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11 Pickup Lines For Getting Chicks At A 'No Kings' Rally
babylonbee.com ^ | March 30, 2026

Posted on 03/30/2026 1:10:58 PM PDT by V_TWIN

Babylon Bee Join Toggle navigation menu Banner Ad 11 Pickup Lines For Getting Chicks At A 'No Kings' Rally Politics · Mar 30, 2026 · BabylonBee.com Ashlin Galbraith / Shutterstock Image for article: 11 Pickup Lines For Getting Chicks At A 'No Kings' Rally Banner Ad A "No Kings" rally isn't just an excuse to take off work while protesting a thing that doesn't exist in America — it's also a great way to find love. Knowing what the chicks at a "No Kings" protest want to hear is the key.

The Babylon Bee spent the weekend compiling the most popular lines used to pick up chicks at the "No Kings" rallies across the country:

"I also hate Trump, and I can't coherently explain why." It's important to point out what you have in common.

"Are your Birkenstocks making your feet sore? Because you've been running through my mind all day." It goes a long way to compliment her on her fashion style.

"Hey, there. Do you identify as a woman?" Misgendering right off the bat can kill your chances.

"We should set up a play date for our vegan trans cats." Sometimes, the quickest way to a girl's heart is through her non-binary pets.

"I don't want to brag, but I once bench pressed 20 pounds." Guaranteed to impress.

"What's your favorite episode of The View?" Once she finds out you love listening to screeching harpies, you're in.

"No kings, but YAS QUEEN, am I right?" You smooth operator, you.

"I love the way the wind blows through your pink and green hair." Let her know that you find her attractive.

"I couldn't help but notice your insane screaming from across the street." Nothing wrong with a little sweet-talking.

"Want to go grab an oat milk latte and avocado toast after the rally?" Thoughtful and romantic.

"You're the most beautiful woman I've seen since Hillary Clinton." Once you drop this baby on her, she'll be yours.

Use any of the lines listed above at the next "No Kings" rally, and you're guaranteed to find your soulmate. Which other pick-up lines do you think would be most effective?


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; eww; nokings

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1 posted on 03/30/2026 1:10:58 PM PDT by V_TWIN
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To: V_TWIN
"I don't want to brag, but I once bench pressed 20 pounds."

Her reply: "Ewww. Gross. I hate big muscles"

2 posted on 03/30/2026 1:24:18 PM PDT by Gil4 (And the trees are all kept equal by hatchet, ax and saw)
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To: V_TWIN

This actually isn’t satire. I can’t tell you how many guys I’ve talked to that during the 60s they didn’t give a damn about the protest. They just went to score with the hippie chicks.


3 posted on 03/30/2026 1:24:59 PM PDT by wrcase
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To: wrcase

At least hippy chicks were thin.


4 posted on 03/30/2026 1:31:26 PM PDT by kosciusko51
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To: V_TWIN

“Hey, Girl! Did you knit that Code Pink hat yourself? Would you teach me how to knit?”


5 posted on 03/30/2026 1:41:03 PM PDT by Diana in Wisconsin (I don't have, 'Hobbies.' I'm developing a robust Post-Apocalyptic skill set.)
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To: V_TWIN

“I only date women with a penis”
“Is that a geritol in your pocket or are you just happy to see me”


6 posted on 03/30/2026 1:43:53 PM PDT by Organic Panic ('Was I molested. I think so' - Ashley Biden)
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To: V_TWIN

From what I’ve seen of progressive protesters, they’re of one of two kinds -—they’re either likely to be man haters, or they’re desperate and will follow any man who acts only mildly interested.


7 posted on 03/30/2026 1:49:48 PM PDT by Flaming Conservative ((Pray without ceasing))
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To: V_TWIN

Why would anyone want to?


8 posted on 03/30/2026 1:50:18 PM PDT by Savage Beast (When the student is ready, the teacher appears. When the people are ready, the hero appears.)
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To: V_TWIN

12 “ you deserve me, so... my gender is your choice ! “

( Arrogance AND Submissive , the perfect oxymoron )


9 posted on 03/30/2026 1:51:54 PM PDT by cuz1961
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To: Savage Beast

Some dudes will pork anything, they have no shame.


10 posted on 03/30/2026 1:53:53 PM PDT by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: V_TWIN

Just mention modern art, Civil Rights, or folk music and you’re in like Flynn.


11 posted on 03/30/2026 1:54:39 PM PDT by dfwgator ("I am Charlie Kirk!")
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To: dfwgator

Sure Otter 👌


12 posted on 03/30/2026 1:56:14 PM PDT by V_TWIN (America....so great even the people that hate it won't leave)
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To: V_TWIN

13 posted on 03/30/2026 1:57:19 PM PDT by plain talk
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To: V_TWIN

Thanks very much. 90 percent of the Bee articles are hilarious. We enjoy them a lot. And frankly we’re tired (at least for awhile) trying to correct some of the lies and distortions and enemy propaganda that’s spread online —- what utter rubbish! It just gets wearisome - gonna try taking a break from it and let the brainwashed (and useful idiots) deal with their problems by themselves for awhile.


14 posted on 03/30/2026 2:00:11 PM PDT by faithhopecharity ("Politicians aren't born, they're excreted." Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 to 43 BCE))
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To: plain talk

That’s Great! LOL!


15 posted on 03/30/2026 2:01:07 PM PDT by MotorCityBuck (Keep the Change You Filthy Animal !)
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To: faithhopecharity

Once in a while I’ll take a hiatus from FR for a week or two....sort of a mental-health break.

Same with the news.....overload can actually cause slight depression......in me anyway.


16 posted on 03/30/2026 2:05:07 PM PDT by V_TWIN (America....so great even the people that hate it won't leave)
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To: V_TWIN
"We should set up a play date for our vegan trans cats."

Hmmm, I'd never thought of it before, but I'd bet it's illegal for a vet to perform genital mutilation surgery on a cat.

17 posted on 03/30/2026 2:08:14 PM PDT by libertylover (The HBM (Has Been Media) is almost all AGENDA-DRIVEN and HATE-DRIVEN, not-truth driven.)
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To: V_TWIN

Better shout those lines. The ladies at those rallies look like they might have age-related hearing loss.


18 posted on 03/30/2026 2:08:32 PM PDT by chrisser (I lost my vaccine card in a tragic boating accident. )
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To: chrisser
The ladies at those rallies look like they might have age-related hearing loss.

One of the side effects (there are over 700 IRC) of the Fauci jab is neurological damage.

I ran into a recently retired Canadian preacher and made a comment but he said, "WAIT, I need to put in my hearing aid."

That's the second jabbed liberal that I know that has (probably) vaxxxxxxxxxxxxxine caused hearing loss. If Fauci could have just convinced them to get in line to get MORE boosters, Dr. Bill Gates could have easily met his depopulation goals.

19 posted on 03/30/2026 2:18:31 PM PDT by politicianslie (Gold is the money of kings, silver for gentlemen, barter for peasants, debt is money for slaves )
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To: libertylover

Oh just say the feline is trans even though it isn’t. It’s the virtue signalling that counts.


20 posted on 03/30/2026 2:20:37 PM PDT by xp38
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