Posted on 12/13/2016 7:22:43 PM PST by lafroste
OK, my son is at Parris Island right now and as of today has one month to graduation. He is hanging tough. But he wrote me and asked for more letters, more news. My fingers are about worn out sending and writing stuff. He likes Marine jokes and I sent him a few but I am running out of ideas. I would like you guys to submit Marine positive humor that I can send him to encourage both him and the other men in his platoon. We need to encourage these guys. Jokes are welcome. Letters are welcome. Help me support our newest Marines. They already deserve it!
He will be more popular is he tells jokes about the Navy.
LOL. Those work too!
The man thinks for a moment, then says, "Well, he learned what 'now' means."
So these two Marines...
POW...WHAP...SMACK...THUMP...
(bending over to pick up teeth)
...nevermind.
Can’t help you, only Marine jokes I know are not positive
I was Army you see. :)
Tell him to hang tough!
I guess the Navy and the Marines have some kind of feud going, or something.
ungh
My son went through PI years ago.
I sent him “The Far Side” collection,which was popular then.
He loved them,as did the rest of the guys.
.
Q. How many Marines does it take to screw in a light bulb.
A. Marines don’t screw in light bulbs ...
I’m Navy. I served with some Marines during the period 3/67 thru 12/70. I can joust with Marines all day long, but I have only respect for them. I think they also respect us, the squids.
While waiting for the coffee to finish brewing, he decided to pose a question to his staff.
He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep.
He posed the question as follows: "Just how much of sex is 'work' and how much of it is 'pleasure'?"
The XO chimed in with 75-25% in favor of work.
A Captain said it was 50-50%.
The CO's Aide, a 1Lt., responded with 25-75% in favor of pleasure, depending on his state of inebriation at the time.
There being no consensus, the CO turned to the LCpl who was in charge of setting out the morning's paperwork and making the coffee.
"What's YOUR opinion, son?"
With out hesitation, the LCpl responded, "Sir, it absolutely has to be 100% pleasure."
Surprised, the CO asked, "Why??"
"Well, Sir", replied the LCpl, "If there was any work involved, the officers would have me doing it for them."
As an Army vet my only encouragement would be to tell your boy that I also wanted to be a Marine but they found out my IQ was too high so they sent me into the Army. :-)
(Heh-Heh, all in good fun)
Thank you for the ships, the chow, the really big guns, and most of all for the Corpsmen.
Semper Fi.
L
“Now, you still wanna tell that joke?”
The sailor says, “Nah, I don’t want to have to explain it three times.”
Military Intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
Naval Intelligence is redundant.
"Ceterum censeo Islam esse delendam."
Garde la Foi, mes amis! Nous nous sommes les sauveurs de la République! Maintenant et Toujours!
(Keep the Faith, my friends! We are the saviors of the Republic! Now and Forever!)
LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)
A Marine and a Sailor are making a head call. The Marine zips up and heads for the hatch. The Sailor calls out “Hey Marine! In the Navy they taught us to wash our hands after we pee.”
The Marine replies “They taught us not to pee on our hands.”
Semper Fi.
L
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