Seems like a nice story.
Posted on 08/15/2021 5:26:23 PM PDT by george76
WADSWORTH, Ohio — For years, an Ohio woman has wondered about the son she gave up for adoption more than three decades ago. What does he look like? What does he do for a living? Was he happy?
Well, thanks to the popular DNA genetic testing service 23andMe, she now has those answers and more.
Melanie Pressley was just 18 when she got pregnant with her first child — a boy. Her boyfriend at the time wasn’t supportive and wanted her to get an abortion. Pressley refused and continued on with the pregnancy.
But eventually, she knew she couldn’t keep him.
“I just knew, financially, I wouldn't be able to do it. And the other thing—I wanted him to have a mother and father, so I decided at that point it was best to put him up for adoption,” said Pressley.
With the support of her family, she went through the adoption process with an agency based in Akron.
On June 17, 1988, she gave birth to her son at the then-Timken Mercy Hospital in Canton. She didn’t name him because she wanted his adoptive parents to have that honor.
She said that day, she wasn’t allowed to hold him, but the next day, her sister asked a nurse if they could hold the baby.
“She said, ‘I will take you into a private room so that she can hold him,’ and she said, ‘Take all the time you need.’ And at that point, when I was holding him, my sister took a picture and that was the only picture that I had of him for 33 years. That was the only picture that I had of him,” said Pressley.
Pressley has had three more kids since then and is happily married, but she said every day, and especially every time June 17 rolled around, she thought about the son she gave up for adoption.
“There was still always a little bit of that sadness in me on that day. And that's basically the easiest way to describe it,” said Pressley.
In Winchester, Virginia, 307 miles away from her Wadsworth home, it turns out Pressley’s son was thinking of her too.
He was adopted by the Vossler family and named Greg. They lived in Stow for about seven years after he was adopted, and then moved to Winchester.
“Maybe nine or 10 or somewhere around that age range, they shared with me the story that I was adopted and that the woman who gave me up for adoption thought I could have a better life elsewhere,” said Vossler, who still lives in Winchester.
Vossler said his curiosity wasn’t immediate.
Some years later, he found descriptions of his birth parents that were provided from accounts from the hospital, but there weren’t any names, birth dates, or ages.
“Never was really curious. I'd always joke saying, you know, ‘I don't see a celebrity that looks like me,’ or, ‘No one who's a king or queen in some faraway land resembles me.’ And I always said that was just my joke. You know, whenever somebody asked, it was just my way of having that quick response in my back pocket, I'd never really given it some serious thought,” said Vossler.
But he said it was always in the back of his mind through college, getting married, and raising two sons.
“The reason I named my first son Gregory was because he was my first blood relative that I knew. So I wanted to have that bond,” said Vossler.
Then, in 2019, he decided he wanted to know more.
“My wife and I were sitting and talking one night, and I'm like, ‘I don't know any of my medical history, genetics, you know, where I'm from.’ And there was a 23andMe promotion or something going on. And so I took the test,” said Vossler.
That same year, Melanie’s mom died, which pushed her to do what she’s always wanted to.
“It was always my wish that I wanted him to meet my mother, but she passed away. And the night that she passed away, we were all around the table, my nieces, nephews, my sisters, and everybody. And we were going around just kind of saying things and it got to me and I had just started crying and I said, ‘I need to find my son,’” said Pressley.
But that moment didn’t come until May 2021, when one of Melanie's daughters bought her a 23andMe test as a birthday gift.
The results came back in just days and with them a match to a potential son named Greg Vossler.
“Instantly sent a message, and my first message was, I believe we're related,” said Pressley. “The next message was, I believe I am your birth mother. And from there, it just blew up.”
“One of the very first questions I asked him, which was big for me, was, ‘Are you happy?’ And he came back that he was—oh my gosh—that he's married, he has two boys. I mean, it was just like spilling everything,” said Pressley.
Messages on 23andMe turned into emails and finally texts.
Vossler said they vetted each other thoroughly to make sure the connection was real.
“We were very investigative with each other, you know, the hospital where I was born changed the name. So I said, ‘Well, do you remember the hospital where I was born?’ And she said the name that it was back in 1988. And I was like, ‘OK, alright we got there,’ and there were a few additional things that I had asked and she answered, she passed the test,” said Vossler.
“You're just sitting there and it's not something that you can ever prepare for mentally, and the way I would constantly describe it was just a surreal moment,” said Vossler.
But when Vossley asked if he could call Pressley, she told him she didn’t want to hear his voice until she could see him in person.
So in June, Vossler, his wife Chelsea, and their sons drove to Wadsworth for a weekend.
