Posted on 10/29/2022 6:31:50 PM PDT by nickcarraway
RAISING SUCCESSFUL KIDS
Published Sat, Oct 29 20229:55 AM EDTUpdated 10:08 AM EDT thumbnail Esther Wojcicki, Contributor @ESTHERWOJCICKI SHARE Share Article via Facebook Share Article via Twitter Share Article via LinkedIn Share Article via Email I raised 2 successful CEOs and a professor of pediatrics—here's the biggest parenting mistake I see 2:52 I raised 2 successful CEOs and a professor of pediatrics—here’s the biggest parenting mistake I see Here’s a wake-up call for American parents: We are doing too much for our kids. This is the origin of “helicopter parenting,” in which we constantly remove obstacles so that our kids don’t have to deal with challenges.
There were many unpopular parenting rules I followed as a young, single mother. But my No. 1 was: Don’t do anything for your kids that they can do for themselves.
That worked out for my daughters. All three grew up to be highly successful: Susan is the CEO of YouTube, Janet is a doctor, and Anne is the co-founder and CEO of 23andMe. They rose to the top of competitive, male-dominated professions.
Parents need to stop coddling their kids The more you trust your children to do things on their own, the more empowered they’ll be. The key is to begin with guided practice: It’s the “I do, we do, you do” method.
You can try this with all sorts of simple, everyday actions:
Waking up: Have them set their own alarm.
Getting dressed: Let them pick their own outfit.
Breakfast/lunch/dinner: Give them simple tasks like stirring the pancake batter, cleaning their lunchbox and setting the table. Getting their backpack ready: Have them run through a list of what they need to bring that day. Making plans: Let them come up with weekend or after school activities. Checking homework: It’s okay if they don’t get 100% of the answers correct. Let them learn from the mistakes. Chores are especially important. Washing dishes was a big one in our house. All my daughters stood on a little stool at the sink and washed the dishes after dinner.
And when we went grocery shopping, I’d ask them to get two pounds of apples. They had to pick out the good ones, which I’d taught them how to do, and measure pounds on the scale.
If we went over our grocery budget, they’d help me decide what to put back.
Don’t worry about perfection
I expected my daughters to make their own beds every morning. Ha! A bed made by a kid can look like she’s still asleep in it. But I didn’t fight them. As long as they did it, I was happy.
Mastery means doing something as many times as it takes to get it right. Being a writing teacher taught me this. In the 80s and 90s, one of the supposed characteristics of a good teacher was that your class was so hard that many students failed.
But the kids who got a D on their first paper found it impossible to recover and lost the motivation to improve, since they were starting out so far behind.
So I gave them the opportunity to revise their work as many times as they wanted. Their grade was based on the final product. And when it came time for testing, my students performed in the 90th percentile of state exams.
It was the learning and the hard work that I wanted to reward, not getting it right the first time.
Kids are smarter than you think
To be clear, I’m not saying you should make your kids do things they don’t understand or aren’t capable of, nor am I saying you should let them play in the street if it isn’t safe, or walk to the store if the neighborhood is dangerous.
The idea is to teach them how to cope with what life throws at them. One of the most important lessons I taught my daughters is that the only thing you can control is how you react to things.
When you trust kids to make their own decisions, they start to feel more engaged, confident and empowered. And once that happens, there’s no limit to what they can achieve.
Esther Wojcicki is an educator, journalist, and bestselling author of “How to Raise Successful People.” She is also the co-founder of Tract.app and chief parenting office at Sesh. Follow her on Twitter @EstherWojcicki.
So you raise at least two horrible people.
I would not brag about that if I were you.
I was thinking 🤔 similar
Two liberal places right there
Of course, it would be a different YouTube.
I do agree on the child raising tips in the article. Helicopter parenting is detrimental to properly raising a child.
Does she mention she is one of God’s chosen people?
Kanye would point at this article, roll his eyes and say “sure, that was the reason”
All types of life skills… I wonder which ones Oskar Dirlewanger’s mom taught him?
I mean, even Dahmer's parents managed to turn out one good one.
Just read some of her other daughter's articles.
High food insecurity in Latinx families and associated COVID-19 infection in the Greater Bay Area, California
I think it is safe to say this mom failed badly.
Well I figure you give your kids “choices” so they learn HOW to decide.
I am sure this mom would be fine with that along with a whole bunch of other perversions.
Resent much? Feeling a little insecure about your accomplishments?
The doctor kid must be a cardiologist. Lol.
Our oldest is a bonafide rocket scientist, a valedictorian, and working on some of the Mars designs. Our daughter is a biomedical engineer working on heart devices at a large medical device firm.
The secret belongs to my wife. She read to them constantly from birth through when they could manage it themselves. She instilled curiosity in them, and a desire to learn and discover.
THAT — just behind teaching wholesome values — is the biggest thing you can do for your child to set them on a path for success.
Her daughter Anne Wojcicki married Google’s co-founder Sergey Brin. She is now his ex-wife. The marriage did not last very long.
She and Brin founded Passarrelle Investment Co in 2014, a real estate company focuses on redeveloping downtown Los Altos, CA. She leads Los Altos Community Investments development group. Some of her projects have been good. The new State Street Market (where the old Beau Sejour was located) is a really nice addition to town. Have you tried eating there yet? Great food and a nice ambience.
Would you like a crying towel?
LOL. You’re the one whining because someone actually raised successful kids.
Why do you resent it?
“Don’t do anything for your kids that they can do for themselves”
Wow, that is probably the #1 argument I with my wife, make the kid do it herself.
One rule I made as a father; no one get a drivers license without two years experience with a lawnmower.
I also taught them how to use a toilet plunger. Rule number one for that task is “close your mouth”
I at no point whined about anything. I pointed out an objective reality that you did not like. That does not change the fact that she raised horrible people.
You undoubtedly think Stalin's parents raised a "successful child" as well.
I know to you, like all liberals, you only measure success by the amount of money you manage to scam out of people and the number of people you manage to oppress but there are other standards.
I feel very sorry for you not knowing that.
Your kids are probably 10X smarter than the Witwicky brood, but they won’t be CEO’s or CFO’s because they weren’t raised ruthless, heartless sociopaths to do what their boss tells them to do (and go to the same church as their boss, but I’m sure that’s not it).
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