A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day...09-02-03...."Weinie...The Canine Rose from Texas"

gizmo; dutchess, billie

[dutchess]

A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day

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~ Billie, Mama_bear, dansangel, Dutchess, Aquamarine, FreetheHostages

How precious we "creatures" great and small are. What a treat today as we feature the infamous Weinie....candidate for Governor of California. BUT...before we discuss the campaign let's learn a little about Weinie and her predecessors.

Weinie....the Canine Rose of Texas

Giz: Hi finest friends…Am heading for Texas shortly. Am going solo today. Codee and FredtheCat are taking a much deserved break PLUS let me tell you...this might be a tough one. When I first asked Weinie if I could interview her I got the following freepmail back from Lonestar

"Weinie is jumping with joy!"

Gizmo: Now….have you ever seen a daschaund "jump? " Not! …Run in circles, yes..sit up…yes...bark until you want to slap them in the face…yes but JUMP????? I think not! Okay Aunt Mama_Bear…you have Bear…does HE jump? Bet not! My point…I think we have someone putting words in Weinie's mouth….aka Lonestar… Not going to happen Lonestar…. Mom's always trying to put words in my mouth too but I refuse… this is between Weinie and me…Those are the rules and I'm sticking to them!

Gizmo: As I arrive in the great state of Texas…I am bummed to learn that our beloved president has already returned to D.C. with the lovely Laura and Spot and Barney. Had hoped for another brief encounter with them. Ah well...a future governor is almost as good as a president....(well sort of).

Gizmo: Lonestar greets me and, as expected, immediately tries to "control" the situation. I insist that the meeting is purely "canine" and send her on her way.... But before she leaves I give her a few "Gizzy kisses", and, in turn, get a nice bowl of chicken and rice...yum!. Plus...knowing my admiration for GW...she also shared with me a picture of her mother...Weinie's grandma...taken back when GW was governor of the great state of Texas....How very sweet...

Just then Weinie comes running in out of breath having been out in the neighborhood buying...errr....soliciting votes!

Weinie: Hey Gizmo. Great to see you. Hey you are one HUNK! A real stud muffin!

Gizmo: Well you're quite the babe yourself....But it's time to get down to business. How about a little background. Was your mom always a dog person?

Weinie: As a matter of fact yes. Mom's first dog was a Bulldog Terrier, Tappy, a gift from her aunt. It arrived by train. She would put it in her bicycle basket and take it to the vet when it was sick. She had no clue he expected to be paid and just assumed he sent her dad a bill. One day it was hit by a car and the doctor couldn't help. Mom still remembers the "funeral"...her dad dug the grave and her mother cried.

Gizmo: Oh...how very sad....

Weinie: Her next dog was a mutt, who she named "President Truman"--who was at the time. (Can you believe they named a nice little dog after a democrat!) They later had a collie for several years named "Ginger" who was more mom's brother (my uncle's) dog. She was a dear and lived to a ripe old age.

Gizmo: Oh that's sweet. A Lassie dog. Codee kind of looks like a minature one.

Weinie: Then on October 10, 1976, mom's life changed forever. She got an early morning call... "Congratulations! You're a "mother"...Schotze had four baby girls." Her college roommate had already "promised" three girls when the family dog was expecting a litter but wanted mom to have a puppy, "because Schotze loved her so much." Mom agreed to take a girl thinking "no way!" that Schotze would have FOUR girls.

Weinie: Mom named her new baby Schnitzel and they were to share the next 17 1/2 years. Schnitzel developed heart failure and after a round of pills Mom knew it was time to let her go. On May 28, 1992, she jumped off the sofa, looked mom in the eye, barked, and fell over on her side. She is buried in the yard under begonias. Mom's dad (who had had a bumper sticker, "Ask me about my grand-dog") was no longer there to dig the grave; my grandmother cried. So did mom.

Gizmo: (wiping a tear) How bittersweet. Codee is 16 years old...and we know the time is coming....I sure it was very hard on her. So how did she end up with you?

Weinie: Mom didn't want another dog and turned her attention to "spoiling" her friend's dogs. Then, about two years later, she got a call that one of them had found "an abused little dachshund looking for a new home." Mom agreed to go take a look but was emphatic that "she was not ready for another dog." She only went to be nice and was introduced to me "Queenie."

Weinie: The first time mom saw me I was sitting beside a playpen guarding some puppies that had been abandoned. The puppies were almost as big as me. I paid little attention to her. The groomer said I had been abused or neglected and was looking for a new home. I was being treated for heart worms and had to pass a "test" before I could go anywhere. Several days later mom got the call that I was cured and she could pick me up.

Weinie: Mom didn't really want another dog but she went to get me. She decided Queenie wasn't a very appropriate name and liked Weinie better. ME TOO! So Weinie it was and is!

Gizmo: That is so neat. And I agree on the name. Did you bond right away???? What were the first days like?

Weinie: In the car on the way home, I threw up in her lap. Nope…no immediate bonding.

Gizmo: Oh yuk! Bad move…bad…bad…bad move!

