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Incentive Offered To Up Cuomo Book Sales (Satire)
05/18/21 | RetiredTexasVet

Posted on 05/18/2021 3:48:20 PM PDT by RetiredTexasVet

Due to disastrous lagging sales for Gov. Andrew Cuomo's book, an incentive is going to be offered to buyers of Cuomo's new book.

Although the book deal is a thinly disguised laundered money bribe and payoff, a minimum number of books need to be sold to keep the appearance of legitimacy of the book deal. To date, only a limited number of sketchy buyers have opted to purchase the book.

To entice the larger number of sketchy buyers the publisher has purchased 100 puppies to be raffled off to the buyers of the book. Each book buyer will receive one chance at a puppy with the purchase.

Since the buyers do not have the power to kill grandparents like the Governor, the publisher is offering the next best thing ... a chance to kill a puppy and experience the thrill of killing something that can't fight back.

The publisher is sure that the incentive will up the sales among the Governor's followers and fans.


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Humor; Pets/Animals; Society
KEYWORDS: sarcasm; satire; scorn

1 posted on 05/18/2021 3:48:20 PM PDT by RetiredTexasVet
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To: RetiredTexasVet

Very confusing.

Allegedly, Cuomo got $5.1 MM for his book. Honestly, who on earth would buy his dopey book.

OK, so it was a payoff. What does he need to be paid off for?


2 posted on 05/18/2021 3:54:13 PM PDT by Attention Surplus Disorder (Apoplectic is where we want them)
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To: Attention Surplus Disorder

“What does he need to be paid off for?”

Maybe for purposely decreasing the elderly population in NYS. The seniors are sucking the money up like a vacuum. I know. My mom lives in NYS and the state picks up the cost for so much!!

And it’s creepy. They practically beg you to let them pay for things through their program. Then that gives them the right to come through your home, comb through your finances, etc. We’ve said, “No thanks”, and handle things ourselves. She does get Meals On Wheels, which is not intrusive, and a county function.


3 posted on 05/18/2021 3:58:10 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (I prefer the challenges of life to the guaranteed existence - Prof. Dean Alfange)
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To: RetiredTexasVet

4 posted on 05/18/2021 3:58:28 PM PDT by simpson96
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To: RetiredTexasVet

free burial for nursing home covid victims?


5 posted on 05/18/2021 4:02:08 PM PDT by joshua c (Dump the LEFT. Cable tv, Big tech, national name brands)
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To: Attention Surplus Disorder
OK, so it was a payoff. What does he need to be paid off for?

Just a guess, but could it be a lot of Dem politicos wanted to rid themselves of Republican mothers-in-law or other elderly Republican relatives?

Gets rid of their headaches and increases the Dem vote total.

6 posted on 05/18/2021 4:05:09 PM PDT by DeFault User
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To: RetiredTexasVet

pithy summary of the cash flow.


7 posted on 05/18/2021 4:13:40 PM PDT by ptsal (Vote R.E.D. >>>Remove Every Democrat ***)
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To: RetiredTexasVet
Since the buyers do not have the power to kill grandparents like the Governor, the publisher is offering the next best thing ... a chance to kill a puppy and experience the thrill of killing something that can't fight back.

Perhaps you can create an even better incentive for the book buyers...

When an admirer of Cuomo goes to perhaps purchase his book...

show them the list of people who were murdered by Cuomo's decision to put them in harms way...

and perhaps then, they'll be more motivated to buy the book.
8 posted on 05/18/2021 4:18:09 PM PDT by adorno
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To: joshua c

Hart’s Island by Rikers inmates.


9 posted on 05/18/2021 9:35:36 PM PDT by rxh4n1
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