video "If My People" at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74b20RjILy4)
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To: Gamecock

We are all sinners, she has been forgiven.

Pray America wakes up


30 posted on 04/30/2014 7:34:51 AM PDT by bray (The Republic of Texas 2022 is here)
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To: kjam22
I guess you’ll take the “over”? Have a great day...

I married one of those "reborn party girls" myself ... 35 years, 3 kids and 6 grand kids later we're still going strong.

So, yes, I'll take the over.

31 posted on 04/30/2014 7:45:22 AM PDT by tx_eggman (Liberalism is only possible in that moment when a man chooses Barabas over Christ.)
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To: tx_eggman

Congrats!


32 posted on 04/30/2014 7:49:15 AM PDT by kjam22 (my music video "If My People" at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74b20RjILy4)
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To: tx_eggman

Sola Deo Gloria


33 posted on 04/30/2014 8:15:16 AM PDT by Gamecock (The covenant is a stunning blend of law and love. (TK))
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To: Gamecock

Beautiful Story!

Incidentally, I am involved in a Biker Ministry, and there is enough ink in my congregation to publish an edition of the New York Times.

Glory To God! :-)


34 posted on 04/30/2014 8:36:15 AM PDT by left that other site (You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
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To: kingattax

New creature ping.


35 posted on 04/30/2014 8:42:12 AM PDT by left that other site (You shall know the Truth, and The Truth Shall Set You Free.)
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To: liberalh8ter

good for Him. being the son of G-d He has the ability to wash away their sins, and insanity, with a wave of his hand. the rest of us would be dealing with it daily.

but since you have no problem with those types of people, here’s a link to your next dating site:

http://tinyurl.com/brokenbutlovable

let us know how that works out for you


36 posted on 04/30/2014 8:43:27 AM PDT by sten (fighting tyranny never goes out of style)
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To: sten

It’s so incredibly kind of you to be concerned enough about my relationship status that you’d take the time to put that link out there for me. I’m very happily married but I do detect a hint of bitterness in your posts.....did someone on that dating site reject you? Fear not and have faith that like the author of this story, there’s someone out there willing to look past your flaws.


37 posted on 04/30/2014 9:06:49 AM PDT by liberalh8ter (The only difference between flash mob 'urban yutes' and U.S. politicians is the hoodies.)
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To: tx_eggman

“I married one of those “reborn party girls” myself ... 35 years, 3 kids and 6 grand kids later we’re still going strong”

Okay, I’ll celebrate THAT. Bless you.

Hopefully it will work out for the young’ns in question. I’m single and tend to lean towards Paul in thinking marriage is a troublesome scenario in our era. Perhaps it is “better” to remain single.

Still, with Paul, I know marriage came from God and it is only normal for most to want it. Be “normal”, then, and marry. But KEEP YOUR VOWS please!

So much destruction has come from the breaking of the marriage vow, it’s hard not to question the chances of odd unions.


38 posted on 04/30/2014 9:19:48 AM PDT by avenir (I'm pessimistic about man, but I'm optimistic about GOD!)
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To: Gamecock

Well, there are no guarantees in life, but a union of people who love God and each other and are Grateful for the blessings they have been given has a better chance than a lot of couples.

God bless them.


39 posted on 04/30/2014 9:25:22 AM PDT by married21 ( As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.)
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To: kjam22

Sorry you’re so cynical. This entire article could have been written by a friend of mine about 15 years ago. She has tattoo’s and was really wild. On their first date, he invited her little boy to join them. They are a great and stable Christian family with several more kids, including two special needs adopted ones.


40 posted on 04/30/2014 9:30:51 AM PDT by cyclotic (America's premier outdoor adventure association for boys-traillifeusa.com)
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