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Freeper Canteen: Tell me your favorite joke! Come join us. April 12,2005
Canteen funny guys

Posted on 04/11/2005 7:30:08 PM PDT by Diva Betsy Ross

For the freedom you enjoyed yesterday... Thank the Veterans who served in The United States Armed Forces.

Looking forward to tomorrow's freedom? Support The United States Armed Forces Today!

You know how it is when you're walking up the stairs, and you get to the top, and you think there's one more step? I'm like that all the time.

Yesterday I saw a chicken crossing the road. I asked it why. It told me it was none of my business

Here is the big question of the day: What is your favorite joke? (please keep it family friendly!) Come into the Canteen and tell us all about it!~

Links below! Wanna surf the internet with me?

I hope that you will find some fun,enlightenment and inspiration within these links. If you are really cool you will follow each one! I hope everyone has a great week. And of course thanks and love goes out to the troops. You guys and gals rock! Thank you-Thank you 100 thousand times!

Find Out If You Are a Road Geek Here

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Slogan Generator Here

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A Very Funny WebSite Here

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Experiments for Hostess Twinkies

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USO Public Service Announcement

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Are we having fun yet?? Hope so!

Support Our Troops Rally Ohio

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Motorcycle News

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Some Income is TAX FREE for Troops!

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Free Video Conferencing online for Troops

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Movies Released April 2005

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Faith Flashes-A Tribute to our Troops

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Tribute to Our Troops

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Looking for a special card to send a special American hero? LOOK HERE!

"Lord, hold our troops in your loving hands. Protect them as they protect us. Bless them and their families for the selfless acts they perform for us in our time of need. Amen."

AWESOME TRIBUTE AND PRAYER WHEEL FOR OUR TROOPS AND THEIR FAMILIES HERE (Make sure to look at the second page)



TOPICS: Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: 229; jokes; military; supportourtroops
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To: tomkow6; cedarswingman
((LOL))Good morning, tomkow6.

Not much happening around here. Getting ready for the Windows deal today and my birthday tommorow.

301 posted on 04/12/2005 5:09:41 AM PDT by E.G.C.
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To: CelticLass; bentfeather

How can you tell which tricycle belongs to the blonde?
It is the one with the kickstand.


302 posted on 04/12/2005 5:10:08 AM PDT by tomkow6 (...................hot DOG!........)
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To: EHC Southern Pride

Morning to you southern Pride. Hope you enjoy your time at the beach.


303 posted on 04/12/2005 5:10:36 AM PDT by cedarswingman (One man with courage makes a majority)
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To: cedarswingman

What do you call an all-blond skydiving team?
A new version of the Lawn Darts game.


304 posted on 04/12/2005 5:11:49 AM PDT by tomkow6 (...................hot DOG!........)
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To: EHC Southern Pride

ROFLMBO


305 posted on 04/12/2005 5:12:05 AM PDT by cedarswingman (One man with courage makes a majority)
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To: CelticLass

You want to laugh? Watch this video if you have high speed access that is. http://video.mpegnation.com/a001479716638032605111933458.html


306 posted on 04/12/2005 5:12:25 AM PDT by Conspiracy Guy (NASSA put the first men on the moon, September 31, 1966.)
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To: GodBlessUSA

Some of it. I have been working on my shop mostly.
How have you been?


307 posted on 04/12/2005 5:13:39 AM PDT by cedarswingman (One man with courage makes a majority)
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To: Diva Betsy Ross; Kathy in Alaska; beachn4fun; tomkow6; uncleshag; CelticLass; pelikan; StarCMC; ...
Good morning Canteeners and Cubers!! I'm still chuckling loudly from my findings which resulted from entering "Hold Muh Beer" in FR search window!


308 posted on 04/12/2005 5:14:11 AM PDT by NRA1995 ("The Minuteman Project: doing the job our government doesn't want to do")
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To: Diva Betsy Ross; tomkow6; 68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub; Kathy in Alaska; bentfeather; Bethbg79; ...

Good morning Everyone. Good morning to our

Military, our Allies and their families. THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO!

