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Thanks to TheOldLady for this scathing social condimentary.
1 posted on 06/19/2012 12:27:33 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows
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To: Slings and Arrows; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; Darksheare; OSHA; ...
When caught, the robber will be given a severe dressing-down.


2 posted on 06/19/2012 12:30:10 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Not sure what the appropriate punishment would be for this heist, but you can bet when the guy is caught, he’s going to be whipped...


4 posted on 06/19/2012 12:34:50 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: Slings and Arrows

They used to be 32-oz jars, think they’re a little smaller now. Even so, it sounds like these internationally reknowned condiment thieves made away with a few cases of mayo.

The great nickel robbery was more interesting.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6826757/ns/nbcnightlynews/t/millions-nickels-stolen-fed/


5 posted on 06/19/2012 12:36:33 PM PDT by treetopsandroofs (Had FDR been GOP, there would have been no World Wars, just "The Great War" and "Roosevelt's Wars".)
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To: Slings and Arrows

When I told the guy to, “hold the mayo” I didn’t mean for him to five-finger-discount it!


6 posted on 06/19/2012 12:43:50 PM PDT by Jack Hydrazine (It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine!)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Hair dressing for Debbie Wasserman Schultz?


11 posted on 06/19/2012 1:14:49 PM PDT by SWAMPSNIPER (The Second Amendment, a Matter of Fact, Not a Matter of Opinion)
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To: Slings and Arrows

It could be terrorists, planning to start an epidemic of salmonella by offering everyone wonky macaroni salad.


14 posted on 06/19/2012 1:27:44 PM PDT by Tax-chick (Spinach at every meal.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

“T hey urged anyone who heard of people making large quantities of coleslaw or potato salad to notify authorities”

Honestly that’s the dumbest statement I’ve ever seen. Ya think? How many restaurants are in that town. And who knows, it could be a private citizen prepped.


15 posted on 06/19/2012 1:28:58 PM PDT by goseminoles
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To: Slings and Arrows

Work all night in the Deli Bar
Ham on buns and we wanna go home
Fill de orders cause de boss man come
Ham on buns and we wanna go home

Come Mr. Deli Man, Deli me bologna
Ham on buns and he want some more
Come Mr. Deli man, Deli me bologna
Ham on buns and he want some more

It’s sixth shift, seventh shift, eighth shift, Lunch!
Ham on buns and we wanna go home
Sixth shift, seventh shift, eighth shift, Lunch!
Ham on buns and we wanna go home

May
We say May-ay-ayo
Ham on buns and we want some more
May
We say May
We say May
We say May

(Softly)
Ham on buns and we wanna go home

(Excerpted from author: http://www.amiright.com/parody/authors/matthias.shtml )


20 posted on 06/19/2012 1:40:54 PM PDT by P.O.E. (Pray for America)
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To: Slings and Arrows

I have an alibi.


24 posted on 06/19/2012 1:50:45 PM PDT by GSWarrior
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To: Slings and Arrows

Must have been foreigners. A real Aussie would have been off with the Vegemite.


26 posted on 06/19/2012 1:55:49 PM PDT by Deek
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To: Slings and Arrows

Reminds me of the TITANIC shipment of Mayonnaise going to Mexico to replace guacamole.

They celebrate that loss each year as the “Sinko de Mayo”.


28 posted on 06/19/2012 2:16:49 PM PDT by Ruy Dias de Bivar (I LIKE ART! Click my name. See my web page.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Hell, man! You’re welcome.


29 posted on 06/19/2012 2:22:03 PM PDT by TheOldLady
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