We Asked 1,000 Christian Women What They Want In A Spouse - Here Are The Top Responses

The Babylon Bee ^ | June 30, 2022 | The Babylon Bee

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

Are you a single loser? Are you also a man? Love scientists with The Babylon Bee talked with 1000 actual real-live women and uncovered ten things Christian women are looking for in a man. Only you have the power to mold yourself into the ultimate man and win her heart.

Consider embodying one of these amazing qualities:

1. Boaz: If you are Boaz then you can stop reading this list right now. MMM, Boaz...
2. A man with the body of Henry Cavil and the brains of C.S. Lewis: This is the whole package!
3. A believer in the patriarchy who will provide for her and free her from the shackles of corporate America: Also see, Boaz.
4. A guy who doesn't want to have sex with you and then murder the child: This is a pretty important one.
5. A godly man who loves kids and puppies and is over 6' tall and muscular and really tan with fertile seed: This is the kind of man who will give her the freedom to be in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant like she's always wanted.
6. A guy with a completed AWANA vest: The only way to know he's truly godly. Boaz had one of these.
7. A dude who never complains about casseroles: Bonus points for loving burnt meatloaf.
8. A man who will wake her up at 4 a.m. to read the King James Bible to her: NIV readers need not apply.
9. Somebody who can open pickle jars and reach things on high shelves: Better get jacked, nerds!
10. A guy who can fold a fitted sheet: Dreamy! Just like MyPillow Giza Dream Sheets.

[JimRed]

Plain girls don't have that luxury.

"Plain" can be rectified with smiling and a confident attitude, plus a bit of judicious makeup. There's real trouble for those with features that may be defined as ugly, though. Men as well. Life ain't fair.

[RatRipper]

Folding fitted sheets: I’m doomed!!!!!!

[Jamestown1630]

I don’t know, I kind of agree with the people who say girls are attracted to the superficial ‘confidence’.

[Steve Van Doorn]

said, "Our society is collapsing"
It's an intentional implosion rooted in weakening the family.

[Jonty30]

I like that Japanese method of laying it on the bed and putting the corner together and than squaring it off.

I think I will try that method. It seems easy enough.

[Mygirlsmom]

Our youngest Daughter had a checklist

Loves Jesus was #1
2. Well groomed with facial hair
3. Strong... not wimpy
4. Has a workshop or at least his own tools

There was more but you get the idea

2 years ago she was home for my birthday and we were getting ready for church. She had on a nice new dress and she said “I need to look good because you just never know if my future husband will walk into church and sit down in our row!”

Shortly after the service started a tall, bearded young man sat down in our row and pulled out his Bible and a journal to take notes on the sermon. And my daughter definitely took notice. After the service she crafted an excuse to talk to him

They’re getting married in September (and as it turns out he is quite a skilled woodworker, a fabulous cook and a wonderful, Jesus loving man. He checked every single box on her checklist and then some)

God is good!