Posted on 05/09/2017 1:12:47 PM PDT by nickcarraway
What does the typical Billy Joel fan look like? Its a serious question. We can, I think to at least a small degree of accuracy, guess what the typical Sex Pistols fan looked like back in their heyday, or the typical Spice Girls fan in theirs. But, what about Billy Joel? His music is so nondescript, so family-restaurant friendly, so bland, so cheesy, that its lack of concrete identity aside from its popularity and its blandness makes it difficult to imagine just who buys his albums, just who packs the sold out arenas.
Lets think about it this way perhaps Billy Joel is the suburbs of music. The term ugly is so often misapplied to the suburbs (some, at least). I say misapplied, because the suburbs, as Ive lived them, are not positively ugly, like, say, Jean Dubuffets Art Brut, but rather they have a sort of negative ugliness, which is to say, they lack any qualities whatsoever. The ugliness of the suburbs is in reality nothing more than the banality, the boringness of the suburbs. As opposed to brutalism, which can often be ugly, but in a positive, fascinating sense, if the suburbs are oppressive, it is only because there is nothing to latch on to, nothing interesting. This seems to me the best description, by way of analogy, of Billy Joels music negatively terrible. This, again, does not bring us any closer to visualizing the typical Billy Joel superfan, but it at least lets us theorize about why we cant.
In any event, the occasion for these thoughts is, of course, Joels birthday. The man seems, like the suburbs, timeless hes still around, still making music, still selling out shows. Long after were gone cockroaches, Joel, office buildings, and, probably, (I shudder at the thought) The Eagles. But my hatred for Joels music doesnt run as deep as some. Despite his eternal dullness, he does have some okay songs. No, if you want some real, wonderful, joyous vitriol, look no further than Ron Rosenbaums 2009 article for Slate, The Worst Pop Singer Ever. Rosenbaum is the author of books like Explaining Hitler and How the End Begins: The Road to a Nuclear World War III, so when he writes about Joels music, well, he knows what hes talking about. The article is one of those perennial internet gems, the epitome of evergreen content so long as Joel is around (forever), this article will be necessary. But enough from me Happy birthday Billy, and heres Rosenbaum.
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Give me a break. His music is way ahead of Michael Bolton and Rod Stewart, both of whom sound like they’ve gargled with razor blades and always look like they’re totally whipped. I’m not sure how either of them ever earned even a dime in the music business.
Billy Joel’s lyrics are very understandable and well thought out.
He’s not terrible. Like a lot of folks he was better before he got popular. Once the fat money starts rolling in holding to creativity can be tough. Those first couple of albums are solid though.
Agree
I’m guessing that Joel failed to endorse the Weeble Wobble®.
I love Joel’s music and have ever since Piano Man. Have almost all his stuff on my MP3 player.....................
ping
That title made me LOL...
Not a fan of Billy Joel.
Bruce Springsteen is up there in awfulness as well.
Seriously, how many “notes” do you hear that potato sing?
That and in some songs he sounds like Sly Stallone from “Rocky”, example: when he says “down in jungalaaaaaand”.
And lyrics?
“And they wind up wounded and not even dead.”
Really.
The writer has obviously never seen Billy Joel live or has seen or heard Bruce Springsteen. Besides being a Hillary loving idiot, Springsteen is quite possibly the least talented musician out there.
Had the opportunity to interview Joel about 7 years ago for my “Seven Events” book. Good interview. He & Keith Emerson were the only 2 of maybe 100 rockers I interviewed who did not cite the Beatles as their reason for getting into rock.
Has never seen Bruce....
I think the writer of this article has a screw loose.
VERY strange piece of writing.
.
Billy Joel created lots and lots of great music.
He made a lot of money, his accountant absconded with almost all of it, then he made lots more. Things like that can take quite a lot of wind out of your sails...
A good American whom has ordered multiple custom boats from American craftsmen.
I’ve love to read the rest of the article, but it won’t let me unless I subscribe.
What an absurd article. Billy Joel is not everyone’s cup of tea. Ok, we get that.
Not sure what the alleged banality of suburbia has to do with this, but we’ll give the author poetic license to do his stream of consciousness commentary..
It all depends what music you enjoy.
If you enjoy hard rock, headbanger or heavy metal sounds, Billy Joel isn’t your man.
If you are seeking the sounds of jazz or blues, Billy’s not your guy.
If you want country music, Billy is not your guy.
I like some of his songs. They are fine for a mellower pop music type of sound.
Maybe this writer is just so into hard rock or rap or whatever the heck some of these people put out today, that he doesn’t like the sound of Billy Joel.
You may be right.
I may be crazy.
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