A Few Of FR's Finest....Every Day....12-02-03...Holiday Contest Thread: Rumsfield Doll

12/02/003 | FreeTheHostages

[FreeTheHostages]

A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day

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HARK! Welcome to a holiday contest thread.

The prize is a talking doll. But wait, it gets better!
	Secretary Rumsfield is doing the talking! Ah, Rummy, he tells it like it is.  Click here to see a sample of things the doll can say!

Santa sees all, knows all.     Cool Christmas gifts for Rumsfield?   You betcha.  But here’s a more perplexing question: Whatever will Rummy get for the press corps?


How does Donald Rumsfield really feel about THEM?  He probably can't say.   The press corps, being the inexperienced, naive, childlike people that they are, may determine how much Rumsfield really loves them by the Christmas gift he gives them.


So, let's do some fictitious shopping for our beloved Secretary of Defense.  Pretend the President has given you leave to get them what you *really* want to get them.  Best answer wins the doll!

Examples of Gifts From Rummy, To Press Corps, With Luv
Recompense for their thoughts	A Texas snowglobe?
A good gift for Sam Donaldson	Remember, it's the thought that counts . . .
Got the idea?  Good.  So it's your turn: what should Secretary Rumsfield get for his beloved crop of youngsters in the Pentagon press room?

The Rules
1. There are no rules! Everything is subject to change on the merest whim. Needless to say, this contest is not affiliated with the ownership of Free Republic and is run by just me.


The Guidelines
1. Post by 22:00 hours (10 p.m. EST --Rumsfield-time!) your description of what Rumsfield should get for the Fourth Estate.  In this fictious gift-giving contest, you can use words, graphics, sounds, and/or an unlimited ficitious budget.  Your contest entry can describe a gift to the entire press corps or you can select one member to receive Sec. Rumsfield’s gift.

2. Winner will be announced on this thread at 23:00 hours.

3. Humor counts.   Conservatism counts.   Picking on the artwork of The Thin Man counts.   In short, everything counts.   Including how much alcohol I have imbibed at the time of judging.   Oh, and if you have to ask if bribes count, then you don't know me well enough to get me the perfect gift anyway.

4. As always, no complaining that the judge (me) is a raving lunatic.   Everyone already knows that.   Bor-r-r-r-ing.   As per last year, no whining if you lose just ‘cause your entry was clearly better: remember, when the judge is an idiot, there’s no shame in losing.   So enter once, enter often, have a ball.

5. The possibility exists of runner-up prizes and awards.   The possibility also exists that if you don’t want a the Rumsfield doll and would prefer a Coulter doll, I just might have access to one for ya.  Or not.  Depends on my mood, really.

6. Don't post anything that our President and First Lady would disapprove of.


7. Oh, and no not entering because you're afraid of embarassing yourself.  That's the entire point of these contests and you'll have plenty of company!  Ho ho ho!





Just in case you're not motivated and somehow have lost the dander you usually put up when you see a member of the press corps, consider the fact that the ne'er-do-wells just yesterday gave TONS of cnn.com frontpage publicity to a "foot-in-mouth" award for Rumsfield given by a couple of unknown British quacks.  Unbelievably, the press corps is riding herd on the theory that the man can't talk no good!  We, on the other hand, understand perfectly this gem:

We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know.   But there are also unknown unknowns -- the ones we don't know we don't know.

It makes perfect sense to everyone except a Liberal and we recognize the Rumsfieldian humor and truth in the statement.  I personally hope this contest has many unknown unknowns!

And Merry Christmas, Secretary Rumsfield!  We understand you and you've been a very good boy this year!

THIS WEEK'S THREADS 12-1-03...Military Monday

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[Donaeus]

A portable lie detector they wear at all times...painful jolt when they lie, and a pleasure jolt when they are truthful...Of course, the gift won't be perfect because it does nothing to correct their stupidity.

I think we have a winner!!! This is something we can all enjoy. We will know at all times whether or not they're telling the truth by the expression on their face. The fact that it doesn't correct their stupidity means we'll appreciate this gift much, much more than they will. *grinning mischeviously* Heheheheh. Pure genius I tell you!

[FreeTheHostages]

That would be so generous of Rumsfield!

[FreeTheHostages]

Ah, Cal, it's so kind of you to team with Pippin! :) But how would we share the doll? Would you want the top half or the bottom half? hee hee

[FreeTheHostages]

Wow, not too shabby! Applause, applause. Good list.

[SpookBrat]

Here is a gift which CANNOT be passed up. Now you too can help wipe away the United Nations with your own roll of UNTP for only $4.95. Wouldn't it be a great stocking stuffer?

ROFL (I love these threads. They're so much fun).

[MeekOneGOP]

hehe! Mornin' ! ...

I'm gonna work on what Rummy can give the media for Christmas pic.
All I can say about it right now is ....

Bwahahahahahaha !!

[SpookBrat]

Very Solomon like question for you to ask. LOL

[MeekOneGOP]

LOL ! Funny ! I have my other brand available too ...

[SpookBrat]

I like it! Is there a noose around the neck?

[SpookBrat]

I don't think I want her touching my family's bottom. We prefer softer tissue. But hey, if it's rough, give it to the press. Yeah! Good idea. Rough toilet paper for the press!

[Donaeus]

Good morning everyone!! Looks like we already have lots of great entries to this contest, I'm really gonna have to put my thinking cap on!!! Hope it's a good day for everybody.

Nice to meet you Waterdragon, longcut and thumperusn!! :) Welcome to FR's Finest thumperusn, glad to have you here. Thanks to both of you for defending our freedom and bringing it to the Iraqi people. My prayers are with you and your families. God bless you. God bless President Bush and God bless America!!!

[FreeTheHostages]

Ah, another excellent gift. I do hope someone from the Department of Defense's press office is taking notes . . . .

[FreeTheHostages]

Thanks, glad you like the skating Santa. I confess all these graphics were stolen from last year's holiday threads, but remixed in a new and interesting way. Hee hee.

[FreeTheHostages]

Good points.

[MeekOneGOP]

LOL ! Great bumper stickers !

[Calpernia]

Pips reading room is from Pips. I stand by my straight jacket! I was going to post a funny pic of Wednesday's doll from the Addams Family in reference to this: "But how would we share the doll? Would you want the top half or the bottom half?" But I have to go find my husband now. He just called with a dead battery.

Be back to see more funny posts later!

[SpookBrat]

I have this wicked fantasy.....maybe I'll do it next year. Get a stock pile of Republican stickers and slap them on Democrat cars. Could I be arrested for vandalism? *wicked grin*

[MeekOneGOP]

LOL !

I can't wait to get started on my little pic creation idea to come together. Something Rummy can give the media. (I hope it comes out okay) ...

I'm heading over to my PhotoDeluxe in a few minutes and get started. So if I duck out for a while, ya'll will know I'm up to something, lol !

[MeekOneGOP]

ha! ha!

[MeekOneGOP]

See ya'll in little bit with my Rummy 'surprise' for the media ...