FDA Announces Tween Sale (Safe and Effective Satire)

2/15/23 | RetiredTexasVet

[RetiredTexasVet]

Dr Bob Califf, FDA Commissioner, announced the Spring Tween sale of Emergency Use Authorizations (EUA). Coming off the COVID Pandemic but before the next pandemic is engineered by the NIH, Wuhan and WEF, there is a revenue hole at the FDA which the Tween (Between Pandemics) Sale is designed to fill.

You may now purchase an EUA at a steeply discounted price with many enhancements with the Plus Package. With the Plus Package you get a waiver for studies, tests and test data submissions. Additionally, any data submitted is declared National Security related and receives a Top Secret classification. FOIA requests are blunted to the extent that the requestors great grandchildren will die of old age before any information is released. But best of all, a Plus Package purchase includes the 10% for the Big Guy (beat the 1 March increase to 15%).

Throw in a few bucks more and Rochelle "Hot Mess" Walensky, CDC Director, will setup a professional propaganda rollout for your EUA product. Rochelle will enlist CDC, FDA, NIH and MSM Rent-a-Docs to swear to the Safe and Effectiveness of your EUA product regardless of any scientific basis for the claim. Additional scare mongering efforts coordinated by the FBI with Social Media and MSN will be made on your behalf. High profile Hollywood A-List actors will be rented to tout the benefits of your EUA approved product.

Safe and Effective Satire is now proud to announce that it has purchased an EUA and can legally claim that Safe and Effective Satire can diagnose, treat and cure brain deficiencies and defects in Liberals and Progressives. Until our check clears, we must warn you that: The State of California has determined that Safe and Effective Satire may cause cancer in Liberals and Progressives in the State of California.