FReeper Canteen~What Makes You Laugh?~July 28, 2005~

July 27, 2005 | bentfeather

[Soaring Feather]

For the freedom you enjoyed yesterday...
Thank the Veterans who served in The United States Armed Forces.

Looking forward to tomorrow's freedom?
Support The United States Armed Forces Today!

Good morning TROOPS!!
What makes you laugh??
Post your funny cartoons, jokes, anything you enjoy!

This one always cracks me up!

You Might Be A Soldier If..

Silly cartoon characters??

What tickles your funny bone??
A good joke, funny cartoons, a practical joker?

Computer humor?

"Why We Love Kids"

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

2. HONESTY

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago."

3. OPINIONS

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

4. KETCHUP

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang, so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "It's the minister, Mommy," the child said. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

5. MORE NUDITY

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

6. POLICE # 1

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?" "Yes," I answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help, I should ask the police. Is that right?" "Yes, that's right," I told her. "Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

7. POLICE # 2

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

8. ELDERLY

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

9. DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."

10. DEATH

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaaaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he gooooes."

11. SCHOOL

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk."

12. BIBLE

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear."

bentfeather

[Soaring Feather]

~Ottmar Liebert~Starry Night~

[bannie]

This...

Is just down the road from me.

Kern County is not for wimps.

[NYTexan]

Likewise Lauren!

Stay'n cool?

A water slide park recently opened next to the casino in Niagara Falls! Looks like fun!

[laurenmarlowe]

Indie Channel 39 is still on here, LOL! But not showin' anything recognizable anymore :o(

I hope you have a great time with your family for your birthday. I hope to see ya this weekend!

[GodBlessUSA]

So far no bored kids. :) My son will start Football practice soon. They really exercise them. First thing in the morning. Last thing in the day. LOL! A month of grueling exercise. He's a senior so he is especially excited about the football. ;)

My daughter loves being home. I wish I could keep her home, but I won't let her know that. :) We have had company a lot. We are going away visiting this weekend.

[GodBlessUSA]

LOL! :)

[Kathy in Alaska]

WOW, SA......what a beautiful presentation you've made for cedarswingman's, I Am An American.

[luvie]

This is Wattsburger. Absolutely nothing like Fuddrucker's! It has been here since the '50s and used to be the southern end turn-around of the drag (which was up-and-down that street there in the foreground) here in Odessa. Best hamburger in the whole world--the old-fashioned type with fried meat and the bun warmed on the grill with the meat. Big ole crispy fries. Not good if you have heart trouble! LOL!.....end of history lesson. :o)

[TASMANIANRED]

Sorry you have had one of those days.

[Army Air Corps]

Muchas gracias!

Okay, show of hands: How many people will admit to enjoying the Monkees TV show?

I raise my hand. Some of the shows were like stuff outta Mad magazine.

[MS.BEHAVIN]

Boy, I'll say!
I'm glad to see you!
Hugs!
Ms.B

[TASMANIANRED]

oops.

[laurenmarlowe]

Oh man, I am so ready to break out to new adventures.

Water slide park and casino and Niagara Falls all sound like such fun!!

{{HUGS}} NYTexan, so dreamy!

[bannie]

The County Sheriff caught hell for that picture. Most of us thought it was funny; and he should have gotten a laugh: Not a scolding.

[GodBlessUSA]

Excellent! Very Beautiful LuvW!

[SevenofNine]

OH MAN I love old Batman TV show LOL!
You know what on Saturday they have channel one channel show cops shows
I tell you lineup that stay with Channel 13 would have Hawaii Five-O Dragnet Kojak and sometime Universal movies like Columbo and McCloud LOL!

Then one channel has Batman and Superman
Then other channel on weekend would show Godzilla in late moring and afternoon then in evening around 8pm
They show Kung Fu movies LOL!

Well Brit FT reporting that dude that was guru of Beatles Marharari Yogi is getting his group together build biggest building in INdia LOL!

[TASMANIANRED]

Hugs to you too.

58 calls and another hour to go.

[laurenmarlowe]

Too darned funny!!

[luvie]

...you always have to be cooler than me. But, that's okay--it really felt good here.

My can opener is not dangerous--it is a left-handed one, just for me! :o) A friend found it for me--the friend who comes every weekend.

You keep talkin' about cookin'--I just have to be there sometimes when you are!

[Army Air Corps]

Yeah, 39 sold out to the WB. There are very few truly indy TV stations left. No, I am not reallygetting on a soapbox, per se. It is just kinds sad to see that kind of local flavour (in terms of lineup and station personality) fade.