Both Vossler and Pressley were worried that the connection wouldn’t happen and that it was somehow all a farce, but they were happily mistaken.
Vossler’s wife took a photo of when the two saw each other for the first time.
“I am so thankful for her for doing that because it was the very first time and it was awesome,” said Pressley.
Vossler said he and Pressley talked for four hours straight that first day. He also met 17 members of his new extended family, including two of his siblings, his aunts, and his grandfather.
“Everyone's emotional, everyone's shaking hands or hugging. And, you know, ‘Hey, I'm your half-brother, your half-sister.’ And her oldest sister, who was instrumental in allowing Melanie to have that first picture, came up and grabbed my face. The first time in 33 years that she's seen me,” said Vossler.
“It's an amazing feeling. And it just goes to show that there's always room for families to grow and always room for more love within each other,” said Vossler.
Pressley and Vossler are continuing to nurture their newfound bond. Pressley and her husband, Tim, plan to travel to Virginia this weekend to meet the Vossler family.
Vossler and his family have also been invited to his half-sister’s wedding this fall and plan to attend.
“I am just excited with the ball moving and I am just going to soak up every moment and just enjoy it. Enjoy the little ones also with every opportunity that we get to see them,” said Pressley.
Now, the picture that Pressley’s sister took of them 33 years ago in the hospital isn’t the only one this mother and son have together.
“Life has a funny way of giving you what you need, not what you want. And I guess life just realized that we needed this connection and our families needed each other,” said Vossler.
How crappy of her.
What a betrayal of his real parents who raised him.
“I just knew, financially, I wouldn’t be able to do it. And the other thing—I wanted him to have a mother and father, so I decided at that point it was best to put him up for adoption,” said Pressley.
Should’ve stuck with your original plan, Lady! He HAS Parents! He HAS a FAMILY.
Why do people that start out with the best of intentions turn selfish?
I’ll bet she voted for Slow Joe. *Rolleyes*
If only the entire world were as holy as you.
These days, apparently, many peeps have two mommies.
Don’t forget the Chinese hacked all these Dna databases and used them to help create their engineered, targeted biological weapons.
This current one is only a test.
It’s just basic honor.
But I guess some people are just genetic doomed to be trash.
Stories like this tell us to leave orphans in orphanages. Otherwise you’re just raising a cowbird or a cuckoo bird.
The outcome was nice, but did I read correctly that this genetic test supplied the lady with the name of her son without his prior knowledge?
If that is what occured, a few minor changes may be in order. Perhaps the adopted child does not wish to be contacted, at least not at that time.
This is a good tool of investigation, absolutely, but either party should always have the right to say Yes or No to full identification.
23 and me is not government so one cannot be stopped. I’m just glad she chose life. 33 years is long enough. No one will be traumatized by a meeting.
As the wife of an adopted man, I can tell you that it’s something a lot of adoptees want and need. If I had given up a baby for adoption, which is often an honorable thing to do, I would have forever felt the loss. It is an act of love, to give up your own child for his own good, but many adoptees need closure. It took a long time for my husband to forgive his birth mother, but he was finally able to see that it wasn’t that he was unwanted, it was that she was a 16 year old kid who could not make a home for him, especially since her mother had tried to abort him and the father ran off and joined the army; she had no support. She, herself, was unable to have any children after that, adopting two children, years later, after she married.
Possibly - there was a question when ordering the 23andme test that requester is open to notifications?
Possibly - names were not shared unless both agreed.
I doubt if the young man didn’t want to meet her, he would have allowed it.
God bless them both!
We have two adopted sons. Both were adopted either at birth or shortly thereafter.
Both grew up knowing their birth mothers and their families. One grew up knowing his birth father and his birth father’s mother.
One of my sons occasionally spends a week with his birth mother.
We made the right decision raising them like this.
For those of you who know who the rapper EMINEM is, he has a 19 y/o daughter who has told the press she is angry at him for not telling her that she was adopted.
This Gal has also recently declared herself as “Non-Binary”.
So there!
You sound like a really sleazy person. I am glad I will never have the misfortune of making your acquaintance.
Yes, it’s real sleazy to expect loyalty to the parents who raised you.
Next, I’ll do something horrible and expect married people to be faithful and peoples’ word to be their bond.
Nothing but brood parasites. Cowbirds. Cuckoos.
Go! Raise my spawn! I’ll be back for them later, sucker!
Thanks for all the hard work and sacrifice of raising my kid, fool!
Thank you for sharing this story for the people that have very little insight into this world.
What a creepy, hate-filled weirdo you are.
Does your parole officer know you’re on the Interwebs again?
Human Beans are complex, even on the psychological side.
One “solution” is not optimal for all.
Seems like a nice story.
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