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Starving African Children Raise Money To Feed Ariana Grande
BabylonBee.com ^ | 11/19/2025 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 11/19/2025 1:44:15 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum

https://babylonbee.com/news/starving-african-children-raise-money-to-feed-ariana-grande

MEKELLE, ETHIOPIA — Starving African children bravely banded together this week to raise money to feed singer and actress Ariana Grande.

The Feed Ariana Fund was established by 12-year-old Dawit Kebede, a starving child who lost both parents during the 2023 drought. He first became aware of Grande's predicament after a member of the World Food Programme (WFP) showed him one of her albums. "This woman needs the rice!" Kebede had allegedly exclaimed in his native tongue when he first saw her picture. "How is she still alive?"

Kebede was quick to gather local children to take up the cause of donating food to Grande. Many were hesitant, because of their own malnourishment, but once they saw a picture of the pop star they quickly sold all their possessions and donated all they have.

"She needs it more than we do," a sickly 8-year-old named Tsion Worku said. "I hope she writes many inspirational songs like 'Sweetener' in the future. It makes me think of food."

At publishing time, Ariana Grande received $50.00 from the Feed Ariana Fund. "Thank you to my therapists and gay people," she said, misreading the name of the Ethiopian nonprofit.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; satire

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1 posted on 11/19/2025 1:44:15 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

The girl is malnourished.


2 posted on 11/19/2025 2:05:58 PM PST by Blood of Tyrants (No Jesus. No Peace.... Know Jesus. Know peace.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

That is a picture of anorexia nervosa.


3 posted on 11/19/2025 2:29:19 PM PST by ConservativeMind (Trump: Befuddling Democrats, Republicans, and the Media for the benefit of the US and all mankind.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Her stage name should be Ariana peque~na, or Ariana parva.


4 posted on 11/19/2025 2:49:02 PM PST by scrabblehack
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To: ConservativeMind

Geez woman, eat a biscuit or something. Anything.


5 posted on 11/19/2025 2:58:06 PM PST by healy61
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

She was always small, but she used to look cute. Now she has had plastic surgery and ozempic and looks like a dying child starving in Africa.


6 posted on 11/19/2025 3:15:45 PM PST by packrat35 (“When discourse ends, violence begins.” – Charlie Kirk, and they killed him anyway)
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To: packrat35

“ Now she has had plastic surgery and ozempic and looks like a dying child starving in Africa.”
As long as I don’t have to look at that green one I’m good.


7 posted on 11/19/2025 5:35:12 PM PST by 9422WMR
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Ariana Grande is not bad looking for a 60-year-old.


8 posted on 11/19/2025 7:49:52 PM PST by T.B. Yoits
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