Free Republic Smokers' Lounge

1 posted on 08/29/2003 3:29:57 PM PDT by Just another Joe

To: *puff_list; red-dawg; Fiddlstix; RikaStrom; robomatik; ladyinred; error99; Max McGarrity; Gabz; ...

2 posted on 08/29/2003 3:30:44 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

To: Just another Joe

3 posted on 08/29/2003 3:31:47 PM PDT by Argh

Hey Argh, how's things up north?

4 posted on 08/29/2003 3:35:16 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

5 posted on 08/29/2003 3:36:07 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

To: Just another Joe

The usual socialist crap. And pretty hot for this part of the world. Plus I've got a headache I've got to do something about when I get out of here. I don't even have a joke for you today! I hope things are better with you. See you later!

6 posted on 08/29/2003 3:38:02 PM PDT by Argh

To: Just another Joe

Hah! Maybe later, right now it'll just exacerbate the headache. Thanks, though.

7 posted on 08/29/2003 3:38:51 PM PDT by Argh

8 posted on 08/29/2003 3:41:43 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

To: Just another Joe; Argh

Hi, Joe! Can I have a Miller Lite, please? I've got time for a quick one while my fire in the grill gets ready for steaks. Got plans for the Labor Day weekend? Hubby had to work in the office in the city today, and he called me from the middle of some accident/traffic jam on the highway on the way home, so he's running late.

9 posted on 08/29/2003 4:01:40 PM PDT by Texan5

To: Just another Joe

Hellooooooo???? Man, this place is empty tonight! Just returned from seeing the French painting exhibition (from the Walters Museum in Baltimore) at the Nelson Atkins Museum here in KC...wonderful. Altho, I oil paint as a hobby, so I probably enjoyed it more than most.

Let's hope the above mentioned car accident doesn't turn out like this one:

Mrs. Jones gets a call from the hospital.
> They tell her that her husband's been in a terrible
> car accident. She rushes to the hospital, runs in to
> the ER and says her husband's been in an accident.
>
> They tell her Dr. Smith is handling the case.
> They page the doctor. He comes out to the waiting
> room to see a terribly upset Mrs. Jones.
>
> "Mrs. Jones?" the doctor asks.
>
> "Yes sir, what's happened? How is my husband?"
>
> The doctor sits next to her and says, "Not good news.
> Your husband's accident resulted in two fractures of his
> spine."
> "Oh my God" says Mrs. Jones, "what will be his prognosis?"
>
> "Well, Mrs. Jones, his vital signs are stable.
> However, his spine is inoperable. He'll have no motor skills or capability. This means you will have to feed him."
>
> Mrs. Jones begins to sob. "And you'll have to turn him in
> his bed every two hours to prevent pneumonia."
>
> Mrs. Jones begins to wail and cry loudly.
>
> "Then, of course," the doctor continued, "you'll have to
> diaper him as he'll have no control over his bladder and
> of course these diapers must be changed at least five
> times a day."
>
> Mrs. Jones begins to shake as she cries, sobs, wails.
>
> The doctor continues: "And you'll have to clean up his
> feces on a regular basis as he'll have no control over
> his sphincter. His bowel will engorge whenever and quite
> often I'm afraid. Of course you must clean him
> immediately to avoid accumulation of the putrid effluent
> he'll be emitting regularly."
>
> Now Mrs. Jones is convulsing sobbing uncontrollably
> and beginning to wither off the bench into a sobbing
> pitiful mass.
>
> Just then Dr. Smith reaches out his hand and pats
> Mrs. Jones on the shoulder.
>
> "Hey, I'm just fucking with you, he's dead."

10 posted on 08/29/2003 4:24:01 PM PDT by SandyEgo

To: Just another Joe

Better late than never, I guess!!!!!!!!!!!

11 posted on 08/29/2003 4:37:08 PM PDT by Gabz (anti-smokers - personification of everything wrong in this country.)

Probably not soon enough but like Gabz says, better late than never.

12 posted on 08/29/2003 4:44:16 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

Hmmmmmm, the doctor would be dead too.
How are you, Sandy?

13 posted on 08/29/2003 4:44:50 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

Can I help it that the upgrade in the lab didn't go as smoothly as they promised me?

14 posted on 08/29/2003 4:45:25 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

To: Texan5; Just another Joe

Boy oh boy did we get a deal today!!!!!!!!!!

Actually a few of them.

Before we went to our normal Friday watering hole I wanted to go to the thrift shop that is run by the food bank - the winter coat I picked up for Jax is worth more than the $22 we spent. And both hubby and Jax got lots of stuff.

At the register we got into a conversation with the cashier about chicken (how and why I have no recall)....long story short, with our receipt and change she handed us a slip of paper that had the word chicken written on it and told us to go around the far side of the building and get some.

What we thought we probably be a few pounds of leg quarters turned out to be a crate of Perdue Oven stuffers - and one of the food Bank employees was trying to convince us to take the other crate.

We gave 6 of them to our 2 favorite bartenders, have 10 in the freezer and 1 for tomorrow's dinner. At beter than 3 and a half pounds each and generally $1.49 a pound - I'm sitting pretty!!!

15 posted on 08/29/2003 4:53:01 PM PDT by Gabz (anti-smokers - personification of everything wrong in this country.)

To: Just another Joe

I was talking about me - not you!!!!!!!!

16 posted on 08/29/2003 4:59:43 PM PDT by Gabz (anti-smokers - personification of everything wrong in this country.)

Whoo baby, chicken for weeks.

heh heh

17 posted on 08/29/2003 5:09:37 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

I was talking about me - not you!!!!!!!!

Oh. OK. Ignore my comment, I opened up at 10:00 AM Eastern time.
(will she buy it?)

18 posted on 08/29/2003 5:11:18 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

To: Just another Joe

Hi bye I'm diving drunk right now.

19 posted on 08/29/2003 5:16:26 PM PDT by Conspiracy Guy (Of course I like it here. I just may not like you.)

I'm diving drunk right now.

Just don't forget to look at your wrist chronometer.

20 posted on 08/29/2003 5:20:31 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)

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