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As Russian Warships Threaten Florida Coast, Biden Responds Decisively To Ensure Safety Of All Pride Murals
The Bee ^ | June 13, 2024 | Staff

Posted on 06/13/2024 3:38:40 PM PDT by Navy Patriot

MIAMI, FL — In the wake of the sighting of a Russian naval flotilla not far from the coast of Florida, President Biden, Commander-in-Chief of the Armed Forces, has swiftly and competently reacted to the situation in order to defend his top security priority: all of the Florida Pride murals.

According to National Security sources, the Russian task force which includes a nuclear submarine and a frigate could pose a threat to US sovereignty, but more importantly, they might splash water - or even leave tire tracks - on gay pride murals. The National Guard and the Coast Guard have been ordered to dispatch troops to keep a 24-hour watch on all Pride murals within a 250-mile radius of the Russian ships.

"Rest assured, Americans," White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre said in an emergency press conference. "President Biden is doing everything within his power to make sure that American assets are protected and secure in the face of Russian saber-rattling - especially the most precious national symbol of all: our pride murals!"

President Biden later confirmed the decision in a brief speech. "You know them warships in Mexico, Jack? They're just dog-faced, lying pony soldiers! REPEAT THE LINE. We'll make sure that they can't take any of their malarkey against our Gaza Pride folx!"

At publishing time, Biden's security team had been horrified to hear rumors of Russian threats to misgender kindergarteners and interrupt drag queen story hours. Sources report that government security agents have been posted to defend vital national interests like abortion clinics and gender transition centers.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Education; History
KEYWORDS: abominationmonth; babylonbee; biden; pride
The US will defend GloboHomo to the last breath of every American, ... except members of the Biden Family.
1 posted on 06/13/2024 3:38:40 PM PDT by Navy Patriot
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To: Navy Patriot
I don't believe the Russian warships are 'threatening' Florida. At most, Biden will try to use their presence to justify preemptive strikes on Russia.

Despite it's awkward title, Alexander Mercouris' remarks in the thread I'm linking below gives an insightful overview of the real situation in the Ukraine, and it's part of why I believe that 10 yr agreement is worthless optics.


2 posted on 06/13/2024 3:41:38 PM PDT by ransomnote (IN GOD WE TRUST)
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To: Navy Patriot

Give the Russians shore leave in Florida, and they will cornhole every fag from Miami to Tampa.


3 posted on 06/13/2024 3:42:10 PM PDT by Candor7 (Ask not for whom the Trump Trolls,He trolls for thee!),<img src="" width=500</img><a href="">tag</a>)
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To: Navy Patriot

God I hope we get rid of this guy.


4 posted on 06/13/2024 3:43:58 PM PDT by Beowulf9
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To: ransomnote

Okay, now I see it’s the BEE! *facepalm*


5 posted on 06/13/2024 3:45:27 PM PDT by ransomnote (IN GOD WE TRUST)
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To: Navy Patriot

I’ll cruise out in the sailboat and take them on. I haven’t managed to sink her yet, so, I doubt a Russian could either.


6 posted on 06/13/2024 3:46:58 PM PDT by Conan the Librarian (Conan the Sailing Librarian)
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To: Navy Patriot

Hey, maybe Biden’s plan is if Russia declares war on the US he will fire LGBTQICBM Missles at them and inundate them with sexually confused folks that will immediately tie up all government operations until those folks’ desires are placated.


7 posted on 06/13/2024 4:06:48 PM PDT by antidemoncrat
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To: Navy Patriot

(Not responding specifically to you)

The Russians and the Chinese have the same right to the Caribbean as the US does to the Baltic and the Black Sea.

We are not (officially) at war with Russia. We should welcome their ship to make liberty calls in US ports as a low-level form of diplomacy.


8 posted on 06/13/2024 4:17:19 PM PDT by Fai Mao (The US government is run by pedophiles and Perverts )
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To: Fai Mao
It's The Bee.

The purpose is to make the Russians Laugh themselves to Death.

9 posted on 06/13/2024 4:22:01 PM PDT by Navy Patriot (Celebrate Decivilization)
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To: ransomnote

Yeah, but are they wrong?


10 posted on 06/13/2024 7:00:06 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus…)
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To: Navy Patriot

I hope the Russians get liberty in Key West.


11 posted on 06/14/2024 8:48:46 AM PDT by ComputerGuy (Heavily-medicated for your protection)
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