"Honest, Officer, Those Drugs Hidden In My Crotch Are Not Mine"

Smoking Gun ^ | 12/17/10 | Smoking Gun

[Lmo56]

Jessi Clark was riding in the front passenger seat of a Cadillac Wednesday night when Florida cops pulled over the vehicle after spotting the 29-year-old without a seatbelt.

As the driver spoke with cops, Clark allegedly “pulled out a piece of paper towel from her crotch” that had three Oxycodone pills and three Xanax tablets. Clark, pictured in the mug shot at right, then denied that the drugs she fished from the vicinity of her private parts were her property, according to a police report

[Huntress]

My criminal defense attorney colleagues tell me that there are three cardinal rules that criminal defendants should follow:

1. Don’t talk to the cops.

2. Don’t talk to the cops.

3. Don’t talk to the cops.

[Dacus943]

"If the drugs aren’t hers, I wonder who put them there?"

I don't know, but who ever did, has some mad skills!

[Drew68]

The driver most likely told her to hide the drugs while he was being pulled over and then lied. This story seems more plausible. However, she could just stupid or on drugs. ;^)

It is plausable. Nonetheless, she's guilty for hanging out with dirtbag losers --a lesson that can be painful and costly.

[OwenKellogg]

>> I don’t know, but who ever did, has some mad skills!

Was hoping no one would snatch them.

[OCCASparky]

Three pills? Not as bad as the girl from Maine who got busted with 16 GRAMS of coke stuffed up her “hoo-hoo”. What made that case even funnier is that the driver gave the NH trooper a false name (they bought the coke in Mass.) and when asked to spell it, botched it.

[Doogle]

"holding them for a friend"

Cop:"you wouldn't happen to know where his hockey stick is,do ya?"

[goat granny]

If the drugs aren’t hers, I wonder who put them there?

Santa knew she was good all year and left her a present early....

But what cop would want to touch the package after it being where it was, can you say crabs, bedbugs, pin worms....yuk

[driftdiver]

These people will snort their drugs off the seat of a public toilet. I doubt they would care where the drugs had been.

[driftdiver]

So the lesson is... Paper towel wrapped drugs in hand are worth two in the b.....

[Navy Patriot]

29 years old? She knew something about the drugs. If she were ten Years younger she might have been duped by a low life boyfriend, not at 29.

[Lmo56]

I like the last paragraph that recounts a similar experience:

"In late-September, a Florida man gave police a similar story when they discovered a bag of cocaine hidden inside his buttocks. Strangely, the suspect admitted ownership of a bag of pot that was also wedged in the same place."

[Larry Lucido]

I knew you could eat at the Y. Apparently you can get good drugs there too.

[Slings and Arrows]

Maybe she's one of the groupies from this thread. Rock stars can be so absent-minded.

[Joe 6-pack]

"I knew you could eat at the Y. Apparently you can get good drugs there too."

It's the only place to go for crack.

[KosmicKitty]

I'm going to have to go with "not too guilty" on this one...

I'd have to go with "not too bright" myself.

[meyer]

I'd have to go with "not too bright" myself.

Perfect!

[Paleo Conservative]

Updated link.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/oxycodone/honest-officer-those-drugs-hidden-my-crotch-are-not-mine

[a fool in paradise]

If the drugs aren’t hers, I wonder who put them there? Santa knew she was good all year and left her a present early....

Santa's got a list. He knows who's been naughty and nice. He's been checking that list TWICE for the naughty girls.