What All Those Car Warning Lights Mean - A Guide for Women

The Babylon Bee ^ | Aug 17, 2022 | BabylonBee.com

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Cars are incredible contraptions. But what do all the funny lights on the dashboard mean? Ladies, this handy guide is for you!

Behold! A detailed explanation of each dashboard light:

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Try not to get too insulted, lady FReepers. :)

[Rio]

Small pieces of electrical tape can fix most of them.

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Yeah, a lot of these apply to men too.

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

Ha! Laugh? I thought I'd die.

The Bee strikes again.

[Lurker]

Another good one from the Bee.

L

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ALERT: SHOE SALE AT BLOOMINGDALE'S!

LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

[ClearCase_guy]

I think they had an episode of “Friends” where one of the women had a car die. A guy says, “What about the Check Engine light? That’s been on for months, right?” and the girl says, “The Check Engine light is fine!! It’s still on! That’s not the problem! The problem is the engine won’t start!”

[1Old Pro]

I thought they all meant that the dealer wants your money because they make crap cars.

[algore]

“Small pieces of electrical tape can fix most of them.”

Guilty

[Larry Lucido]

I think this one means pull your pants up.

[Chode]

/snort...

It's time to remove your IUD.

[CFW]

“Small pieces of electrical tape can fix most of them.”

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LOL. My mom actually did this when her “check engine” light came off and refused to go off. The mechanic told her the car was fine and it was just a bad light. To fix it would be $200 (this was 30 years ago—so a lot of money). That tape was still there 10 years later when she finally got a new car. My family drives a car until it will drive no more.

[WMarshal]

Mansplaining is the best explaining. Everything else is just fluff.

[SamAdams76]

Very helpful tips for the women out there who insist on driving their own cars, even though they'd be much better off just letting their man drive them where they need to go.

Thanks for posting.

[Nifster]

Lordy how I love The Bee. That was just plain funny

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There was a great sketch on Laugh-In in the 60’s where the 3 lady stars were driving along and the car started acting strange. They got the manual out of the glove box and the explanations were just as funny. “Carbelator.”

[reed13k]

First car I had with this light I had to ask the service dept what it meant....it only came on when I started the car but it bothered me I’d never seen it before.

[dljordan]

They mean put your phone down and drive.

[Yo-Yo]

There was an episode of Home Improvement where Jill was driving Tim's Chevy Nomad with the oil light on until the engine seized.

Tim was yelling at her "why were you driving with the oil light on?" and Jill replied "If it were really important, I figured it would start blinking or something..."