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Hamas Agrees To Surrender If Europe Will Take Greta Thunberg Back
Babylon Bee ^
Posted on 06/04/2025 4:30:23 AM PDT by FLT-bird
GAZA — The tables were turned on the infamous terrorist organization today, with horrified Hamas agreeing to a full and unconditional surrender to Israel if Europe would agree to take Greta Thunberg back.
The well-known left-wing activist was said to be en route to Gaza by sea to make her presence felt in peace negotiations between the two warring sides, leaving Hamas scrambling to do whatever was necessary to stave off her arrival.
"Please, don't let this happen! We will do whatever it takes to keep her away," said Hamas spokesterrorist Abu Muhammed Zahir. "While we have a reputation for perpetrating violent and ruthless acts against our enemies, sending Greta Thunberg here is far beyond any definition of cruel and unusual punishment. We offer Israel our total surrender if Europe agrees to have this wretched harpy turn her ship around and go back to wherever she came from. Thank you, and death to Israel and America."
European officials declined to comment on the details of any negotiations with Hamas but did express strong reluctance to allow Thunberg to return to the continent. "No, that's not an option," said spokeseuropean Jürgen Bürgen. "We finally had the opportunity to get her on board a ship bound for international waters. It is our intent to prevent her from ever coming back. We got rid of her. We wish the residents of Gaza the best when Greta makes it to shore. May God be merciful."
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; gretathunberg; hamas; hezbollah; iran; thunberg; yemen
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
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1
posted on
06/04/2025 4:30:23 AM PDT
by
FLT-bird
To: FLT-bird
2
posted on
06/04/2025 4:33:45 AM PDT
by
House Atreides
(I’m now ULTRA-MAGA-PRO-MAX)
To: FLT-bird
3
posted on
06/04/2025 4:42:21 AM PDT
by
PGalt
(Past Peak Civilization?)
To: FLT-bird
To: FLT-bird
Would be a terrible thing if Thrunberg got caught in crossfire there and ended casters-up! Terrible!!!
5
posted on
06/04/2025 4:49:10 AM PDT
by
eeriegeno
(Checks and balances??? What checks and balances?)
To: House Atreides; FLT-bird; PGalt; Uncle Miltie
[take Greta Thunberg Back]
Greta Thunberg is sooooo stupid. Hamas might just kill her with some weapon they captured from a dead IDF soldier. THEN, they'd claim ISRAEL killed her...
She has to be dumber than Democrat Adam Schiff or Democrat Jamie Raskin to walk into that war zone. She might just become cannon fodder for propaganda purposes. Leftist Idiot, she is. Along with her parents.
(from another time) The little Leftist Twit just can't make a good judgment call (likely her idiot parents are involved again with this one, too)

6
posted on
06/04/2025 4:49:40 AM PDT
by
SaveFerris
(Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
To: House Atreides
Well, Hamas DID send a drone out to herd her back toward the mid-part of the Mediterranean.
From what I saw of the video, she seemed to be genuinely in a state of real fear.
FO, FA
7
posted on
06/04/2025 4:49:53 AM PDT
by
alloysteel
( Divergence is not at all the same thing as diversity.)
To: eeriegeno
[Would be a terrible thing if Thrunberg got caught in crossfire there and ended casters-up! Terrible!!!]
See post 6
8
posted on
06/04/2025 4:50:12 AM PDT
by
SaveFerris
(Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
To: SaveFerris
Sometimes it’s best to just sit back and let Darwin win the day as an example to others.
9
posted on
06/04/2025 4:55:46 AM PDT
by
Sirius Lee
("Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.”)
To: Sirius Lee
True. I’d just hate to see her used for such purposes.
Only because the world falls for just about everything used as propaganda against Israel.
10
posted on
06/04/2025 4:57:58 AM PDT
by
SaveFerris
(Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
To: FLT-bird
Somebody owes me a new keyboard. Bwahahaha
11
posted on
06/04/2025 5:17:30 AM PDT
by
griswold3
(Truth Beauty and Goodness)
To: FLT-bird
12
posted on
06/04/2025 5:26:45 AM PDT
by
cableguymn
(Can't cancel all of us)
To: FLT-bird
"Stay in your lane"
See, Thunberg, Greta.
13
posted on
06/04/2025 5:36:34 AM PDT
by
blackdog
((Z28.310) Dogs are with us briefly. Politicians last on forever. Listen to your dog. )
To: FLT-bird
...And little girls from Sweden dream of silver-screen quotation
And if you want these kind of dreams, it's Californication "Californication" by the Red Hot Chili Peppers (1999)
To: SaveFerris
Where is her HIJAB?
Stone the blasphemer
To: woodbutcher1963
16
posted on
06/04/2025 5:53:28 AM PDT
by
SaveFerris
(Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
To: FLT-bird
I hope that Greta’s days as a paid socialists commentator are nearing a close. The world is getting tired of it with all of her BS.
17
posted on
06/04/2025 5:59:43 AM PDT
by
Eli Kopter
(ביחד ננצח הלב שלנו שבוי בעזה)
To: FLT-bird
No need to even read the article; the title is PERFECT.
18
posted on
06/04/2025 6:03:51 AM PDT
by
MayflowerMadam
(It's hard not to celebrate the fall of bad people. - Bongino)
To: eeriegeno
I wouldn’t mind seeing a Greta Corrie Pancake moment. LOL
19
posted on
06/04/2025 6:20:38 AM PDT
by
healy61
To: FLT-bird
LOL! We don’t want her either. She’s an obnoxious nuisance. An ugly one too. The U.S. Congress Teenaged, Cupie Doll, Jazzmammy Croquette modeled herself after The Thunderbutt.
20
posted on
06/04/2025 6:46:30 AM PDT
by
FlingWingFlyer
(Where can Americans go to seek justice now that the RATS own the judiciary?)
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