Skip to comments.
Aphorisms
Me - Unabashed vanity
Posted on 07/11/2023 4:12:45 PM PDT by FrozenAssets
I always enjoy aphorisms, especially the humorous country type. 
They was a makin' more racket than a bunch of skeletons pitching a hissy fit on a tin roof!
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 000001damnedvanity; aphorisms; noob; noobvanity; vanity
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
 first 1-20, 21-28 next  last
    
To: FrozenAssets
    I’m busier than if I had a cat covered in sh** on a marble floor
 
2
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:13:37 PM PDT
by 
PGR88
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Joe Biden. Nuttier than squirrel turds.
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Like lookin’ for a black cat in a coal mine....
 
4
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:17:23 PM PDT
by 
JBW1949
(I'm really PC.....Patriotically Correct)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Many are thawed but feware frozen!
 
5
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:18:59 PM PDT
by 
sheik yerbouty
(  Make America and the world a jihad free zone!)
 
To: sheik yerbouty
To: FrozenAssets
    Like lookin up a hog’s butt for a ham sandwich...
 
7
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:40:14 PM PDT
by 
gundog
(It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. )
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Busier than a pair of jumper cables at a Mexican picnic.
 
8
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:41:52 PM PDT
by 
ArtDodger
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Senator John Kennedy; “Washington is working harder than an Ugly Stripper to cover up for the Biden family!”
 
To: ArtDodger
    Lower than a snake’s belly in a roadside ditch.
 
10
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:44:20 PM PDT
by 
FrozenAssets
(You don't have to be crazy to live here, but it helps)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    “Your house smells fresher than a clean litter-box!”
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Hanging on like a senator hugging a barrel of bacon.
 
12
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:45:57 PM PDT
by 
FrozenAssets
(You don't have to be crazy to live here, but it helps)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    I once read a description of a Harpsichord that it sounded like 2 skeletons copulating on a tin roof.
 
13
posted on 
07/11/2023 4:51:28 PM PDT
by 
mitch5501
("make your calling and election sure:for if ye do these things ye shall never fall")
 
To: cephalopod
    The wife and I play a little word game where you make up the name and honorific of a very unlikely head of state. Extra points for alliteration.
for example:
Melvin the Mediocre or Ludwig the Ludicrous.
 
14
posted on 
07/11/2023 5:00:25 PM PDT
by 
FrozenAssets
(You don't have to be crazy to live here, but it helps)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    More nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs
 
15
posted on 
07/11/2023 5:06:31 PM PDT
by 
coincheck
(Salvation is for today, not tomorrow, you might not make it that far.....)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Loving you is like cooking bacon nekkid.
 
16
posted on 
07/11/2023 5:15:56 PM PDT
by 
left that other site
(Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Jed Clampett was always good for a few. My favorite:
 That fella's tighter than the strings on a two dollar fiddle...
 
17
posted on 
07/11/2023 5:20:11 PM PDT
by 
fhayek
 
To: FrozenAssets
    Happier than a pitbull in a preschool playground.
 
18
posted on 
07/11/2023 5:23:51 PM PDT
by 
bunnie911
(But resist, we much, we must, and we will much, about, that...be committed)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    That road’s crookeder than a dog’s hind leg.
 
19
posted on 
07/11/2023 5:29:07 PM PDT
by 
gitmo
(If your theology doesn’t become your biography, what good is it?)
 
To: FrozenAssets
    That thing runs faster than a scalded dog.
 
20
posted on 
07/11/2023 5:29:56 PM PDT
by 
gitmo
(If your theology doesn’t become your biography, what good is it?)
 
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
 first 1-20, 21-28 next  last
    Disclaimer:
    Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual
    posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its
    management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the
    exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson