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The Nightmare Is Over: Supreme Court Outlaws Candy Corn
Babylon Bee ^ | 10-31-25 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 10/31/2025 3:41:23 PM PDT by dynachrome

Americans all over the country celebrated the news that the national nightmare that had lasted for generations was finally over, as the United States Supreme Court outlawed candy corn.

In a landmark 8-1 ruling, the nation's highest court almost unanimously declared the manufacture, sale, possession, purchase, and consumption of the substance known as "candy corn" to be illegal and unconstitutional.

"No nation can, in good faith, allow this horror to continue," said Justice Clarence Thomas, who penned the majority opinion. "The United States was founded upon a certain standard of principles to promote common decency and adherence to the most basic sense of human morality. Candy corn clearly violates these principles on a fundamental level. It is neither ‘candy' nor ‘corn,' and therefore must be abolished with extreme prejudice."

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: candycorn; thebee

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Finally!
1 posted on 10/31/2025 3:41:23 PM PDT by dynachrome
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To: dynachrome

HALLELUJAH!!!


2 posted on 10/31/2025 3:44:40 PM PDT by V_TWIN (RIP Charlie Kirk)
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To: dynachrome

We hated that crap as a kid but we ate it because it was candy.

We used to take two of them and stick them in our mouth and make vampire teeth with them.


3 posted on 10/31/2025 3:46:22 PM PDT by Morgana ( “Abortion is the ultimate exploitation of women.” — Alice Paul 🇺🇸 )
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To: dynachrome

I like candy corn. Alright, call me depraved and uncivilized, but it has always been one of my favorites. It’s just that not enough stores sell them except on Halloween.


4 posted on 10/31/2025 3:48:14 PM PDT by Telepathic Intruder
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To: dynachrome

Good riddance.

Cotton Candy should be next.


5 posted on 10/31/2025 3:49:33 PM PDT by laplata (They want each crisis to take the greatest toll possible.)
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To: Telepathic Intruder

We are watching you.


6 posted on 10/31/2025 3:50:16 PM PDT by iamgalt
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To: Telepathic Intruder

I’m with ya — I also like it. They’re still making it, so I guess enough like it to keep producing it.


7 posted on 10/31/2025 3:52:18 PM PDT by AnglePark (My opinion is the most worthless thing I own.)
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To: Telepathic Intruder

It’s one of my favorite candies. I also like the little ‘pumpkins’ and other shapes made from the same recipe.

(Farley’s was the absolute best; we always got it at Murphy’s; but I don’t see it anywhere around here anymore.)


8 posted on 10/31/2025 3:56:22 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: Jamestown1630

Yes, the large pumpkin ones and so forth. I think a lot of people don’t like them just because of the corn appearance. But like all other candy, it’s mostly plain old sugar.


9 posted on 10/31/2025 4:03:37 PM PDT by Telepathic Intruder
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To: Telepathic Intruder

I can take it or leave it, but it has a nice buttery flavor.


10 posted on 10/31/2025 4:06:13 PM PDT by Flaming Conservative ((Pray without ceasing))
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To: dynachrome; All

Thinking of Holiday foods:

Can anyone still find a mincemeat pie in their local grocery store at holiday time?

It’s been my favorite since childhood for Thanksgiving and Christmas, but it’s been several years since the stores here have had one. They don’t even have the jars of mince filling they always used to carry so one could make a mince pie at home.


11 posted on 10/31/2025 4:23:24 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: dynachrome

Yesterday (Thursday Oct 30) was National Candy Corn Day. I went to half a dozen stores, couldn’t find any to save my life. Next year I’m just going to order it from Amazon a week in advance. https://nationaltoday.com/national-candy-corn-day/


12 posted on 10/31/2025 4:24:47 PM PDT by NurdlyPeon (It is the nature of liberals to pervert whatever they touch.)
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To: dynachrome

Geez. Such hatred.

I like the kind with the little “chocolate-like” layer.


13 posted on 10/31/2025 4:25:08 PM PDT by workerbee
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To: dynachrome

14 posted on 10/31/2025 4:29:25 PM PDT by equaviator (Nobody's perfect. That's why they put pencils on erasers!)
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To: iamgalt

Talamasca?


15 posted on 10/31/2025 4:31:28 PM PDT by BipolarBob (These violent delights have violent ends.)
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To: Jamestown1630

Candy corn mixes well in a trail mix like Walmart’s Cajun Mix. Sounds crazy, but that red pepper kicks it up a notch.


16 posted on 10/31/2025 4:41:12 PM PDT by myprecious
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To: dynachrome

I like it…


17 posted on 10/31/2025 4:43:04 PM PDT by DesertRhino (When men on the chessboard, get up and tell you where to go…)
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To: Jamestown1630
Braswell Classic Mincemeat pie filling is available in my local mega-lo-mart. Walmart has None Such Brand

Mrs. Smith's Classic Mince Pie (frozen) is still around.

If you must you can try Amazon.

18 posted on 10/31/2025 4:44:29 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear (It's like somebody just put the Constitution up on a wall …. and shot the First Amendment -Mike Rowe)
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To: dynachrome

Love candy corn, just can’t eat it.


19 posted on 10/31/2025 4:49:23 PM PDT by JZelle
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

Thanks.

All my life we could get Crosse and Blackwell filling here; and their plum puddings, too.

But then the best grocery chain, which was headquartered locally and catered to all the different interests in the community, was sold off to a big European conglomerate, and nothing was the same anymore.

I’ll try Walmart.


20 posted on 10/31/2025 5:00:26 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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