Posted on 11/16/2021 4:53:47 AM PST by servo1969
WASHINGTON, D.C.—The modern military takes on a lot of duties. There’s meeting diversity quotas. There’s Critical Race Theory training. And there’s helping the environment. Also, thrown in there are some requirements to protect the country. Well, the Pentagon has announced a new policy that will help the U.S. military meet some of those goals: They’re now switching all weapons to swords and bows.
“We have a deadly enemy out there,” announced General “Sparkles” McKenzie, “and it’s called carbon. The problem with modern-day weapons is that they take a lot of carbon to make. But if we get some nice bespoke swords or bows and arrows, that will help us stay carbon neutral, and you can all sleep safe at night.”
The Pentagon outlined many advantages to swords and bows other than their environmental impact. For one, it helps the military get rid of the M-16, a rifle they had wanted to stop using for a while, since it resembles the AR-15 preferred by right-wing nutjobs. Also, swords and bows don’t make loud noises, and loud noises have been known to trigger more sensitive soldiers.
There are some problems with the new policy, though. Some military simulations have shown that swords and bows do put the military at a disadvantage against armies that still use irresponsible gunpowder and explosive weapons. “We have a modern weapon for that,” explained McKenzie. “It’s called the hashtag #StopTheBang. Everyone get on Twitter with that, and I’m sure we can shame our enemies into doing the right thing.”
i recently told my mom
“at the end of the day, you can’t rely on tanks powered with solar panels and compost patties”
More likely point-ed sticks and bananas.
Note to the BB: Metallurgy baaaaad.
Firefights are all about making noise. At least give’em some blanks to fire.
Just read how the US Army is developing an EV Hummer.
Yeah. That will work out great.
Horse farts are a huge GG source. I don’t think horses can be allowed.
It’s solar powered robot pack mules or nothing.
Not trying to step on the satire but carbon is used in swordmaking.
I don't think Alec Baldwin would agree with you on that one.
I know it’s satire however there are some US Marines that would still be fierce warriors with only a sword. USA…USA…USA
Buttons and bows is more like it.
Silks and satins and linens that shows, too.
I want to sing and dance, I want to sing and dance
I want to be a pirate in the Pirates of Penzance
Wear me silver buckled slippers and me tight shiny pants
I want to sing and dance
“It ain’t the size of the dog in the fight. It’s the size of the fight in the dog.” —Mark Twain
The Pentagon needs to shut off all electricity in the building.
It is time for the brass to stop talking the talk and start walking the walk.
Let them wear sweaters this winter!
One round into the batteries and the whole thing has a significant chance of a massive fast energy discharge. Wouldn’t want to be inside. Worse than a gasoline fire, and we moved away from that to diesel generations ago.
And this is how the woke military will drill from now on. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qxs3gmewuhI
...hmmmm...not so sure about that....I don’t see any “fierce warriors” in the future United States Marine Corps.....this is a very recent article about the decline of the USMC...it’s all about diversity, you peasants....
“The Marine Corps, the smallest U.S. military force, has plans for a big overhaul designed to address its lack of diversity and problem with retaining troops.
“The goal that’s driving what amounts to a cultural shift within the service, is for the Marines “to reflect America, to reflect the society we come from,” Gen. David Berger, commandant of the Marine Corps, said in an interview with NPR’s Morning Edition.
It’s not a matter of being politically correct or “woke,” he said.
The core of America’s strength lies in its diversity, Berger said, adding that the same is true for the military.”
1. Removal of Halon fire suppressant systems on armored vehicles because they are ozone depleting. These were replaced by a new type of system that essentially works with a water mist and does not work as well because it does not suppress the fire as quickly, doesn't work as well in small crevasses nor is as persistent. We are “literally” making a theoretical threat (the ozone hole) more important than a crew survival system.
2. The push to removed Depleted Uranium from the arsenal, both in ammunition and armor. Fact is, there isn't anything out there that beats DU to make holes into another armored vehicle. The combination of DU’s lack of mushrooming on impact (unlike Tungsten and other alloys), it's extreme density, pyrophoric effect, hardness and elasticity (it doesn't shatter that easy) make it pretty much the ideal material. The performance advantage of DU is significant.
3. The push to remove lead. You are limited in your options in all reality. They came up with the M855A1 which besides costing more, causes more malfunctions and wear on the gun. However, it is at least in its target effects comparable.
When you define “function” as things other than your prime purpose in life (to fight wars: kill people and break things), you lose effectiveness.
All of these racial, sexual, sexual orientation, environmental, family status (married, single with children, dual service) issues have a performance cost. Fortunately for us, we have been fighting third rate military's in the last three (3) decades. We shall see what happens when we meet a peer or near peer some day.
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