Drunks love tossing dwarfs.
Posted on 02/12/2009 5:53:23 AM PST by patton
A LANDLORD down to his last two customers in the credit crunch has put up signs outside his pub begging for more.
Publican Tim Gibson, 43, failed to attract drinkers with meal deals and flyers stuffed in letterboxes.
So he stuck blackboards on the pavement outside the Royal Oak in Blean, Kent, pleading for business.
One reads: “Wanted. Customers. No experience needed as full training will be given. Please apply within.”
He put up another aimed at wives which says: “Free husband creche. Is he getting under your feet?
“Leave him here while you shop — just pay for his drinks.”
Tim said: “The blackboards were the last resort — it’s a funny message but the sentiment is deadly serious.
“If we don’t get new people in we’ll close.
“We’ve got a small group of regulars — well, two at the moment — but it’s not enough.
“I’ve been in the pub trade for years and never known it to be like this.”
Andy Brown, one of the remaining regulars, said: “The only good thing is you get served straight away.”
“Leave him here while you shop — just pay for his drinks.”
Ok, I laughed.
That is a very funny ploy.
That is wierd - usually, booze is recession proof. One of the “Sin Stocks.”
In good times, people buy expensive booze - in bad, the rotgut.
Is this partly because of an anti-smoking ordinance?
Works for me!
I don’t know, but the thought had occured to me...
I haven’t been to England in 15 years, but it seemed that pubs were catering to an older crowd and seen as more stodgy and uncool. the young folks were going to clubs and discos.
Well, that may be it — but the Baby Boomer crowd is now the Stodgy Crowd. They’ve been driving economic trends for 50 years. But maybe they’re still in the clubs, refusing to just sit quietly and have a Guinness at their local pub.
Drunks love tossing dwarfs.
Throw in free airfare and I’m there!
The UK government tax the hell out of a pint and a pack of 20 smokes. That’s some of the problem. Also, smoking has been banned in pubs (except in pub gardens - if the have one) and that put a ‘big hurt’ on business when that passed. I guess people just decided to drink and smoke at home.
When we went back last year for a visit......some of the pubs were selling snuff. I just preferred to have a smoke outside. I just can’t seem to enjoy a good pint without a good smoke. JMO
I could not remember if smoking in pubs was banned in england - I was there last summer, but I never got a chance to leave post.
Smoking is banned in public places in England. I.e. restaurants, office buildings, pubs,. etc etc.
Then I rather imagine that is a factor.
There you go, an unintended smoking thread.
The majority of comments point to the smoking ban in pubs being responsible.
Perhaps the two remaining customers are the non-smokers, who insisted on the ban?
Anyways, it's expensive to license a bar. Even a small one in Massachusetts on January 1st, needs to come up with 10-20 thousand in various 'license, fees, permits'. The one I am most familiar requires over ten licenses, which are really no more then ever hairsplitting mark-of-the-beast shakedowns to be allowed to do business.
Anecdotal, booze selling is fairly off with both salesmen and delivery guys saying business is slow.
On the positive side, I hear Obama is going to build People's Sports Stadia and in exchange for lower manditory government health tax extractions will have manidoria North Koreans type mass morning exercises with accompanying loudspeaker lectures by The One.
So, we have that going for us, which is nice.
Leisler.
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