Posted on 01/06/2024 9:52:44 AM PST by Twotone
With school choice being such a hot topic these days, it can be helpful for parents to learn more about what the experiences are like in different learning environments. Though there may be pros and cons to each option, the differences may surprise you.
The Babylon Bee is proud to help parents make more well-informed decisions with the following list of differences between public school kids and homeschooled kids:
Homeschooled Kids: Learn how to manufacture paste using complex chemical processes. Their mother then sells the paste as a side hustle.
Public Schooled Kids: Eat paste.
Homeschooled Kids: Read War and Peace. In Kindergarten. For fun.
Public Schooled Kids: Read The Big Gay Sex Book.
Homeschooled Kids: Reading at a college level in 2nd grade.
Public Schooled Kids: Exploring alternative sexualities at a college level in 2nd grade.
Homeschooled Kids: A full day of lessons packed into two hours.
Public Schooled Kids: Two hours of lessons stretched into a full day.
Homeschooled Kids: Kill and butcher wild game and eat eggs provided by the backyard chickens.
Public Schooled Kids: Eat processed, genetically modified food provided by the government.
Homeschooled Kids: Tuesday afternoon is "Range Day" with Dad.
Public Schooled Kids: Get arrested for picking up a gun-shaped stick and saying "pew pew!"
Homeschooled Kids: Educational field trip to the local zoo.
Public Schooled Kids: The classroom is a zoo.
Homeschooled Kids: Think public schoolers are weird and are right.
Public Schooled Kids: Think homeschoolers are weird and are right.
We hope this valuable information helps you make the best decision for your child!
Homeschooled Kids: Tuesday afternoon is “Range Day” with Dad.
I don’t think I can love this enough! :)
*BUMP *PING*
Homeschooled kids go to Hillsdale College and come home loving God, their parents, and their country!
ping
Public school kids go to college and come home hating God, and their parents, and loving Hamas...
Yup. Also, if you send your son to a public college he comes back claiming to be a girl.
Mom doesn’t go? :)
None of mine went to hillsdale but they all love God, parents and country.
PUBLIC SCHOOL EXIT
https://www.publicschoolexit.com/
The mission of PublicSchool Exit is to facilitate an exodus of American children and families from government-controlled education by educating the public and helping families. We are more than an organization, we are a movement.
Why would you think anyone would have to look up Rooster Cogburn?
Home school kids: science, dad teaching how to build a still and turn corn into liquid!
Public school kids: Bud Lite
Home school kids: Learn how to save money.
Public school kids: Learn how to hand over money to thugs.
Homeschooled Kids: Reading at a college level in 2nd grade.
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Loved this one. My home-schooled daughter did test out at the college level in the 2nd grade !!!
Very true
I know who Rooster Cogburn is. Didn't know there was a Rooster Cogburn as somewhere to go. Appears to be an ostrich ranch in Arizona. Could be interesting.
Yes, the Rooster Cogburn Ostrich Ranch in Picacho, AZ, on I-10 not many miles NW of Tucson. I’ve driven past it any number of times but never stopped, because when I pass it I’m either just setting out on a trip or almost home.
So true! :)
Praise Jesus for your success as a parent!
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