The hospice worker said when she was being admitted that she probably had about 2 weeks, (I guess they have seen it many times).
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They time the opiate induced death pretty well.
And Moses was an hundred and twenty years old when he died: his eye was not dim, nor his natural force abated.Deuteronomy 34:7
Carter was very fortunate to make it to 100. He has had pretty decent quality of life until the last period of maybe 5 years or so. We never know what is in store for us. Prayers for mercy Dear Lord.
I’m 80 and what upsets me the most is that when I was young, no old people had the common decency to warn me
and tell me what was coming. It seems that old age is the punishment for the evil things we have done over the years.
I think about this a lot. I’ve outlived all my friends and family so being a burden isn’t a problem. You just have to trust that God won’t give you more than you can bear. I think one of the reasons thing deteriorate so much as we age is so when it’s time to go we can all say “thank God that’s over”
I am thinking the same things.
I have an issue with the tenant of faith that demands a natural end.
We can keep folks alive well past the due dates of the past, as it were. Not necessarily in great or even endurable shape but we can stave off death, while our systems slowly fail.
I still struggle with that a lot.
Do I really want to be a burden on anyone at my end? Is that some kind of hubris to keep breathing to a bitter finish?
Let's see if he dies this month in order that there be the spectacle of a State Funeral for which biden due to a "cold" cannot deliver the eulogy and cameltoe fills in to gushing wall-to-wall, non-stop praise from the media.
As for your situation, there is no reason to go out like Carter, or Reagan.
Accept whatever terminal condition comes. Treat it with nothing more than painkillers and the end will be quicker and more dignified.
I too am in my 70th year. I think about the end of life and sometimes wish not to be a burden on the younger. However, I have come to believe that the younger need to learn about the eventual future that faces them. You have one child whom you nurtured through the years when they could not care for themselves. It will now be their turn to care for you at the end of your life. That is how life is, the circle will not be broken till the end of days.
I told my kids to accidentally leave the liquid morphine bottle within my reach and go for a drive.
It took six months for my father to die slowly and in torture, just about everyone almost lost their jobs doing home hospice. Just this last Sunday I lost my wife after two months of pure torture for her.
Nope, I am not going to burden my family that way again... I don’t fear it. When it is time it is time and I will be ready for it.
Godspeed.
No guarantees but my thought is “just say no” to the cornucopia of modern geriatric medications. You would probably feel better until you don’t and then fade faster or crash, naturally. Don’t let big pharma and big medicine bleed your family dry by putting you in an indefinite, insensible invalidity.
Job 19
1 Then Job answered and said,
2 How long will ye vex my soul, and break me in pieces with words?
3 These ten times have ye reproached me: ye are not ashamed that ye make yourselves strange to me.
4 And be it indeed that I have erred, mine error remaineth with myself.
5 If indeed ye will magnify yourselves against me, and plead against me my reproach:
6 Know now that God hath overthrown me, and hath compassed me with his net.
7 Behold, I cry out of wrong, but I am not heard: I cry aloud, but there is no judgment.
8 He hath fenced up my way that I cannot pass, and he hath set darkness in my paths.
9 He hath stripped me of my glory, and taken the crown from my head.
10 He hath destroyed me on every side, and I am gone: and mine hope hath he removed like a tree.
11 He hath also kindled his wrath against me, and he counteth me unto him as one of his enemies.
12 His troops come together, and raise up their way against me, and encamp round about my tabernacle.
13 He hath put my brethren far from me, and mine acquaintance are verily estranged from me.
14 My kinsfolk have failed, and my familiar friends have forgotten me.
15 They that dwell in mine house, and my maids, count me for a stranger: I am an alien in their sight.
16 I called my servant, and he gave me no answer; I intreated him with my mouth.
17 My breath is strange to my wife, though I intreated for the children’s sake of mine own body.
18 Yea, young children despised me; I arose, and they spake against me.
19 All my inward friends abhorred me: and they whom I loved are turned against me.
20 My bone cleaveth to my skin and to my flesh, and I am escaped with the skin of my teeth.
21 Have pity upon me, have pity upon me, O ye my friends; for the hand of God hath touched me.
22 Why do ye persecute me as God, and are not satisfied with my flesh?
23 Oh that my words were now written! oh that they were printed in a book!
24 That they were graven with an iron pen and lead in the rock for ever!
25 For I know that my redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth:
26 And though after my skin worms destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see God:
27 Whom I shall see for myself, and mine eyes shall behold, and not another; though my reins be consumed within me.
God has protected me for my entire life.
I will do what he asks of me as I get near to the elderly years.
ping
Thank you for this thought-provoking thread.
My first thought is one of gratitude for the burdens of my life, and they are not few.
Thankfully, my life has been filled with burdens.
The gift of a child is an indescribable blessing and caring for a child is a blessed burden which taught me, among many other things, the great value of selflessness.
There have been the many burdens of caring for a loved one who was suffering or of being ill myself at times, but my loved ones and I grew stronger and wiser and more compassionate by bearing those burdens.
Christ’s suffering was a burden. He willingly carried His burdens for love of us and to show us how to be selfless and to love one another.
I’ve lived long enough to be thankful for the many burdens which I’ve endured.
I still have a long way to grow but without the burdens which have ambushed me along the way I’d be much more selfish than I am.
If my children have to care for me I hope and believe that they, too, will carry that burden with compassion, learning even more during that time about what loving another human being means.
Thank you, again, Az Joe.
Your thread has brought to mind so many difficult yet wonderful memories of loved ones, many of whom are no longer here with me, that I will go to sleep tonight with a heart full to overflowing with gratitude.
Good night and May God bless you and yours.
Hell!
I’ll be 91 this November and don’t care what condition I’m in when I’m 100+...
As long as I can still drive and visit grand kids and great-grand kids, I’ll be happy...
In any case, Carter is pretty much in the same mental state that he was in when he allowed the State Department communists to infiltrate & gain control of the CIA...
You also have the right to change your mind.
I know someone who was vehement in how he was not going to have any surgeries once he reached seventy. He was just going to let nature take it's course. And then he had a major blood clot that would have been fatal if left and had surgery to remove it. His choice.
The only thing I will say is if you opt for an early exit do not put it on someone else. Your life. Your choice. Your hand. That burden belongs no where but on you.
Free advice and worth every penny.
I’m 69 and my wife is 68. She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s in 2012 though the signs were there in 2011. We moved to FL to get established and a network of friends for when we retired. When she was diagnosed I promised her that I would be with her every step of the way until she no longer needed me. I retired on 12/31/2020 and had been taking care of in-house (convinced my employer to let me work from home) since 2016. She has been on hospice since 4/2023 and does not know me and does not really speak though she sometimes mumbles and occasionally will answer a question with a yes or no though I often doubt she understood the question. She may not know me but I know her and I still love her and will not abandon her to someplace else to take care of. We’re Catholics and she will be allowed to pass away a dignified natural death on God’s timeframe unless he takes me first. Next may we’ll celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary God willing.
I’m not afraid of death but I’ll do nothing to hasten mine or hers.
I think the tiny home, which could be nicely decorated, could turn a big negative into a big positive for all involved.
I've also thought about doing something creative with this large country house in which I'm living now. The two first floor master bedrooms are ideal for the elderly, and the second floor is a nice fit for visiting family members. There's a third floor too, which is well suited for younger kids. The front porch is, according to Randy the mail man, "the best sitting porch in the state".
It gets really exciting here when the delivery person comes with the latest Amazon package. At my age I've already forgotten what I ordered and it feels like Christmas (today Santa brought me three hand-held ham radios!).
Only morbid ones.
Palliative care, our household.✔️