Posted on 10/29/2024 8:43:35 AM PDT by Zhang Fei
A 90 year old man tells his Rabbi that he is going to marry a teenage woman.
“Well it’s good not to be alone. But you know a person has needs that must be fulfilled. And you want a happy home.
So let me suggest something. You should hire a gardener.”
Ahah, Rabbi , the think I understand. You are very wise.
6 months later they cross paths.
“How are you? How is married life?”
“Wonderful! And Rabbi, my wife is pregnant!”
The rabbi strokes his chin, “And how is the gardener?”
“Wonderful! She’s pregnant too! “
ROFL!!!!!
Thanks, we need MORE of these thoughout the day...like 8 or 9 :)
Ba Dum Tish!
Literally LOL.
LOL. Good one.
Was the 90 year old man named Emhoff or Schwarzenegger?
And all three are voting for Trump...
If they have the time lol
He’s a real live wire!
Did you hear about the married couple that went to see a marriage therapist? The therapist asked the lady, “Why did you want to meet today”? the wife said, “My husband takes everything I say literally”. The therapist looks at the husband and says, “What brought you in today?” He says, “A car”.
The genie looks concerned, then says "No, I'm sorry, that's just not possible. Some things just can't be changed. Do you have another wish?"
The guys says 'Well...for my whole life I've never received oral sex from my wife. That would be my wish." The genie pauses for another moment and then says "How would you define peace?"
Hope springs eternal!.....................
LOL
A Jewish grandma was walking along the beach with her toddler grandson, when a huge wave crashed up and swept the child out into the ocean. The frantic grandma prayed and prayed and cried out to God. Then, suddenly, another wave came in and deposited the wee boy onto the beach, unharmed.
The grandma looks to the heavens, and says, “Thank you so much, God, but, he WAS wearing a hat.”
A 90 year old man tells his Rabbi that he is going to marry a teenage woman.
Rabbi says, “Aren’t you worried about dying during sex?”
90 year old man shrugs and replies, “If she dies, she dies”..........
[A Jewish man is walking on the beach when he finds a lamp in the sand. He rubs it and a genie comes out, promises to grant him one wish. He says, “Peace in the Middle east, that’s my wish.”
The genie looks concerned, then says “No, I’m sorry, that’s just not possible. Some things just can’t be changed. Do you have another wish?”
The guys says ‘Well...for my whole life I’ve never received oral sex from my wife. That would be my wish.” The genie pauses for another moment and then says “How would you define peace?”]
Jacob was in his 80’s when he married Rachel and Leah.
He still fathered the 12 tribes.
Or the 90 year old in the same situation, about to marry a teenage woman. His doctor told him he really needed to be careful during sex because heart failure as an option.
“Well Doc, if she dies, she dies...”
Good luck to
Him.
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