Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

NIKE Releases New Women's Swimsuit With Extra Space For Male Genitalia
Babylon Bee ^ | Feburary 18, 2022 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 02/20/2022 4:30:22 PM PST by Morgana

BEAVERTON, OR—After carefully listening to feedback from a growing chorus of three of their customers, Nike is making some long-awaited improvements to their 2022 women's swimwear line. Nike's new "Performance Series" of one-piece competitive women's swimsuits will feature extra room in the crotch for male genitalia.

"We suddenly realized we weren't serving a very important segment of women competitors—those with male genitals," said Nike VP of Diversity and Inclusion Xandryx Bithrannamynx. "Now, women of all shapes and sizes will be able to compete in their favorite swim sports!"

Several product designers at NIKE questioned the decision, as the new swimsuits now fit much too loosely on 99.97% of female swimmers. Those product designers were immediately condemned as transphobes and fired—after which they were doxxed, removed from social media, frozen out of their bank accounts, condemned publically by President Biden, and beat up by a 327-pound trans woman named "Lila" before being dumped on the street to fend for themselves.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Sports
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; notfunny; satire; transgender; transswimmers
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-52 next last
Comment #1 Removed by Moderator

To: Morgana

Someone post the Buffalo Bill tuck pic…


2 posted on 02/20/2022 4:31:27 PM PST by EEGator
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

LOL.


3 posted on 02/20/2022 4:31:38 PM PST by tennmountainman ( Less Lindell CONS, More AZ Style Audits)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

4 posted on 02/20/2022 4:33:09 PM PST by MinorityRepublican
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

What a disgusting company.


5 posted on 02/20/2022 4:33:22 PM PST by Sarcazmo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

Ooooooohhhh... you, you got me!


6 posted on 02/20/2022 4:33:49 PM PST by Sarcazmo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

Klaus Schwab bought the first one


7 posted on 02/20/2022 4:33:51 PM PST by butlerweave
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

I think she should be required to register as freaks 🤪


8 posted on 02/20/2022 4:33:51 PM PST by NWFree (Somebody has to say it)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana
it’s been a slippery slope for decades now...


9 posted on 02/20/2022 4:34:25 PM PST by Magnum44 (...against all enemies, foreign and domestic...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: EEGator

No!!!!!!


10 posted on 02/20/2022 4:34:38 PM PST by Sarcazmo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

They all most got me...quickly scrolled up hoping it was the Bee 🐝!

These days you just don’t know 🤡


11 posted on 02/20/2022 4:37:07 PM PST by meowmeow (In Loving Memory of Our Dear Viking Kitty (1987-2006))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Sarcazmo

Anytime you see a story like this the first thing to check for is, is it the Babylon Bee.


12 posted on 02/20/2022 4:37:10 PM PST by EvilCapitalist (Merry Christmas Illhan!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

Ok, I got got this time. I thoroughly expect this to happen in the near future.


13 posted on 02/20/2022 4:37:23 PM PST by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: MinorityRepublican; Chode

200% more crotch room. Makes me want to barf


14 posted on 02/20/2022 4:37:33 PM PST by Morgana ( Always a bit of truth in dark humor. )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

This is the Bee but it very well could have been real news.

Truth is getting stranger than fiction at an ever faster pace as the world goes mad.


15 posted on 02/20/2022 4:38:24 PM PST by Deo volente ("When we see the image of a baby in the womb, we glimpse the majesty of God's creation." Pres. Trump)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

Just emasculate them, then you wouldn’t need to modify the swim suit.


16 posted on 02/20/2022 4:38:55 PM PST by SkyDancer ( I make airplanes fly, what's your super power?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Sarcazmo

Got me, too!


17 posted on 02/20/2022 4:40:35 PM PST by TheWriterTX (Trust not in earthly princes....)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: Sarcazmo

Its fake, but most of the time their fake stories come true in a matter of weeks.


18 posted on 02/20/2022 4:41:03 PM PST by Tea Party Terrorist (Eat the Rich)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

I’m old enough to remember when Babylon Bee did satire.


19 posted on 02/20/2022 4:44:50 PM PST by gitmo (If your theology doesn't become your biography, what good is it?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Morgana

I totally thought this was real


20 posted on 02/20/2022 4:47:10 PM PST by Levy78
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-52 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson