Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
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Welcome to the Daft side ,Rod. :)
Good Morning, TC.
The box was all part of the Larger cat’s cunning plan to secure the heat pad.
Afternoon, Moose07. Did you have an enjoyable Christmas?
Very Pleasant,thank you ,TC.
How was it with you?
Disaster-free! (But very warm.) Neither the cats nor the children have yet done any harm to the faux tree or the ornaments.
The Activated Carbon Face mask was useful yesterday.
People with colds shouldn’t go to Carol services.
But they do, so on it goes.
Silver spray down the throat and hope for the best.
Oh, dear. Several of my family members are sneezy and coughy, but we think it’s allergies due to the freak summer weather.
good morning my favorite peeps still no luck with the computer and I’m getting frustrated cuz paydays comingI tried to set up my nook and my phone as a hotspot but the phone isn’t cooperating.I’m going to get on the phone with Dell again very shortly and see if I can’t get the computer running.I’m having withdrawal symptoms
it feels like 19 degrees outside with the wind like it is would never think that for a desert.
The X-ray tech (who has been there done that) said I would hurt the most on the 3rd day after the accident, she was right.
Good luck on the computer! I sorted my clothes this morning. I’d misplaced the black tank top with the lace edging; it was the last thing I found!
I am sorry you hurt Nilly. but I do understand if I could I’d give you a massage.
I have to sort my clothes too since tomorrow is wash day.
I am able to get online as far as dell.com is concerned but my internet Explorer is not working so I can’t access anything else.and I had no luck on getting my phone to be a hotspot.however the cricket store opens at 9 in the morning and I will go find out what the problem is.at least with being able to use my nook I can get my banking done.
this newer device doesn’t appeal to me
I saw a sign in the gym yesterday:
“It never gets any easier: you just get stronger.”
The unstated message is the 4th day is better than the 3rd.
I hope it is!
Morning ‘Face.
Dell Service ,here in the Peoples Democratic republic ,is usually very good, they should have it fixed fairly quickly.
Ibuprofen.
Take it easy ,Nully.
Are you sleeping okay?
Oxycodon, sleeping poorly
And I have heard that on the seventh day, you will be able to rest.
That’s just a rumor.
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