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LETTERMAN'S TOP 10 REASONS TO VOTE DEMOCRAT
shieldspirit ^ | 11/14/2015 | David Letterman

Posted on 04/26/2022 3:40:53 AM PDT by sodpoodle

#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my German Shepherd.

# 9. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15% isn't.

# 8. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

# 7. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

# 6. I vote Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves. I am also thankful that we have a 911 service that gets police to your home in order to identify your body after a home invasion.

# 5. I vote Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive and comfy.

# 4. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we should take away Social Security from those who paid into it.

# 3. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrat Party sees fit.

# 2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.

...And, the #1 reason I vote Democrat is because I think it's better to pay $billions$ for oil to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle, gopher, or fish here in America. We don't care about the beetles, gophers, or fish in those other countries.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: ageless
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To: weezel

*****letterman would have never said those. He is a leftwing lunatic.*****

You may be correct - he was not joking - those are things he supports!!! LOL!


21 posted on 04/26/2022 5:14:05 AM PDT by sodpoodle (Life is prickly, carry tweezers.)
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To: sodpoodle

This is fake, but Letterman’s a fan of the Marine Corps, so I can somewhat forgive his other dumbassery.


22 posted on 04/26/2022 5:15:35 AM PDT by real saxophonist (Hoplophobia will never be in the DSM, because the DSM is written by hoplophobes.)
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To: sodpoodle

Letterman’s a lefty.


23 posted on 04/26/2022 5:16:53 AM PDT by 9YearLurker
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To: sodpoodle

Reminds me of this classic line from Bob Hope:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crfWULraP68


24 posted on 04/26/2022 5:19:53 AM PDT by Fresh Wind (We are living in 1984. We have always been living in 1984.)
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To: 9YearLurker

****Letterman’s a lefty.****

So the title states:)


25 posted on 04/26/2022 5:21:05 AM PDT by sodpoodle (Life is prickly, carry tweezers.)
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To: sodpoodle

So he didn’t write that. Back when he was a thing lots of imitation “top 10s” floated around.


26 posted on 04/26/2022 5:31:08 AM PDT by 9YearLurker
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To: Fester Chugabrew

Yeah, sounds like pure BS to me that Lettermen ever wrote this


27 posted on 04/26/2022 5:41:26 AM PDT by Robert DeLong
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To: sodpoodle

As others have said, an ardent leftist like Letterman would never have written this. It would be better to title it “Top 10 Reasons for Voting Democrat (With Apologies to David Lettermen”.


28 posted on 04/26/2022 5:45:15 AM PDT by Sans-Culotte (11/3-11/4/2020 - The USA became a banana republic.)
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To: sodpoodle

Number 1A

I voteDimWIT because their mandated vaxxxxxines will kill millions which will save the Earth because fewer people means less global warming.

Go get your safe and effective booster. Do it to save the planet.


29 posted on 04/26/2022 6:00:05 AM PDT by politicianslie (Those who got vaxxed need to update their wills. You are a guinea pig in a dangerous drug trial.)
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To: NWFree

Doesn’t he own a racing team. I love auto racing, But I don’t think it is the greenest sport out there. I think Indy cars get about 4 MPG. Just saying.


30 posted on 04/26/2022 6:02:45 AM PDT by MPJackal ("From my cold dead hands.")
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To: Fester Chugabrew

Yes, I doubt he wrote them or read them or had anything to do with them. “Letterman’s Top Ten List” is like Xerox, Band-Aid, Kleenex, Bubble Wrap, Thermos, Plexiglass or dozens of other brand names that became generic. Someone out there could be writing and posting another Letterman Top Ten List right now, and it’s probably not Dave or any of his writers.


31 posted on 04/26/2022 6:05:30 AM PDT by x
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To: sodpoodle

Letterman is a lunatic, but he tries to make fun of all things in his top 10. IIRC, he made fun of Hillary, Bill and Monica in a top 10.


32 posted on 04/26/2022 6:07:55 AM PDT by Deplorable American1776 (I'm the ones trying to save American Democracy...Donald Trump 6/21 at the NCGOP convention! )
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To: Nifster

Upon further review and reflection my naivete has been exposed. Oh well.


33 posted on 04/26/2022 6:20:30 AM PDT by Fester Chugabrew ("Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese." -G.K. Chesterton)
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To: sodpoodle

D4vid L3tterman is a truly horrible person. If you knew how bad he really is, you would never laugh at anything he said ever again.


34 posted on 04/26/2022 6:47:20 AM PDT by Scarlett156 (Me 3 weeks ago: EVERYONE STOP GOING ON TWATTER. *Elon happens* Me: *goes on twatter twice a day*)
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To: sodpoodle

#1a I vote democrat because Lincoln who freed the slaves was a ... Republican?


35 posted on 04/26/2022 6:58:20 AM PDT by Phlap (REDNECK@LIBARTS.EDU)
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To: EvilCapitalist

12. I vote Democrat because a 13 yr. old is wise enough to find a competent surgeon for an abortion and manage life threatening post surgical complications but her parents are too dumb to use a school voucher wisely.


36 posted on 04/26/2022 7:35:03 AM PDT by wintertime ( Behind every government school teacher stand armed police.( Real bullets in those guns on the hip!))
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To: Scarlett156

Yep, Letterman is a predator. Got me-too’d.

“Got any gum Dave?”


37 posted on 04/26/2022 8:16:49 AM PDT by subterfuge (I'm a pure-blood!)
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To: subterfuge

One of his victims was a frequent visitor to the psych ward where I used to work.


38 posted on 04/26/2022 8:21:21 AM PDT by Scarlett156 (Me 3 weeks ago: EVERYONE STOP GOING ON TWATTER. *Elon happens* Me: *goes on twatter twice a day*)
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To: Scarlett156

Hmm. Media not writing any stories on that.


39 posted on 04/26/2022 9:45:58 AM PDT by subterfuge (I'm a pure-blood!)
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To: Fester Chugabrew
Maybe this guy did?

Larry "Bud" Melman

40 posted on 04/26/2022 9:51:36 AM PDT by Tallguy
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