Thank you Diva Betsy for preparing the Canteen for the day. Of course, you know it is going to take me all day to read every one of these jokes and check out your links? I just don't know how I'm going to get any work done.

Well, we had a cold evening last night and I had to turn the heat back on. Today, we are only going to get into the 50s. Sweater day!

You'll have to excuse me for now; there are so many jokes and I want to read as many as possible. I've already seen a few "belly-busters" and am anxious to read more.

I will be posting one that I have always liked right after this. So, keep your eyes focused this way.

But, you stay right where you are. Don't touch that dial. Don't change that channel. Put down that remote. Don't leave the room. Keep your eyes on your monitor. Cause...............I'll be bock!

Now remember, the Canteen is

So, come on in and sit for a while. There's alway plenty of coffee, pancakes, conversation, silliness, and plain old BS


309 posted on 04/12/2005 5:14:32 AM PDT by beachn4fun ("Resistance is futile, but I may be placated with chocolates")
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To: beachn4fun

Why did it take the blond a whole week to wash three basement windows?
It took her six days just to dig the holes to put the ladder in.


310 posted on 04/12/2005 5:16:25 AM PDT by tomkow6 (...................hot DOG!........)
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To: E.G.C.

In case I forget, H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y


311 posted on 04/12/2005 5:17:08 AM PDT by cedarswingman (One man with courage makes a majority)
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To: radu

Did you hear about the blond who gave his cat a bath?
He still hasn't gotten all the hair off his tongue.


312 posted on 04/12/2005 5:17:54 AM PDT by tomkow6 (...................hot DOG!........)
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To: tomkow6
Blonde on horseback (Oldie but goodie)

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.

In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune, the Wal-Mart manager sees her and shuts the horse off.

313 posted on 04/12/2005 5:19:30 AM PDT by beachn4fun ("Resistance is futile, but I may be placated with chocolates")
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To: cedarswingman
I've been great. Thanks! I did so much yard work last week. Maybe your comment about working outside spurred me on. It was beautiful last week. Still nice out but too cold. Don't work to hard, Cedar :)
314 posted on 04/12/2005 5:20:01 AM PDT by GodBlessUSA (US Troops, past, present and future, God Bless You and Thank You! Prayers said for our Heroes!)
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To: cedarswingman

Morning Sweetie. Missed you yesterday.


315 posted on 04/12/2005 5:21:20 AM PDT by beachn4fun ("Resistance is futile, but I may be placated with chocolates")
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To: GodBlessUSA

Good morning GBU


316 posted on 04/12/2005 5:21:37 AM PDT by beachn4fun ("Resistance is futile, but I may be placated with chocolates")
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To: beachn4fun
Good Morning Beachn!

Image hosted by TinyPic.com

317 posted on 04/12/2005 5:22:15 AM PDT by GodBlessUSA (US Troops, past, present and future, God Bless You and Thank You! Prayers said for our Heroes!)
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To: CelticLass
Remember this one?

PREGNANCY Q & A & more!

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?

A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?

A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.

A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?

A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?

A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?

A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?

A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?

A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?

A: When the kids are in college.

318 posted on 04/12/2005 5:23:55 AM PDT by beachn4fun ("Resistance is futile, but I may be placated with chocolates")
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To: beachn4fun; 68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub; Radix; Kathy in Alaska; MoJo2001; LaDivaLoca; Fawnn; ...









Two hunters from Arkansas got a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. They bagged six.

As they started loading the plane for the return trip, the pilot said the plane could take only four moose. The two objected strongly. "Last year we shot six, and the pilot let us put them all on board; he had the same plane as yours."

Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. However, even on full power, the little plane couldn't handle the load and went down a few moments after take-off.

Climbing out of the wreck one hunter asked the other, "Any idea where we are?"

"Yaaah I think we's pretty close to where we crashed last year."



319 posted on 04/12/2005 5:25:39 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (TV News and the MSM - - - ROTFLMAO)
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To: beachn4fun

How does a psychic refer to a blonde?
Light reading.


320 posted on 04/12/2005 5:25:53 AM PDT by tomkow6 (...................hot DOG!........)
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