Posted on 04/13/2010 4:08:14 PM PDT by bonidee
I woke up this morning to the sound of my alarm clock, which is powered by electricity provided by the public power monopoly that is regulated by the US Department of Energy. I then proceeded to take a shower in clean, drinkable water from the Municipal Water Utility. After that, I watched on of the FCC regulated channels on my TV to see what the National Weather Service of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration determinded the weather would be like by usinc satellites launced, maintained, designed and built by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. I watched this while eating my breakfast of US Department of Agriculture inspected food and taking my medication that was deemed safe for me to use by the Food and Drug Administration.
At the appropriate time as regulated by the US Congress and kept accurate by the National Institute of Standards and Technology, and the US Naval Observatory, I got into my National Highway and Traffic Safety Administration approved automobile and set out on roads built by local, state and federal Departments of Transportation. I stopped and purchased fuel of a quality level determined by the Environmental Protection Agency using legal tender issued by the Federal Reserve Bank.
After work, I drove my NHTSA car back over the DOT roads, to a house which has not burned down in my absence thanks to state and local building codes, as well as the fire marshall's inspection. In the event that it had been set ablaze, I would expect for the fire department to make themselves present and douse the flames. Upon realizing that this hasn't happened, I also noticed that my residence had also not been plundered of all its valuables thanks to the local police fighting crime in my neighborhood.
I then log onto the internet, which was developed by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Administration and post on freerepublic.com and the Fox News Forums about now Socialism in medicine is bad and the government can't do anything right.
And all of these things would be much better and much cheaper if they were privatized. Take that “bonidee”!
Buh bye. Thanks for playing.
I, I, I...ain’t it all about YOU...last I looked, there wasn’t any I in team...stfu, lead, follow or gtf out of the way.
Welcome to FR NEWBIE!
You joined today to spew this crap!
FYI, All the things you mention were developed during a time of American greatness, not today!
Riiigght.
Here’s what you really did:
10:00am Get out of bed and go to the couch to wait for the welfare check to show up. In the meantime, I sit around pullin hits off the bong, soaking in as much librul media as I can, laugh at how stupid the RightWingNuts Stanley Hubbard, Rupert Murdoch, Gannett, Knight-Ridder, and Clear Channel are to allow their media conglomerates be used indoctrinate the populace with librul ideas.
1:00 The welfare checks only come twice a month so the other 28 afternoons that Im not at the casino to cash and spend my check Im free to pick up a few extra bucks driving my sky-blue Cadillac around to force women to go to the abortion clinic. They pay $20 dollars for every woman I bring in with a $50 bonus for every teenage daughter of a registered Republican. On Thursdays I have a regular gig recruiting homosexuals by passing out literature at the local middle school. The best technique is to tell them how great it is to be gay because nobody ever bothers you and especially because theyll have all kinds of special rights again $50 bonus for every teenage recruit whose parent is a registered Republican.
4:20 Back home for a few more pulls off the bong.
5:00 Night School at the Academy for Communist Conspiracy and World Domination. Most courses are dedicated to the subversion of small businesses and other capitalist enterprises, but two nights a week are dedicated to eco-terrorrism where we learn cool things like torching SUVs.
9:00 - ??? Satanic gatherings sponsored by the ACLU. We usually drink the blood of fetuses after we take acid, then we conjure pagan spirits to force G*d out of murika.
Then its back to bed to do it all over again.
you’re young , probably just left college and haven’t really lived in the real world yet but when you do and you have kids , get a house etc then you will see that the crap fed to you by your liberal professors and friends does not work.
Yes it sounds good and it was a good laugh poking fun at those people who oppose an agenda which clearly does not work but hey it was a good time and maybe one day you could sign up on a right wing site to post something in order to get a rise out of it and then quickly report back to your friends boating about what you have done.
I left a socialist country for the American dream and now we have a clueless idiot in power backed by brainless idiots who have to be given bumper sticker slogans given to them so they can pretend they have some brains.
The level of education and common sense by the left in this country is awful and yes seeing as the left likes to pretend to be cultured I know as I have lived in many countries and no first hand what socialism is.
So please while you support socialism or Marxism then tell people you are pone instead of pretending you are not.
Anyway enjoy now paying bills, paying loans off and looking for a job under the messiah.
And to think that some people say that the government doesn’t have its filthy claws dug into every aspect of our lives.
I guess if you’re a helpless moron, you might need all that government support, but I can manage just fine without big brother.
Damn! Do you know this dude?
Perfect!
I missed the zot. Viking Kitties strike again!
That’s probly not ALL you got today...
any lefty cannot explain it as they only know bumper sticker slogans.
right about now the poster is reporting back to their left kook site and saying look at me I did this.
Gotta wonder why the zotted bonidee even bothers to wake up in the morning. It seems the only purpose to his/her/its life is to consume government-made services. Such a life ain’t worth living.
“There was electricity before the Fedgov took it over...there was clean water before the Congress passed the Clean Water Act...I could go on but youd miss the point.”
Any idea how much regulation there was on gas back when it was 26 cents a gallon? I was just telling my kids how it was no big deal when I was a kid to scrape up enough change around the house to fill the five-gallon can for the fishing boat. Now, as an adult, I think “how can this little can cost me $15!
Celebrating April 15th a bit early, eh?
Wow. Like we haven’t seen this email/post before.
You know what I did today?
I woke up and cooked my family a delicious breakfast of locally produced eggs and homemade toast. I packed a bag for my husband’s upcoming National Guard drill. I taught my children their school from a curriculum that we paid for out of our own pocket, despite the taxes we pay to the local government for access to public school. I walked my dogs, for whom I pay a fee to the government just for the benefit of owning them. We tried to avoid the numerous vicious strays which Animal Control refuses to pick up.
I planned my shopping list for the next two weeks which consists mostly of beans and flour, with a few meat meals thrown in so we don’t feel like we’re starving; I may be able to afford fresh fruit this time to ward off scurvy.
I folded the laundry, most of which comes from Goodwill, and did the dishes while contemplating the illegal aliens next door, resting out on the porch while they await transportation to the next stop in their ‘underground railroad’.
We’ll be going to the in-laws for dinner tonight, where I will try to explain why we will not immediately benefit from Obama’s socialized health care, mainly because it now consists only of a tax.
Note the Congress is telling this luser when to go to work... not the private business it works for.
Nicely replied.
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