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Fart-Suppressing Seat Cushion Keeps Air Clean At Tailgates
NCBuy.com ^ | November 12, 2004 | Wireless Flash Weird News

Posted on 11/13/2004 9:41:41 AM PST by MississippiMasterpiece

GREENVILLE, N.C. (Wireless Flash) -- A new product is helping tailgate party poopers keep their rear end slips to themselves.

The GasBGon company is launching a line of flatulence filtering seat cushions specifically for tailgate parties at sporting events.

The cushion helps eliminate the sound and stinky smell that comes from "the cheer from the rear" by muffling the toot with acoustical foam and trapping the rank fumes with a carbon filter.

Since "everyone passes gas" and tailgating is an "opportune time" for brew and food to make a combustible mix, product co-inventor Jim Huza says the fart suppressor is perfect for keeping gas from flying around sports aficionados.

Huza says the cushion -- which costs $24.95 -- fits all shapes and sizes and can withstand all kinds of farts from small toots to big wind breakers.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events; US: North Carolina
KEYWORDS: falloftheromanempire; fartcushion; fartfilter; fartsuppressor; romanorgies; stadiumcushion; stadiumcushions; stadiumseat; stadiumseats; tailgating
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Something about this story smells...
1 posted on 11/13/2004 9:41:42 AM PST by MississippiMasterpiece
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

Takes all the fun out of it!


2 posted on 11/13/2004 9:42:46 AM PST by Nov3 ("This is the best election night in history." --DNC chair Terry McAuliffe Nov. 2,2004 8p.m.)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

3 posted on 11/13/2004 9:44:56 AM PST by billorites (freepo ergo sum)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

I would buy this if it amplified the sound.


4 posted on 11/13/2004 9:45:09 AM PST by Cult of Personality
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

I love American ingenuity....this ranks right up there with the crapper.....invented in turn by John Crapper of England.


5 posted on 11/13/2004 9:45:55 AM PST by squirt-gun
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To: MississippiMasterpiece
I can imagine the product testing!
'OK, broccoli, beans & crabcakes for dinner last night'...
'Quick, someone pull my finger!'
6 posted on 11/13/2004 9:45:59 AM PST by 45semi (A Kennedy speaking, and the wind from me arse, bear suspicious resemblance...)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

Do they make something to cover a Democrats pie hole ?


7 posted on 11/13/2004 9:46:22 AM PST by LesbianThespianGymnasticMidget (The Jews Stole My Oxygen... (even though my compound was well airated) heh)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

8 posted on 11/13/2004 9:47:01 AM PST by billorites (freepo ergo sum)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece
"We don't want your steenkin' cushions"
9 posted on 11/13/2004 9:47:45 AM PST by uncleshag (Send the light !)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece
That would take all the fun out of an SBD*

Nam Vet

10 posted on 11/13/2004 9:48:17 AM PST by Nam Vet (MSM reporters think the MOIST dream they had the night before is a "reliable source".)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

I suppose a tailgate party would be the only acceptable place to use one of these- imagine the stigma created by hauling your GasBGon seat cushion into church with you. It would "clear out the pew" in more ways than one.


11 posted on 11/13/2004 9:49:03 AM PST by fat city (Julius Rosenberg's soviet code name was "Liberal")
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

Do they make them in Extra Large for Hillary?


12 posted on 11/13/2004 9:49:22 AM PST by april15Bendovr
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

Hi, I'm John Kerry. I received three Purple Farts, errr, uhhm, hearts. Did you know I was in Viet Nam?


13 posted on 11/13/2004 9:49:25 AM PST by SGCOS
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To: LesbianThespianGymnasticMidget

Just think of the possibliities, we could make these for
COWS.....No more methane buildup, no more global warming,
Ozone hole reduced to zip, God Bless America!


14 posted on 11/13/2004 9:49:59 AM PST by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece
SBD = Silent But Deadly

Consistant with the Law of the Conservation of Energy, what a SBD lacks in audible qualities is more than compensated for in semi-lethal olfactory intensity. The mechanism responsible is usually the innocent-looking person suspiciously glancing about .

Nam Vet

15 posted on 11/13/2004 9:50:11 AM PST by Nam Vet (MSM reporters think the MOIST dream they had the night before is a "reliable source".)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

This should be posted in Breaking News...err...wind...err...nevermind. ;^)


16 posted on 11/13/2004 9:52:23 AM PST by Balata
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To: MississippiMasterpiece

Well, that sure puts an end to the old "pull my finger" routine.


17 posted on 11/13/2004 9:52:38 AM PST by Fiddlstix (This Tagline for sale. (Presented by TagLines R US))
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To: tet68



lol!

"Sit, Bessie, sit!"


18 posted on 11/13/2004 9:53:49 AM PST by uncleshag (Send the light !)
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To: MississippiMasterpiece
Something about this story smells...

This device won't work. The emission of the superheated methosulfate air would rise. Maybe a charcoal filtered scarf would be more effective.

19 posted on 11/13/2004 9:54:12 AM PST by Cult of Personality
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To: Cult of Personality

You forget about the particulate matter.


20 posted on 11/13/2004 9:55:39 AM PST by ScottM1968
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