Posted on 08/17/2008 10:20:46 AM PDT by Daffynition
Dolores Aguilar 1929 - Aug. 7, 2008
Dolores Aguilar, born in 1929 in New Mexico, left us on August 7, 2008. She will be met in the afterlife by her husband, Raymond, her son, Paul Jr., and daughter, Ruby.
She is survived by her daughters Marietta, Mitzi, Stella, Beatrice, Virginia and Ramona, and son Billy; grandchildren, Donnelle, Joe, Mitzie, Maria, Mario, Marty, Tynette, Tania, Leta, Alexandria, Tommy, Billy, Mathew, Raymond, Kenny, Javier, Lisa, Ashlie and Michael; great-grandchildren, Brendan, Joseph, Karissa, Jacob, Delaney, Shawn, Cienna, Bailey, Christian, Andre Jr., Andrea, Keith, Saeed, Nujaymah, Salma, Merissa, Emily, Jayci, Isabella, Samantha and Emily. I apologize if I missed anyone.
Dolores had no hobbies, made no contribution to society and rarely shared a kind word or deed in her life. I speak for the majority of her family when I say her presence will not be missed by many, very few tears will be shed and there will be no lamenting over her passing.
Her family will remember Dolores and amongst ourselves we will remember her in our own way, which were mostly sad and troubling times throughout the years. We may have some fond memories of her and perhaps we will think of those times too. But I truly believe at the end of the day ALL of us will really only miss what we never had, a good and kind mother, grandmother and great-grandmother. I hope she is finally at peace with herself. As for the rest of us left behind, I hope this is the beginning of a time of healing and learning to be a family again.
There will be no service, no prayers and no closure for the family she spent a lifetime tearing apart. We cannot come together in the end to see to it that her grandchildren and great-grandchildren can say their goodbyes. So I say here for all of us, GOOD BYE, MOM.
My sympathy for the loss of your son. I’m so sorry. The newspaper writeup is a lovely tribute to you, too.
What a beautiful tribute Ladyak. It is so difficult losing a youngster. My sympathies to you and your family.
Also, if you go to the Times-Hearld link under the headline and scroll to the bottom then click on the “View/Sign Guest Book” there are a couple of choice remarks there also.
Classic! So where is the real MF and where did you hide the body?
But for not being one of the beautiful people, that man in the obit sounds like he was a wonderful human being.
I only began to understand my mother after I saw Livia Soprano.
“He’s dead, Bones!”
“It’s worse than that; he isn’t dead yet, Jim!”
My wife’s mother is not doing so well right now. Since I’m an in-law I keep my thoughts to myself, but my wife and brother-in-law have made it very well known that when she does pass there will be a sigh of relief throughout the whole family when it happens.
Since I have seen the physical scars my wife bears to this day I hope she dresses casual and comfortable when she meets St. Peter, it will be the last time she will ever be comfortable again IMHO.
Some people’s only redeeming quality in life are their offspring, and usually you have to sit back and wonder how they turned out so well considering what they had to overcome.
Aaaack, that was brutal! I’m not so sure it’s a good idea to have done it in public like this.
A friend of mine had a mother like Ms. Aguilar, and there weren’t too many tears when she passed. They handled it by sending a short obit in the local paper, and then they all got together, family only, and had a let-it-all-out party.
Unfortunately, my own family was in that situation, when my mother passed away over 30 years ago. She was a disturbed, depressed, & very damaged woman (probably a borderline personality disorder) who most likely herself had been abused. She died very bitter, refusing to see anyone.
My older brother, who was royally messed up by her, did not even want to attend the funeral. To this day he hates all women.
The 10 Commandments say to honor your parents. It's hard when there's not much to honor. People can have great superficial qualities, but be profoundly deficient in the qualities that make for marriage & parenting.
I always advise to smile politely, find something, anything (She baked an AMAZING fricassee of muskrat pie!) good to say, (We will always miss the 3:00 AM visits from our friends at the police department) and then find a good friend and tell your side of the story. Or write it down.
Wow. Now that’s just sad.
Then again, my grandmother’s obituary could have read the same way if the daughter writing it had decided to up and let it all hang out.
Wisdom may come with age, but sometimes age arrives all by itself. I don’t think that woman ever learned how to be happy. Let’s just say it was obvious the funeral director tapped to lead the service never knew her, LOL.
It’s legit
http://www.legacy.com/TimesHeraldOnline/DeathNotices.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonId=115754551
Here’s the guest book
http://www.legacy.com/TimesHeraldOnline/GB/GuestbookView.aspx?PersonId=115754551
Until you’ve been thru it, you have no idea what it’s like.
It’s been removed from the site. :)
He has one grave in Texas somewhere and I'm guessing the one in California is located in the city or county cemetery (unmarked).
She's not 100% sure he's dead, though. He was a hitman for the mob. LOL
I was appalled and couldn't understand why such a nasty, petulant, whiney, spoiled brat type obit was even published.
"Honor thy father and thy mother" was obviously foreign to him, and his father had never hit him, ran around on his mother, or any other terrible thing. Junior was well fed, given a very expensive education, but that wasn't enough. He literally kicked the corpse of his father.
I once read an interview with A. A. Milne’s son (the real Christopher Robin) concerning A. A. Milne. The phrase “petulant ingrate” pops to mind.
Too much traffic, no doubt.
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