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Elizabeth Warren Proudly Displays Scalp Of Spirit Airlines
The Bee ^ | May 4, 2026 | The Bee

Posted on 05/05/2026 9:30:50 AM PDT by dayglored

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senator Elizabeth Warren was seen riding into town Monday morning bearing the scalp of her defeated enemy, Spirit Airlines.

The senator from Massachusetts previously opposed a merger between JetBlue and Spirit Airlines, arguing that Spirit Airlines "made mockery of Great Spirit" and only its defeat would "bring'em return of buffalo."

"Me no make'em deal with palefaces," Warren said at the time. "Call for anti-trust. Me anti-trust white man."

At the time, others argued in favor of the merger, saying it would save thousands of jobs and enable the two budget airlines to join forces against the "Big Four" — American, Delta, United, and Southwest Airlines — to increase competition in the industry.

Nevertheless, Warren persisted with the heart of a fierce brave.

With the merger dissolved, Warren reportedly waited patiently for the business to weaken before she pounced on it with a band of warriors who slew it with many arrows. Sources confirmed Warren let out a chilling "death whoop" as she scalped the airline.

"Injun justice!" Warren cried out, raising the scalp aloft as she rode back into D.C.

At publishing time, Warren had mounted the scalp in her office as a warning to other white man businesses.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; elizabethwarren; satire; spiritairlines

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Searching for an audio recording of her "Death Whoop".

On second thought, maybe I'll skip that....

1 posted on 05/05/2026 9:30:50 AM PDT by dayglored
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To: dayglored

Makum much wampum. getum fire water for Chief Pelosi.


2 posted on 05/05/2026 9:43:09 AM PDT by Dr. Sivana ("Whatsoever he shall say to you, do ye." (John 2:5))
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To: dayglored

“Elizabeth Warren Proudly Displays Scalp Of Spirit Airlines”. I wonder how much money she made on this deal.


3 posted on 05/05/2026 10:06:10 AM PDT by kawhill (Dywedwch Wrthbym because + Add translation Welsh-English dictionary 'Tell Us')
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To: dayglored

I find it interesting that the visuals of a good many (if not the majority) of pathetic lib women match the fugliness of their mentality.

Let us remember that this laughable ‘woman’ got a law degree. This speaks volumes on the ‘standards’ of that ‘Law Skool’.

Then one can let one’s mind wonder to the ‘standards’ of the state that allowed such a loser to run for office, let alone win.

Oh, Massachusetts. Never mind.


4 posted on 05/05/2026 10:16:51 AM PDT by Da Coyote
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To: kawhill

Liawatha speak with forked tongue!🍴


5 posted on 05/05/2026 10:26:03 AM PDT by 9422WMR
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To: dayglored

Everyone of the people that lost their job should send her a nasty letter


6 posted on 05/05/2026 10:37:37 AM PDT by butlerweave (Fateh)
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To: dayglored

Me thinkum ex Spirit employees might go on warpath with Grey Beaver, union, Dem, or no.

The airlines are already chomping at the bit to jack up prices regardless of fuel prices. Secondary markets will take the brunt of it.


7 posted on 05/05/2026 10:41:23 AM PDT by The Antiyuppie (When small men cast long shadows, it is near the end of the day.)
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To: dayglored

This call-um for much firewater!


8 posted on 05/05/2026 10:58:44 AM PDT by bigbob (We are all Charlie Kirk now)
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To: 9422WMR
> Liawatha speak with forked tongue!🍴

It's the mating call of the Princess Grey Beaver.

9 posted on 05/05/2026 11:30:37 AM PDT by dayglored (This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalms 118:24)
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To: dayglored

10 posted on 05/05/2026 12:27:15 PM PDT by Albion Wilde (The first duty of the American government is to protect American citizens, not illegal aliens. --DJT)
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