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| I'd really like you to rub my ears, or help out FR. |
Posted on 10/06/2003 8:29:49 PM PDT by upchuck
Edited on 09/03/2017 5:38:14 PM PDT by Admin Moderator. [history]
NOTE: Pix of this FReep are available here ^.
This FReep took place on Monday, October 6, 2003 at the Happy Bookseller store in Columbia, SC from about 2pm until 4pm or so.
The bookstore, on Forest Drive, shares a building with a toy store. There is a small parking lot in front of the stores which was completely close off by the police. At one end of the parking lot there is a residential street. At the other end is another parking lot for stores further back from the street than the bookstore and the toy store.
I got there about 1:45pm. I hadn't been there before so I dove past the bookstore and turned down the residential street. There were traffic cones and yellow "Police Line" tape everywhere. There were also Hildabeaste worshipers everywhere. The line went in front of the toy shop, turned the corner and ran down the residential street for quite a ways. I turned around and drove back up to Forest Drive, crossed the street and parked in front of a dry cleaners.
I had noticed a card table and chairs set up in front of the bookstore in the grassy area between the parking lot and the street. There was a cardboard cutout of someone set up beside the table but I couldn't tell who it was because it was facing the store not the street. I walked across the street to investigate. The cardboard cutout was President Bush and the folks at the table were registering folks to vote. There was a lady at the table dressed in red, white and blue. I commented to her, "President Bush may be the only conservative here today." She started to laugh but then got serious and said she couldn't comment because she had promised to be nonpartisan. She explained that her group had to make this promise in order to set up where they were. I thought it was kinda neat as everyone in line could see the cardboard cutout!
I wandered around a little more and then noticed Hillary's Gate Cult (HGC) ^ walking up the sidewalk. We greeted each other and he said he had the devil's costume, wanted to move his car closer and went off to talk to a LEO about where we could protest. When he came back he said the LEO said we could protest across the street. There were some small trees there that would give us a little shade. So HGC went off to move his car.
I heard sirens in the distance and figured the Hildabeaste was on her way. Several people had mentioned in passing that she would enter the store from the rear. I walked to near the back of the store and, sure enough, there were guys in black suits and white shirts with earpieces (Secret Service? Hildabeaste's Private Goons?) everywhere. There was a dead end alley behind the two stores for deliveries. The Suits and LEOs were all over the place; picking up cardboard boxes and sticking them in dumpsters, opening the dumpsters and checking inside, etc. LEOs out on the street stopped traffic and into the parking lot pulled two black SUVs with blacked out windows. A LEO told me and a couple of other people standing with me to back up and we did. The SUVs sat idling for awhile and then went off and parked. I guess they were decoys or maybe a dress rehearsal. My watch said 2:17pm. I decided to just wait there and see what happened. At 2:28pm two more black SUVs pulled into the parking lot. The first one turned into the alley and stopped behind the bookstore. The second one pulled up and gave the first one cover. I realized that the second SUV was blocking my view and I wouldn't be able to see the Hildabeaste. So I hustled to my right. There were some people up ahead of me. They began waving their arms and yelling, "Hello, Mrs. Clinton, Hello Mrs. Clinton." I got there just in time to raise up my camera and take a quick shot. The Hildabeaste was yelling back to her admiring subjects, "Hi, how are you today?" I tried to zoom in and take a closer shot but then she was gone into the store. I saw her for maybe three seconds. But that was enough time to see that she was wearing CRUSTY(!) and a violet blouse.
I walked back out to the street and saw that HGC had set up across the street in the devil costume with a sign that said, "I sold my soul to Hillary." I went to my car and got my sign. It was a 4'x4' piece of corrugated cardboard. In black spray paint I had spelled the word "EVIL." I went back to HGC with my sign and kind of settled in. Then TaxRelief ^ arrived with her son TaxDeduction3. And she had chairs!! So we got to sit and FReep.
TR and TD3 made a sign (as per TD3's suggestion) that said, "Long live Queen Hillary." It even had a drawing of a crown on it! People driving by would honk and wave at us. We waved back.
After awhile three ladies that had been at the signing came across the street and engaged us in conversation. One of them said I was bringing shame to the state of South Carolina. I said, "How's that." She said, "Well, just look at your sign... it looks like something you'd get out of a dumpster." I said, "Ma'am, I DID get this out of a dumpster." It was a while lie that suited the moment and she was stunned and just looked at me. After a few more verbal jousts they left, unfortunately as convinced as ever that The Hildabeaste would be one swell POTUS [shudder!].
By 3:15 or so the line in front of the store was getting very short. By 3:20 or so the line was gone and people were freely wandering in and out of the store.
We figured The Hildabeaste would be leaving shortly and we wanted to make sure she had ample opportunity to see the devil costume. We waited a few minutes and then we could hear the LEOs walkie talkies going off and they got restless. I explained to TR and HGC that there was not a back exit and that The Hildabeaste and her entourage would have to exit the parking lot onto Forest Drive. So we walked to our left till we were directly across the street from the parking lot exit.
In a few minutes the LEOs stopped traffic in both directions. And we waited. And the drivers waited. And we waited some more. I looked down the street just in time to see a car collide with a Jeep. It looked like they got tired of waiting and were both trying to turn around and got in each other's way. I wonder if they'll send the repair bill to The Hildabeaste? :) We joked among ourselves that the holdup was Hildabeaste on her cell phone saying, "Have the protestors left yet? I don't want to leave if those awful protestors are still out there." A LEO standing near us overheard this. I could tell from the look on his face he wanted to bust out laughing but instead was busting a gut trying to keep a straight face. LOL
Then, here came the SUVs. And, for me, the best part of the FReep. The SUV carrying the Hildabeaste turned and swung into the lane right in front of us. And sitting in the back on our side of the SUV beside a window that was not tinted was The Evil Hildabeaste herself. Her lips were moving as she swept past us and saw us. I thought I read what she was saying but wasn't sure. I said, "Did you see that?" And Tax Relief said, "Yeah, she said 'THERE'S MY DEVIL'." We all busted out laughing.
We discussed going on to Furman for THE Hildabeaste's next appearance. I wanted to get home, TR said she needed to get TD3 home. HGC said he might go. If he did I hope he'll post here or start another thread.
All in all, a very successful FReep of the evil Hildabeaste. Thanks to HGC, TaxRelief and TaxDeduction3 for some great company and lots and lots of laughs. Let's do it again sometime!
PS - A note to New York Freepers: You might want to contact your junior sinator and ask her why she was out on a work day lining her own pockets instead of working for you.
GRRRRRRRRRREAT FREEP REPORT!
Thank you all so much!
And yeah...I think you have a genuinely solid point in your post script!
You know, I would like to know why, you know, she's driving around in a caravan of, you know, a gas guzzeling SUVs... you know.
Wow, she was really wearing ole' Crusty?Yeppers, she certainly wuz! Go check out the pix if you have a strong stomach.
What a wonderful way to spend a few hours and have a great time as well! Thank you for your detailed report about Hillary's moonlighting book tour. Think the "Devil" is getting under her skin? FReep On!
Well, I tell ya, you know, actually there were, like, FOUR Suvs involved, ya know? Two decoys and two fer reals.
Oh Hitlery!
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