Posted on 02/16/2016 3:28:15 PM PST by Mariner
I saw my ex-husband in court last week. It was the first time I had seen him in longer than I could remember; the exact date lost in an 8-inch-thick legal file of court proceedings that is currently lying on my desk. In fact, I could count on one hand the number of times I have seen him since I started that file four years ago.
Up until just a few days ago, I literally could not find my ex-husband.
But before he disappeared four years ago, I was a married, stay-at-home mom of a 3-year-old daughter and 7-month-old son. Then overnight my world turned upside down when my husband said he was going to the store and simply never returned.
Not only was my marriage over, but he left me with two very young children in a position where I was unable to instantaneously support us.
Quitting his job and leaving his work vehicle (his only car) in the parking lot of his employer, he turned off his phone, moved out of town, and became untraceable. His actions were not just an exaggerated statement that he no longer wanted our marriage, but it was a heartbreaking declaration that he also no longer wanted our kids.
And I’ve heard it all; the judgments that people love to throw my way. “Didn’t you see this coming,†and “what did you do to make him leave?†Or “this is why you never should not have been a stay-at-home mom without your own career,†and my favorite, “you had kids with him, you did this to yourself.â€
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Amen. Well said.
The bill for society’s failure in moral matters is certainly soon to come due, in a very big way. (not that it hasn’t already in sundried ways)
I am successful.
LOL! I’m screaming. Men leave their wives everyday and try to duck child support. What rock have you been living under? Sometimes wives leave their husbands with the kids and duck out. Its a two way street.
Divorce is ugly, sad and expensive. Try to make a good choice and commit to the relationship. Many many marriages are happy and last forever.
Oh, I have. The biggest difference is where the kids live. In the case I know, the mom was an CIO of a medical equipment company. Up until the kids were sixteen they lived with the Dad, so she paid support. She was traveling a lot.
She got promoted and stayed home a lot more. The kids came back. CS went away, because she was paying it. He had a decent job, but not anywhere near what she made.
It was the most amicable divorce I ever saw. I was a little jealous. I know all of the parties...and everyone is unbelievably happy.
But after reading some of the vitriol on this thread, I am happy I found my wife and learned how to be a good husband, dad, and man.
A lot of it has to do with laughing. At everything.
Well said. There is no room for selfishness in marriage. If either of you bring that into it and you only get misery.
I believe that, but I have never met one.
You’re probably a real catch, too. :)
I wonder if you could just say you went gay to get off the hook.
“because they weren’t careful enough to find the right one to begin with.”
You are a lot more careful when you are only going to do it once.
I met mine right here on FR.
X2. I didn’t know mine. He left when I was 6 months old. I went looking when I was 40. I shouldn’t have. He is worse then I was told
Some Men are just losers.
Some Women should never reproduce.
Good I’m glad you didn’t say you don’t believe it because you have never met one.
**”Got a wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack
I went out for a ride and I never went back
Like a river that don’t know where it’s flowing
I took a wrong turn and I just kept going...”**
Yeah, and the idiot has made a lot of money off of such drivel.
I was at a Flying J truck stop years ago, talking with other drivers, when one talked of his divorce. His testimony really stuck in my mind. Here it is to the best of my recollection:
He said it was mostly his mistake. She was faithful to him, and he was faithful to her. But, they had kids, and when he was home on weekends, he had to have his Harley time with the guys (some that had dumped their wives for younger versions), which usually lasted all day and into the night.
He said the Bruce Springloose lyrics and tune became kind of a anthem to him; helped influence his thinking. He said, “A hungry heart, He**! It wasn’t a hungry heart. It my selfish attitude. I was a husband and father, and was refusing to live a life I had chosen.”
He was very regretful. Especially when he realized his mistake too late. She and the kids moved on, with her finding another husband a year or so later.
He said, “I can’t lay the blame on Springsteen. But, I don’t listen to ANY of his songs any more”.
Those kids are gonna grow up and when their dad dies, they won’t go to his funeral. They may even hope he rots in hell. Hopefully they’ll find a religious figure who can serve as a substitute father and give them moral guidance. Then they’ll say, that was my real father, my spiritual father. The real father is a pathetic POS who no one will mourn.
My sister was married to a lawyer and she had tough time during the divorce but got custody and child support.
He moved 4 hours away and she used to meet him halfway to exchange the kid.
This one weekend there was a guy on a motorcycle who kept passing them then falling back and following too closely. Well, my idiot sister had her husband pull over and she flagged down the motorcyclist. Come to find out the guy was someone my sister had gone to school with and they talked a bit until the Ex showed up.
The Ex turned white when he saw my sister and the guy who said to him, “You didn’t tell me you were talking about ‘Mary Smith’ you said her name was ‘Mary Jones’.
My sister is convinced that the guy was supposed to kill her and knowing that the guy was a drug dealer and her Ex had been his lawyer I think she was right. I also think that if she hadn’t flagged him down like she did he might have done it.
I said I wanted the RED BMW and you got me the BLACK BMW, you have RUINED MY LIFE, I HATE YOU and I’m NEVER GOING TO SPEAK TO YOU AGAIN AS LONG AS I LIVE!!!!!
That’s not really the woman from the article.
The one in the picture might be the sweetest person you’d ever want to meet.
Don’t the CS payments just add up along with the prison fees the whole time they’re incarcerated?
You let me be who I am and there’s no problem, however .....
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