Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Because I have work here.
And when I came here my daughter was underage but got a contract with NYCB so she needed her parents to come.
We are seriously discussing not being here soon.
Oh Nully, I hope everything goes ok.
Me too!
That workout does not apply to the part of NJ where I live. It’s Tony Soprano I would be worried about.
I understand about wanting to leave manhattan.
My sister and I this weekend were discussing where we would live when the parents were gone. She wants to move from the manhattan area to Denver. I told her I couldn’t move there. I need a blue or purple state/ town.
YAY!!!! It won’t hurt, I promise!
You are in my prayers today. :o])
W000t!!! ;o])
Wow, it’s lunchtime already.
Awwww!
Yes, it is!
Sitting with the peeps today was actually pleasant, with no cold wind out of the north! Most of the peeps are still out there, but I had to come in because my stamina was flagging.
I canceled the procedure for tomorrow and it has been postponed to June 21. Folks who don’t have to go to the doctor very often don’t know what it’s like to have to go to a medical office every time I turn around.
The clothes are hanging, and about half-way dried, so I’m good. I’m a little tired, but I haven’t had any more pains since this morning, so that’s a good thing! :o]
Glad to hear it! It’s time for me to go get Tom at school.
I just had a baked pork chop for lunch, and a small cup of ice cream to chase the pills, so I’m good for a few more hours. YAY!
Sounds good! I’d like to go to sleep, but I have to start making supper in a few minutes.
I want to go to bed but I’m waiting for a phone call. It’s been a busy Monday.
Nully, good luck with the procedure.
Off to surgery in mere minutes!!!
“I don’t run. Period.”
A Gentleman Never Runs. (Except in exceptional circumstances)
Hope the Eye Maintenance goes to plan.
Love it!
That can only be in one Country, the driving is on the Left. :)
The New national minimum wage has come into force today. £7.20 per hour.
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