Posted on 08/13/2003 10:35:48 AM PDT by Hillary's Lovely Legs
Today was a very special day.
I had the supreme opportunity to meet Hillary Rottenbottom at Miejer's Thrifty Acres, in Auburn Hills, Michigan.
I arrived around 10:30 am, for her 11:00 am book signing. The parking lot was packed.
I went into the store and was confronted by a sea of overweight housewives in white T shirts and shorts. You would have thought that this was an e-ticket ride for DisneyWorld. Fanny packs abound.
The line wound around the perimeter of the store. Hundreds upon hundreds of clones. All so very excited. They were there to meet their Queen.
I knew I had a long wait, and I was thinking of ditching the scene, because I was in heels, and I didn't feel like standing there for 2 hours just to meet her hieniousness.
Suddenly a dear friend of mine who is the camerman for a news station saw me in line, and asked what in the world I was doing there. I told him that I was up to shenanigans, and he told me to come with him, and pulled me out of line. He took me up near the front and placed me in line. I was about 25 people back from the Throne Of Hillary.
As I was waiting, I just stood and listened to the lobotomized clones around me. They could barely contain their glee. " Hillary is so wonderful. She will be our greatest president"." She is the best wife and mother"........
And don't even get me started about the wimpy men that were in line. It was mostly women, but there were a couple of husbands, probably because their wives were too overwrought with emotion to drive themselves to the Thrifty Acres.
Suddenly, with a smidgen of fanfare, from the bowells of hell, appears Hillary!. I called an audible. I said " Oh lord, she has a soccer ball in there". Oops, I didn't know I said that out loud. Silly me.
Yes indeed folks, Hillary, looking ever so hideous in a fuschia jacket, black trousers, and black sensible shoes, actually looks like she has a soccerball in her belly. Maybe it's a tumor, heck if I know, but there is something there. Hey, maybe it's a fannypack!
Today was obviously not a 'bath day' for the old gal. Her hair was undone, no makeup, no lipstick, but she did have earrings.
As we got closer, women around me started crying. Yes, you read that right, they were CRYING! They couldn't wait to meet Hillary. I honestly thought that some of them would pass out and die on the spot. It was from either too much excitement, or the copious amount of doughnuts that they had consumed over their lifetime.
There was an elderly lady in front of me that asked me for support. She felt faint from all the excitement.
..............as a small aside, Hillary is fuzzy. Remember those soaps you had as a kid, you got them wet and in a few days they grew fuz? Hillary has a very fuzzy face. And it's very round. Pumpkin round. Fuzzy and round and falling. Gravity is not being kind. ..........
Back to the old lady....
She kibbitzed with Hillary about how proud she was of her and how she will be a great president. Hillary shook her head, signed the books that were being shoved in front of her, and then came me.
I was in orange and fuschia in the sea of white T shirts and Hillary buttons. Hillary was signing away and I said " Who's on the cover of your book?"
IF LOOKS COULD KILL.
Hillary and I did lazer beam eyeballs of hate to each other.
If only she knew that the one questioning her was actually her nemesis...Hillary's Lovely Legs.
Suddenly a vice-like grip was on my left arm, and I was pulled away from Hillary. They handed me my book, and I was on my way.
My cameraman friend said he got it on tape and hopes he can use it, but he wanted to know what in the world I said to her to make her use her " GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE face".
I told him that I said " I have Vince Foster's murder on tape".
My silly friend, he thought I was serious. I told him what I really said and he laughed. I hope to get a copy of the tape. It will be priceless.
So I left the Thrifty Acres among the clones clutching their precious books with tears in their eyes, and as I was exiting, I came across the Hillary Rodham Clinton Support Group.
This is an organization of old bitties from Ann Arbor. They all had on matching T-Shirts with a big photo of Hillary on it. They carried signs that said " Hillary" and matching sun visors. They were going to go in for a private meeting with Hillary and a photo session. They have been so supportive of her, she had been through so much and is such a wonderful woman. ( oh spare me)
So that's it. I entered the belly of the beast and got to see old fuzzy face and survived.
So where's my T-shirt?
Look again. They weren't on her earlobes, they came out of her neck. They're called "bolts".
Yeah, but when you see all the pedestrians and drivers laughing, you won't want to take it off.
No, that was me and my daughter.
We Freeped her heinious and had a load of fun doing it!
DOESN'T THAT SUCK!
I guess it's time for you to make the ultimate sacrifice for your country and "Schtup" everyone of them so they vote Republican.
Like Dorothy, you have a witch mad at you now! :-)
Feminism never struck a chord with me. Hill's fan base has been taught to blame the world for all their problems. I also don't agree with Hill's Marxist Socialist agenda, so guess I was innoculated at a young age. I registered to vote on my 18th birthday, and the first president I voted for was Ronald Reagan. Don't get me wrong; if there was a woman like Condi or Margaret Thatcher running for office, I'd vote for her. Hillary just happens to be the antithesis of everything I believe in, even though I technically fit into her demongraphic(sp intentional).
My mom always read counterculture mags regarding the One World Order and stuff like that, coupled with extremist religious views. That's probably how I started becoming politically aware at a young age, but Freerepublic is a godsend. Found it back in '98 when Drudge linked to this site, and this is the place where I get all my news.
How do you get a female that has MADE UP HER MIND, to change it?
Reverse psychology?
I'm getting the same thing. I wanted to look up her comments in the forum. They're hilarious in regards to the Beast.
Ad Mod, if you could please contact HLL and straighten the problem out it would greatly be appreciated .
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