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Billy Bashes Bob (Mugabe gets gored by billy goat)
http://zimdaily.com/news2/article.php/20051221063315837.html ^

Posted on 12/23/2005 7:13:05 PM PST by gop4lyf

A billy goat did some rough, instant justice to the President when his motorcade stopped to refuel en-route to the eastern resorts of Nyanga. The president, popularly known as Bob got out to stretch his legs, and speak to a couple locals. He was holding a bottle of water, when a Billy goat developed a profound interest and chose to pursue it. Whilst Bob swung the bottle at the goat, it quickly and sharply pierced Bob's scrotum, and large bowel. Mugabe's notorious bodyguards seemed unable to prevent the attack as the goat lunged towards the president, perhaps the goat should be handling his security in future. By the time they reached Christmas pass outside mutare, the President was in horrible pain and had to be rushed to a secret location in Mutare for medical treatment.

It is not clear why the president was visiting Nyanga but Zimdaily understands Mugabe has a secret passion for gambling. He is rumoured to have visited Montclair Hotel in Nyanga endless times to fulfill his gambling desires, as he cannot use the facilities in Harare Showgrounds for security reasons. Grace Mugabe, the president's young wife, is believed to be in Pretoria doing what she does best, last minute shopping for Xmas.

Rumours are mounting that the couple have a strained relationship and to be in separate countries so close to the festive season is a telling indicator that this is indeed likely to be true. It is almost common knowledge that they no longer sleep in the same bed, so this twist in events is unlikely to make that much of a difference to a marriage that seems to revolve around convenience.

The president is also rumoured to be in the process of acquiring a private jet to allow him to make more frequent, long distance trips more securely and to reduce the burden of fueling hassles. He is expected to join Grace and the children in South Africa once the doctors give him the all clear.


TOPICS: Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: mugabe; ownage; owned; pwn3d; pwn4g3
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To: gop4lyf
Humorous, fact or not, Bob got horned by Billy.
61 posted on 12/23/2005 8:27:13 PM PST by Ursus arctos horribilis ("It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees!" Emiliano Zapata 1879-1919)
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To: gop4lyf
it quickly and sharply pierced Bob's scrotum, and large bowel.

I just hate it when that happens.

62 posted on 12/23/2005 8:35:25 PM PST by elkfersupper
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To: gop4lyf
“Don't approach a goat from the front, a horse from the back, or a fool from any side.”
63 posted on 12/23/2005 8:41:24 PM PST by HuntsvilleTxVeteran (Giving power and money to Congress is like giving liquor and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rour)
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To: McGavin999

How good are the medical facilities there? I think the veterinarians here would do a better job-have better equipment available too.


64 posted on 12/23/2005 9:02:57 PM PST by Farmer Dean (Every time a toilet flushes,another liberal gets his brains.)
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To: cripplecreek

rofl


Ya gotta wonder, has anyone in the history of the world ever cried, "Scrotum!"


65 posted on 12/23/2005 9:04:15 PM PST by kenth (Come back here... so that I may brain thee!)
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To: 76834
The will have to open him up and suture the bowel and lavage the peritoneal cavity. Unfortunately with good care and antibiotics he will recover.
66 posted on 12/23/2005 9:06:57 PM PST by cpdiii (roughneck (oil field trash and proud of it), geologist, pilot, pharmacist, full time iconoclast)
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To: gop4lyf

I lost a good friend a couple of years ago due to his getting a minor wound from a "not quite dead" deer.

It was only a scratch, but infection set in and killed him.
He had a weakened immune system from prior liver damage.

This sounds like a real wound, I hope Mugabe dies of it, quickly!
Theta would be Christmas gift to all of Africa.


67 posted on 12/23/2005 9:06:58 PM PST by Richard-SIA ("The natural progress of things is for government to gain ground and for liberty to yield" JEFFERSON)
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To: gop4lyf

may he wound go septic in a terminal manner. Hopefully the billygoat had been dipping it's horns in something really vile
prior to goring the Chimp.


68 posted on 12/23/2005 10:24:35 PM PST by injin
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To: Vicki

Why would you want the goat to die?


69 posted on 12/23/2005 10:30:35 PM PST by Old Seadog (Inside every old person is a young person saying "WTF happened?".)
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Bump


70 posted on 12/24/2005 6:10:18 AM PST by listenhillary ("Mainstream media" is creating it's own reality~everything sucks)
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To: kenth

William Wallace: Aye, fight and you may die, run, and you'll live...at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade all of that from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take away our lives, but they'll never take our scrotuuuuummmms!


71 posted on 12/24/2005 8:05:18 AM PST by cripplecreek (Never a minigun handy when you need one.)
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To: cripplecreek

ROFLMAO... that's too good.



Merry Christmas CC. Thanks for the best laugh I've had today.


72 posted on 12/24/2005 3:32:00 PM PST by kenth (Come back here... so that I may brain thee!)
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