Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Never packed a bathroom, but I do pack our shower and propane fired water heater for the yearly trek to the middle of PA..
But - this house has two bathrooms and there are occasions when each bathroom is occupied by a female. Most of the time that is not a problem because there are many sites on the 78 acres here that benefit from nitrogen enhanced liquid fertilizer..
Reason number 746 under the heading of “Why I’m glad I’m a male.”
Along those lines, the bambi population is not in the least impressed by my marking the territory. Must not smell like Coy-O’Tay. Or Liquid Fence.
Which I think is a good thing.. ;-)
I would willingly donate the ‘600’ to a worthy adversary in the battle of the numbers. :D
Oh, Tails. It’s Historical.
LoL. :)
They picked themselves up and dusted themselves off.
Tough little characters,those Lettuces.
Good. :)
0044
Time check: 06:06.
{Good morning Moose. I'm finishing up a print job (A lady down the road a piece pays me a small stipend to print her monthly newsletter - six pages duplex printed and collated.) It would print faster if I had more memory in my printer, but I tried getting a supposed equivalent memory stick because HP wants a lease on my firstborn for one from them, but for some reason the printer didn't like it and wouldn't start up with that stick installed.}
I did bring over the shower curtain.
And TP...
Outstanding...
Good morning, NoC.
That joke has been listed under *groan*. :)
Are you up late or early, can never tell.
Whoosh!
Golly...Now I wonder why I’ve never seen you on Facebook... I miss you already!
Facebook can be a very addictive time consumer if one isn’t careful.
There is always another post to read...
I’ve eliminated all but a few news threads, and blocked quite a few people, but FB allows me contact with nieces and nephews and yes, even my kids, that I wouldn’t normally have. So I stay with FB - at least for now.
*groan*
It always amazes me how those critters can put their little cat butts onto something so small...
I’m up, and moving. Not well, though. And this is laundry day. And I think tomorrow my new aide is coming in. I’m not sure I want her. I just don’t want to train someone new. Every time I get one that knows what she’s doing, they pull her off without telling me about it ahead of time.
I will get the pills and ulcer stuff as soon as I can after laundry.
Good tagline, Nully, you punster!
I’m glad you have some place to sleep. Have you been living out of your car?
That’s a pretty cool photo of a weather system, Moosie. Is that the one that hit Iceland last week? Or is it a new storm? Or just a stock photo?
Stay warm, either way!
Good morning. I’ll be taking some people to the gym shortly. After that, I have ideas like going to the Post Office to mail Anoreth’s present and going to the Chinese grocery store to see what unusual vegetables they have.
How's Tricks in NV this morning?
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