These hilarious church signs in N.J. will have you praying for more

The Star Ledger of Newark ^ | 01.28.19 | Tim Hawk

[Coleus]

praying for more By Tim Hawk | NJ Advance Media for NJ.com and Lori M. Nichols | NJ Advance Media for NJ.com | Posted January 27, 2019 at 07:00 AM | Updated January 28, 2019 at 10:22 AM 0 shares 19 Comments Mullica Hill Baptist Church, Mullica Hill. (Tim Hawk | NJ Advance Media for NJ.com)

I was looking for a sign from God.

Not a literal sign from the Almighty, though if He happened to enlighten me with something I wouldn't mind. No, I was looking for an actual sign -- in front of a church.

Most church signs tell us service times, who the pastor is, or some upcoming activity. But some pastors find ways to inspire us from outside the walls of the church.

Sometimes a message is all we need to brighten our day or make us completely angry -- any sign referring to politics for instance. We see these messages on bumper stickers, T- shirts and billboards. But there is something about a sign in front of a church that either makes you think or gives you a hearty chuckle.

But why do some churches constantly put up these funny signs? Might one particular pastor have a better sense of humor than another? Or is there an underlying message to the saying displayed?

[Publius]

DO YOU KNOW WHAT HELL IS?

COME IN AND HEAR OUR ORGANIST

[fredhead]

Not a sign, but....

The pastor was ending his sermon on temperance:
“If I had all the beer in the world, I would pour it in the river. And if I had all the wine in the world, I would pour it in the river. And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I would pour it in the river.” Then he sat down.

The choir director rose, and told the congregation, “For our closing hymn we will sing #365 ‘Shall We Gather At The River.’”

[Bethaneidh]

Great, that Kate and Edith.

[taxcontrol]

My favorite:

How do you want your afterlife?
Smoking or none?

[pepsi_junkie]

I saw one last fall that said “Come try our new pumpkin spice communion wafers! Just kidding, but come anyway!”

[pepsi_junkie]

I saw one last fall that said “Come try our new pumpkin spice communion wafers! Just kidding, but come anyway!”

Holy cow, that specific sign is one of the examples!

[RedStateRocker]

“Love everyone...

I’ll sort ‘em out later”

-God

[tiki]

LOL, our choir last night, it was so bad my body was in pain.

[DataJunkie]

These were great, needed the faith lift, LOL

[left that other site]

THE LADIES OF THE CHURCH HAVE CAST OFF CLOTHING OF ALL KINDS, AND CAN BE SEEN IN THE NARTHEX ON YOUR WAY OUT OF THE SERVICE.

[Tell It Right]

My all-time favorite was on an AME church two decades or so ago when they put up two messages, one on top of the other:

LOVE ONE ANOTHER

SIGN UP FOR KUNG-FU LESSONS TODAY

:) :) :) :)

[jimtorr]

I think my favorite is:

“Do you have children? For those who don’t know, we have child care in the basement.”

Emailed to me by my aunt, who as a pastors wife collects these church funnies.

[Ol' Dan Tucker]

The church across the street from ours always has pithy sayings on their billboard. Here's a couple that stood out.

Anyone can honk. Tithe if you love Jesus.

Now open between Easter and Christmas.

[MosesKnows]

Loved them all but this is still my favorite.

Church is a hospital for sinners, not a rest home for Saints.
Hughesville Baptist Church.