Weinie: Worst…. the next day, I went into "heat." We definately weren't bonding! But I made myself at home anyway ; soon established four day-beds and at night went to a real bed and yes…eventually we bonded….

Gizmo: Oh…that is so sweet….it took mom and me awhile to really bond too…I guess I was a little "ornery" early on… So….now that we know where you have been….tell me about the campaign…how did that happen and what's this all about????

Weinie: One day I heard mom and her friends talking about "everybody and their dog" running for governor of California. Later the same day mom and I were out in the yard and mom said, "Run, Weinie, run." And I thought--"mom deserves a dog in the race, too. I will run for governor of California!"

Gizmo: Are there any core values or beliefs you want to share before we get into the "real campaign rhetoric"?

Wenie: Well yes....my top seven reason core values in a nut shell:

1. I hate squirrels! I love it when they fall out of a pine tree and have to catch a dogwood limb on the way down. I love to guard against them. They're good for nothing!

2. Mail trucks! Who needs them? But I have one and when it comes, I let everybody know it!

3. Garbage trucks! Self-described if anything ever was!

4. Chicken and rice! I love it! Everybody should have some at least once a day. Cheddar cheese isn't bad.

5. Cars! Everybody should have one. I love to go in mine. It's even better if you can stand on the window button and let the wind blow in your face. (and almost cause wrecks!)

6. Beds! Everybody should have at least 5 or 6. I've slept in three already today. George "Slept Here" Washington had nothing on me!

7. Mae West! Why the big deal? I guess the clue word is "big." I have TEN!

Gizmo: Number 7 was NOT necessary..plus lots of folks probably didn't get it (although I did in a minute heheheheh…you're pretty good)

Gizmo: Okay…Now for the tough questions!….Am going to ask your platforms on a number of issues…Where do you stand on Immigration?

Weinie: Immigration--

I believe in immigration. But only for Germans. Austrians, Greeks and Hispanics are a "no-no." Why? Some of them have the gall to run for governor of California. Against ME!

Gizmo: That's pretty good. So how about…Education?

Weinie: Education--

I believe in the alphabet. I believe that each and every person who has any sense at all uses it LEFT TO RIGHT. Whoever heard of people reading/writing right to left? Those are people who are backward; don't know up from down. Why would anybody want to speak Spanish? I don't understand it!

I'm also well read. I've read "Millie's Book." She is my favorite author. She had babies in the White House. She named one Spot. Who said, "You can't go home?

Gizmo: That's good....what about the…Environment????

Weinie: The Environment?

I believe in the environment. I like clean air and water as much as the next person. I love to ride in the car but unlike that other b*tch in this race, Arianna, I don't ride in my SUV and tell everybody else to park theirs. I don't fly in private jets because they're going my way. Hey,Arianna! That tells me you don't even know where you're going! Don't care unless you can catch a free ride! And that Barbra Streisand. Give her a clothesline! She wants everybody to dry their clothes on a line--except her. Who does she think she is? She should sing "Stupid People Who Need Other Stupid People."

Gizmo: "People…people who need stupid people?"…. I LIKE IT! Oops…okay back to the interview…let's finish with your views on pet ownership?

Weinie: Frankly, I don't know why anybody would want a pet. It's a whole lot better to BE one! If you're somebody's pet you can be anything you want to be; even a candidate for governor of California. Speaking of which...I have a campaign speech in a few. Please stick around and make yourself comfortable. I have something I need to discuss with you! Back in a few!

Gizmo: Well...there you have it folks. Actually Weinie and I really hit it off. She asked that I stick around and kind of suggested that I might...maybe...could be"the first gent". Knowing how much mom, dad, Codee and FredtheCat were missing me....I slipped away and had a nice snooze on an anonymous passenger's lap...thankyou airlines....

As I pondered the visit....I don't know if Weinie was just trying to secure my vote or was serious but I must say I was flattered AND tempted. I am also VERY impressed with her campaign. Gosh free chicken and rice...every day for everyone... BUT....I'll take living in the midwest over the left coast any day...I mean there are some wonderful Freepers and FRpets there...but boy the whackos sure outnumber you! Anyway.... I ask each and every one of you to VOTE FOR WEINIE..... THE BEST AND MOST QUALIFIED CANDIDATE FOR GOVERNOR OF CALIFORNIA..and a real babe to boot!!!

THE WEEKEND THREAD 08-30 - 09-01-03...Labor Day Weekend

Opinions by our own 'King of Ping' The guy's good, folks!

Thanks, Mixer!

1) Click on the graphic to open the Calendar.
2) Once there you can click on any month and even click to the right to go into next year. Once you are in the month that you joined FR you will need to click on the number in the calendar and then an add item screen will come up.
3) In the next box enter your name in the "Calendar Text" field and then click on submit.
4) If any of the screens fail to load simply click on refresh in your browser and that will usually fix it.
5) If all else fails or simply if you want me to do this for you send me an FReepmail and I will gladly do it for you. ~Mixer

[Billie]

Aha! You've been holding out on us! You did that sweet vignette of weinie at the bottom of the thread? In PictureIt? Wish you'd hurry and get the other one in - think you'll really enjoy it a lot more and find it more user-friendly. Your picture-cropping looks good, too!

