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Blonde Jokes?

Posted on 11/09/2001 6:10:58 PM PST by Lower55

Any blonde jokes to lighten up the mood?


TOPICS: Humor
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1 posted on 11/09/2001 6:10:58 PM PST by Lower55
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To: Lower55
I think Lawyer jokes would be safer....
2 posted on 11/09/2001 6:13:53 PM PST by Dallas
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To: Dallas
I think you might be right!
3 posted on 11/09/2001 6:15:34 PM PST by Lower55
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To: Lower55
Do you know why Blonde Jokes are all one-liners?

It's so us men can understand them.

4 posted on 11/09/2001 6:19:10 PM PST by mfulstone
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To: Dallas
I'm a blonde and know ALL the jokes. Ethnic jokes are much funnier. Real blondes are very intelligent. It's the fake blondes that everyone makes fun of. Deal with your hair color sweeties, it matches your skin tone.
5 posted on 11/09/2001 6:19:42 PM PST by nagdt
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To: Dallas
How about blonde lawyers?
6 posted on 11/09/2001 6:19:48 PM PST by ObfusGate
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To: Lower55
You know why they're using blonde lawyers to replace white rats in laboratories? There's more of them, and you don't get attached to them.
7 posted on 11/09/2001 6:19:55 PM PST by Reweld
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To: Lower55
Being a blonde, here's one of my favorites:

Three blondes were walking down the beach when they found a bottle in the surf. While rubbing off the sand, a genie suddenly appeared. "For freeing me, I will grant you each one wish" he said.

The first blonde says "I want to be 50% smarter". Poof, and when the smoke cleared the genie had turned her into a red-head.

The second blonde says "Well then, I want to be 100% smarter". Poof and when the smoke cleared, the genie had turned her into a brunette.

Feeling confused the third blonde says "Well, I want to be 100% dumber". Poof, and when the smoke cleared the genie had turned her into.......a MAN!

8 posted on 11/09/2001 6:23:18 PM PST by Aerohawk
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To: Lower55
An expectant blonde, brunette, and a red-head were in the waiting room eagerly awaiting their first sonograms. The brunette leans over and quietly says to the red-head, "I just know I'm going to have a little girl...I read a book that says if a woman is on the bottom, and stays on her back afterwards, the chances of her conceiving a girl are greatly increased!"

The red-head blushes, and whispers back, saying, "Really, then I'm going to have a boy, 'cause I rode on top the whole time."

The two ladies notice the blonde weeping quietly to herself. Completely sympathetic with the hormonal complexities of pregnancy, the brunette and red-head seek to console her, and ask what's wrong.

The blonde chokes over her sobbing, "I, I ...think I'm going to have....puppies!"

9 posted on 11/09/2001 6:24:55 PM PST by Joe 6-pack
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To: Joe 6-pack
A blonde and a brunette walking down the street in town. Without warning the blonde just turned and ran into a Starbucks coffee shop. The brunette caught up and said "Are you hurt?"
10 posted on 11/09/2001 6:29:24 PM PST by Lower55
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To: Joe 6-pack
What is a blonde's idea of safe sex? Locking the car door.
11 posted on 11/09/2001 6:29:36 PM PST by Satadru
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To: Joe 6-pack
OK I'll bite, too.

Q: How do you get a blonde on the roof?
A: Tell her free drinks are on the house.

Q: What do a blonde and a 747 have in commmon?
A: They both have black boxes.

Q: Why should blondes work seven days a week?
A: So you don't have to retrain them again on Monday.

Q: What does a blonde say after sex?
A: Who are you guys?

(Teflon flame-retardant suit going on...)

12 posted on 11/09/2001 6:30:11 PM PST by Looking4Truth
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To: Joe 6-pack
The difference between a blonde and a washing machine: You can drop a load in a washing machine and it won't follow you around for two weeks.
13 posted on 11/09/2001 6:31:06 PM PST by Lower55
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Comment #14 Removed by Moderator

To: Aerohawk
THAT's a good one! Thanks!
15 posted on 11/09/2001 6:32:48 PM PST by nagdt
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To: overseer5
Difference between a blonde and a computer: You only have to punch information into a computer one time.
16 posted on 11/09/2001 6:32:57 PM PST by Lower55
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To: Lower55
Q: Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?
A: So they know that toes go in first.
17 posted on 11/09/2001 6:34:19 PM PST by rintense
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To: overseer5
These are dirty. Any clean blonde jokes? They're funnier. Well there's the old:

Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been working on the computer?
A: The screen has white-out on it.

18 posted on 11/09/2001 6:35:36 PM PST by Looking4Truth
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To: Dallas
Two blondes were walking in the woods and came upon a set of tracks. One blonde said, 'These are deer tracks'. The other one said, 'No, these are moose tracks.' They stood their arguing until the train hit them.
19 posted on 11/09/2001 6:35:39 PM PST by rintense
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To: Lower55; Looking4Truth
And the truth of the matter is each and every one of us would probably do ANYTHING an attractive blonde asked us to...without thinking.

Admit it...

20 posted on 11/09/2001 6:36:26 PM PST by Joe 6-pack
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