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Pfizer To Release New Vaccine (Satire)
8/21/22 | RetiredTexasVet

Posted on 08/21/2022 12:50:29 PM PDT by RetiredTexasVet

Pfizer announced today that it will be releasing a new two shot mRNA vaccine after receiving FDA Emergency Authorization approval and CDC recommendation. FDA approval and CDC recommendation has been purchased and the vaccine should be hitting hospitals, pharmacies and doctor's offices within the next two weeks.

Assisted by large amounts of graft included in the Inflation Acceleration Bill, Pfizer got the jump on all the other big pharma companies in developing the new vaccine to prevent Unknown Cause of Death (aka SADS - Sudden Adult Death Syndrome).

Piggybacking on their inside knowledge of lab developed diseases and mRNA technology, Pfizer tailored their new vaccine to specifically target Unknown Cause of Death in record time.

The Biden Administration is considering purchasing 1 billion doses of the vaccine and making the shots mandatory for all government employees and contractors. The Administration is considering bullying Medicare providers and other corporations into making the shots mandatory.


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Humor; Science
KEYWORDS: sarcasm; satire; scorn

1 posted on 08/21/2022 12:50:29 PM PDT by RetiredTexasVet
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To: RetiredTexasVet

Sounds quite plausible, sadly.


2 posted on 08/21/2022 1:03:35 PM PDT by jacknhoo ( Luke 12:51; Think ye, that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, no; but separation.)
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To: RetiredTexasVet

You do realize that SADS has been around far longer than the vaccines? It was first reported, IIRC, in the 1970s.


3 posted on 08/21/2022 1:29:53 PM PDT by DugwayDuke (most pick the expert who says the things they agree with.)
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To: DugwayDuke

....and the reason most don’t know about it is because it was rare, and an eventual plausible cause was noted. See King Herod, Pete Maravich, Reggie Echols, Hank Gathers, etc.


4 posted on 08/21/2022 1:35:11 PM PDT by Getready (Wisdom is more valuable than gold and diamonds, and harder to find.)
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To: Getready

Getready wrote: “....and the reason most don’t know about it is because it was rare, and an eventual plausible cause was noted. See King Herod, Pete Maravich, Reggie Echols, Hank Gathers, etc.”

It’s still rare except in the imaginations of the anti-vaxxer crowd.


5 posted on 08/21/2022 1:50:01 PM PDT by DugwayDuke (most pick the expert who says the things they agree with.)
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To: DugwayDuke

Regardless of the cause, there certainly does appear to be more reporting of younger folks and elderly folks with no KNOWN underlying cause dropping dead and dying.
One of the problems with NEW drugs or therapies is that people are on the lookout for its’ effects unreported or considered possible during trials. Please look up the following drugs in order to see what happens to drugs which exhibit toxicities post FDA approval: trovafloxacin, nesiritide, troglitazone.

To be fair, there are people who believe vaccines are too dangerous to use under any circumstances and that would certainly affect their belief as to the cause of any effect seen post vaccine, but the numbers of these SADS reports seem to be outside the normally reported expected numbers. If all of the SADS victims had decent analysis we could find out what really happened.


6 posted on 08/21/2022 2:20:00 PM PDT by Getready (Wisdom is more valuable than gold and diamonds, and harder to find.)
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To: Getready

If you review the history of vaccination, you’ll find the same histrionics back to the first vaccines in the late 1700’s. Back then it was claimed the smallpox vaccines would turn you into a cow. Now the it is claimed the COVID vaccines will corrupt your DNA. Then it was claimed the smallpox vaccines contained bat feces and other noxious components. Now, it is claimed the COVID vaccines contain luciferase and all sorts of other poisons.

There are no excuses for the anti-vaxxers. They’ve opposed vaccines since they were invented using the same arguments. The claim that they are only opposed to the mRNA vaccines is spurious.


7 posted on 08/21/2022 3:12:36 PM PDT by DugwayDuke (most pick the expert who says the things they agree with.)
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To: DugwayDuke

The real joke is that how can you develop a specific vaccine for the Unknown Cause of Death ....I guess you have to follow the “science”.


8 posted on 08/21/2022 7:42:03 PM PDT by RetiredTexasVet (Biden not only suffers fools and criminals, he appoints them to positions of responsibility. )
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