[WVNan]

Well, it's not a bird, but it's blue. Great to see you Ms. Billie.

[Aeronaut]

...from not laboring yesterday...

Um, not everyone did not work yesterdiddy.

[Billie]

Hi, Nan - thank you for that great big blue hug! :)

Saying hello to a few others I see in My Comments. Hope you all had a nice long weekend, just relaxing. :)

Chris, I'm glad you checked in and saw the messages about the get-together in Ohio. They are surely a great group of ladies, and know you'll enjoy meeting them, and they you...and Hannah. :)

[Calpernia]

We are experiencing operating technical difficulties, please stand by.

[Billie]

LOL! I take it you worked yesterday. :) I know not everybody 'doesn't' work on Labor Day - people still have to protect us and keep us safe, feed us, doctor us, etc.

And those who do get the day off from their jobs, bet many spend it 'working' at home - doing little jobs that don't get done in a normal 2 day weekend. :)

[Billie]

Another great interview Giz. You're really racking up the frequent flyer miles. Billie has authorized first class accomodations, hasn't she?

Nothing but the best for our Giz. :)

[Billie]

CORRECTION!!! Billie made the poster and Louie added Weinie!

Which made it all the better!

Go, Weinie! :)

[WVNan]

Yes, Billie, it's taking me a long time to get around to everyone because I'm having major slow-down with my computer and I'm on cable. Saw somewhere that servers all over are having problems. I'm waiting to hear from Maggie. I know she had to be away today.

[jwfiv]

Sooooooooo wonderful, today's interview with the redoubtable Weinie...I'm voting for her as many times as I can.

She stands quite tall for such a little lady....)

Thank you to our Hostesses...love the Pledge pic.

Regards to All the Finest.

[Billie]

I'm not on cable OR DSL, and for weeks (for me) the mailroom has timed out EVERY first time I click on it. EVERY first time! I get the "504 connection timed out" or "Web Site Not Responding" or ONE of those time out thingies. However, the FR Mail room is the ONLY SITE I visit that I consistently get that message and have to refresh it every time. Not the forum - not Google, not any other site - only the mailroom. Today I've had to refresh it more than once some of the times I've tried to open it.

The forum has been a bit slower than usual today though.

[Dubya]

Two Iraqis meet in California. One starts to greet the other in Arabic, the language of their native country.

The other Iraqi waves him away contemptuously and says, "We're in America now. Speak Spanish."

[Dubya]

Taxes.................!!!!!!!!!!


Accounts Receivable Tax

Building Permit Tax

Capital Gains Tax

CDL license Tax

Cigarette Tax

Corporate Income Tax

Court Fines (indirect taxes)

Dog License Tax

Federal Income Tax

Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)

Fishing License Tax

Food License Tax

Fuel permit tax

Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)

Hunting License Tax

Inheritance Tax Interest expense (tax on the money)

Inventory tax IRS Interest Charges (tax on top of tax)

IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)

Liquor Tax

Local Income Tax

Luxury Taxes

Marriage License Tax

Medicare Tax

Property Tax

Real Estate Tax

Septic Permit Tax

Service Charge Taxes

Social Security Tax

Road Usage Taxes (Truckers)

Sales Taxes

Recreational Vehicle Tax

Road Toll Booth Taxes

School Tax

State Income Tax

State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)

Telephone federal excise tax

Telephone federal universal service fee tax

Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes

Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax

Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax

Telephone state and local tax

Telephone usage charge tax

Toll Bridge Taxes

Toll Tunnel Taxes

Traffic Fines (indirect taxation)

Trailer registration tax

Utility Taxes

Vehicle License Registration Tax

Vehicle Sales Tax

Watercraft registration Tax

Well Permit Tax

Workers Compensation Tax

COMMENTS: Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago
and our nation was the most prosperous in the world,
had absolutely no national debt, had the largest
middle class in the world and Mom stayed home to raise
the kids.

[Billie]

Hey, you just now getting here? :) Then I don't feel so bad about saying hello to Dutchess and lonestar (Giz and weinie) early this morning and then having to leave until late this afternoon. :)

Now I need to go and get dinner ready. Glad I got to see you before I left. :)

[Dubya]

Back to work see you later.

[Billie]

You, too, Cal? Love your test pattern, though. :) Gotta run - just saw your post and wanted to say hello!

[The Mayor]

Hi, Russ - we're all glad you're getting to spend more time with us now that you got back 'home'. :)

me too!

[ST.LOUIE1]

Hi, Wolfie! Give us an AH-ROOOOOOOOOO, wouldja? Haven't seen one of those in a few days. :)

Your wish is my command, sweetheart. AHHH-ROOOOOOOOOO!

Thanking you all in advance. LOL

[WVNan]

Good evening Mr. jw. How's the job hunting going? Will you stay out west or will you be moving?

[WVNan]

Sounds like West Virginia. You're right, we are taxed almost out of existance now.